Hi,
I have a 6 year old a 12 week old and I’m really struggling with sleep deprivation.
When my 6 year old was a baby, his sleep was so bad, it almost broke me. I thought there’s no way baby no. 2 could be that bad, but we seem to be on the same road once again, so it must be something I’m doing, and I’m desperate for advice and help…
I started doing everything by the book - I looked for sleep signals and put him down when he was drowsy but not asleep. It worked a few times and he took himself off to sleep. But over the past 6-8 weeks, this has lessened to never happening at all, and now we have to battle to get him to sleep every single time. He will now only sleep if he’s on us, and he will only fall asleep if we walk and rock him, if he’s in the car or if he’s in the carrier.
It’s also now pretty much impossible to transfer him into his cot once he’s asleep - even after waiting 20 mins plus for him to get into a deep sleep. His arms flap wildly and wake him up - we’ve tried swaddling and he now absolutely hates it.
I didn’t mind him napping on me in the day time as he would transfer to his cot and stay asleep in the evening and night. But now he won’t transfer in the evening and he has to be on my husband all evening. I’d go to bed at 8pm to get a window of sleep and at 11pm, he’d bring him into me - he used to then be ok at transferring into his cot after he’d wake to feed through the night (I’d need to hold him for 20+ mins, but he would then go down and stay down). But now, even this is vanishing.
So, we’re now in a position where he will only sleep on us day and night and it’s impossible for us to get enough sleep to function.
My husband has a full on job and he needs his brain to work. I need to look after our baby and also out 6 year old, who is just getting such a crap mum and dad right now - I feel so sorry for him.
I’ve tried shushing and patting, rolling him onto his side to do patting, holding my hand on his tummy. Even if I do get him to transfer, he mostly only stays down for 5-10 mins and then he wakes up and I have to start walking around/ rocking him to get back to sleep and then start the whole ordeal again…
I know it’s a phase and I know it’ll get easier and I know it’s normal…. But please please can someone tell me how to get my baby to sleep in his cot, so I can also get some sleep be sure my mental health is completely shot.
Thanks