Overtired toddler won't sleep-HELP

[CCsweet]

Hi
I am posting this due to desperation. I think that my 28 month old has recently cut his upper second molars. From what I have seen and counted anyway. The past 3 weeks of sleep have been horrendous!! I am sleep deprived and fed up. I am sure he is too! Currently at my wits end. I am guessing when the molars started coming through, this had an effect on sleep? No idea! We had to switch him to a cot bed as he was launching himself out of the cot. Waking up multiple times in the night needing reassurance and also trying to get in to our bed. For a few nights he started off in his bed but then came in to ours out of desperation for some sleep. My 28 month pre all of this would self settle and would sleep through the night. We would give him cuddles, kisses and then would say goodnight. No problem at all! Now I am having to sit in the door way until he's gone to sleep. He's refusing to nap, though he needs it because he's in a state of overtiredness! I am having to do car drives because he just won't sleep in his room in the day. Last night within the space of 2 hours, he was awake six times. Waking every 20 mins/30 mins. I told him yesterday in the day that when it's bedtime mummy will sit by the door and wait for you to go to sleep but then mummy is going to get in to her bed. Last night I kept on going over this. After these 6 wakings he's got up and climbed in to my bed and then has woken at 0500. I strongly believe he is in a state of overtiredness and I don't know how to get out of it. Everything I try fails. Yes he has a good sleep environment etc etc. Appropriate wake windows etc. I have tried having earlier bedtimes, he just won't go to sleep. Limiting screen time during the day. I went even as far as turning off his pink noise machine (water sound) to see if that's impacting. He asked for it back on. My son is a good communicator but he can't tell me why he is waking or what is wrong. Most of the time he wakes up crying. At this point I feel as if I am going to have to sleep on his bedroom floor. I went as far as looking at sleep consultants yesterday. When I am sleep deprived I feel myself having no patience, getting frustrated at my husband and just wanting to cry.
Please, can anyone shed some light on now to get an overtired toddler to sleep 😭

If you’re at the desperate stage I’d give him a dose of antihistamine and get one good nights sleep.

If you think he's in pain (teeth) give Calpol or nurofen. It's probably not this though if it's been every night for two weeks. Now he can get out of his own bed it's harder but I would stop over communicating everything and do the supernanny 'back to bed' method. First time they get up, 'night night it's bed time' put back into bed, kiss leave. Repeat but no more talking after this point, just pick up and back in to bed.

This can take a while but the point is not to reward the wake ups with loads of cuddles and explanations and fun and games, just being consistent that bed time is sleep time not fun with mum time. Will take forever the first night, whatever you do don't give in!

It’s on the younger side but it could be possible that it’s the nap that needs to go. Generally if they’re fighting it to the point where you can only get it by driving around then they’re ready to drop it and it’s possible you’re stuck in a vicious circle of he needs the nap because he slept badly at night but then he’ll sleep badly at night because he had the nap.

Also, if it’s teeth give nurofen. Sounds unlikely if it’s been going on 2 weeks but a dose tonight can’t hurt so I’d try it.

We also had sleep blips around this age (linked to dropping the nap, sorry!) and I’d rate the Supernanny method too. Anything else like sitting in their room they just woke up wondering where we’d gone. I’m a big believer in falling asleep how they’re going to stay asleep being a big part of a restful night so if I expect them to sleep alone in their room then that’s how they must fall asleep.

Try a few days without the nap. At that age if mine had even a short nap they were not going to be tired enough for bed until very late and ended up getting less sleep over all. 2-2.5 is a perfectly common age to not need a nap any more.

Then absolutely do the supernanny. It really works. You do need to be prepared to gently and calmly put them back to bed 100 times or more on the first night. But it drops away after that as they know you mean it.

I don't think "wake windows" are a thing for a child who is nearly 2 and a half!

What does an average day look like? I would try and increase the time he spends outdoors and active tbh. And sack off the nap, that might help.

Thanks everyone for your useful tips!! I am going to give some of them a go, especially at night time.
Perhaps try reducing the nap or going cold turkey, depending on his mood. However, do you have any tips of how to initially get out the cycle of overtiredness. Because he's so overtired from the lack of night time sleep, he's tired by 0800 in the morning after being awake. Do I offer a bridging/power nap?
Thank you :)

Forgot to mention we are good at being mostly active. LO spends his days outside at nursery, it's a Montessori/forest nursery. We are mostly out most mornings and afternoons, either walking or in a shop lol .
Thanks everyone.

Any chance you can take him swimming? Not sure if you could time that before bedtime (very wet nappies afterwards!) or maybe before when you want him to nap. Always used to completely wipe mine out, if I wanted them to sleep or not!!!