Help! Cant keep baby asleep in cot

[Hg011]

Our baby is 2 weeks old, and we’re having trouble getting her to stay asleep on her back in the cot or Moses basket.

she goes in ok and doesn’t wake straight away, but after a couple mins she wakes and a starts moving like she’s in discomfort (arching back, pulling up her legs, screwing up face etc) and quickly starts crying.

We’ve got white noise and a swaddle and are spending 20+ mins burping before she goes down, but it’s making no difference.

im having to stay awake with her all night while she sleeps on me, and im terrified that im going to fall asleep with her like that. And generally i dont know how ill sustain this each night…,

any thoughts or suggestions would be greatly appreciated!

I ended up co sleeping because of this , I felt it was actually safer than the risk of me accidentally falling asleep while holding the baby all night !

This is normal for a newborn. We tagged holding ours at night for a few months and then just did safe co sleeping. If your breastfeeding, not smoking, or drinking then I'd just recommend that.

You'll find that the babies who sleep well from birth are left a bit. I picked mine up at the slightest sqeak. The newborns who slept through were being left quite a while longer. Different mums have a different tolerance to hearing their baby upset. I didn't realise this until mine were toddlers and had more open conversations with other mums.

If you’re EBF and follow all safety advice then cosleep. Means you can sleep while feeding too. Cosleeping is the norm for many cultures around the world.

And congratulations!!!

The sooner you realise that baby wanting to be close to you is totally normal in the fourth trimester the easier it all becomes. They’re a tiny infant who’ve never been cold before, hungry before, they don’t know what life is away from your heartbeat. I know it’s hard/tiring, but as others have said you can safely co sleep or take turns. You cannot spoil a baby, soak up all the cuddles.

My daughter was the same she didn’t sleep unless being held for weeks. We shared the nights so I did half my husband did the other as we didn’t want her waking my 5 year old and a mum needs sleep too!

do you have any support who could pop around like a grandparent to help for an hour on really bad days (after a sleepless night) for you to have a nap?

sounds a bit like colic or reflux - not sure if it’s too soon for infacol? Otherwise ask midwife for suggestions as docs can help if it could be reflux. My daughter has a milk allergy and reflux so I feel your pain with the sleepless nights! Xxx

Mine didn't start to settle in the cot until about 3 months old. And even then it was only for half the night. In the newborn stages, i had to do a lot of mental work to accept that I was basically nocturnal temporarily now, and i stayed there with her napping on me (I was breast feeding so had to be there most of the time) and sometimes I would transition her to her swing next to me in the lounge, or lay her on the sofa. Suddenly I realised she was sleeping decent stretches on the swing or sofa so I started to put her in the crib. But until then I basically stayed awake until at least 4 am then handed over to my partner. But he has flexible work so I was able to sleep 4 hours straight then, and she took a bottle of expressed milk with him to let me stay asleep. The other option is for you to sleep a bit in the evening and then stay up most of the night and sleep a bit in the morning. Everyone will be tired for a while, but it will improve xx

My daughter had the same problem, baby was unsettled after being placed in the Moses basket. I shared my experiences from when she was a baby and suggested popping a hot water bottle in the basket ( obviously removing it before putting baby in!) so that it was nice and warm when moving away from being held. It seemed to work and after a few days the baby got used to being transferred and slept well.

I do not generally offer advice as things have changed so much since I had my children but this wasn’t a case of telling her she was doing something wrong, more of a positive suggestion!

Very common and normal. Sorry, doesn’t make it any easier.

Co sleeping (lying down next to baby) works for some people

Swaddling works for some people

Sleepyhead or similar works for some people (though they are now not recommended for overnight sleeping)

Tilting the moses basket so head is up works for some people

Reducing wind can help - wind them half way through and after each feed, look out for any loose latch issues and get checked for tongue tie if it is suspected, keep upright for a while after each daytime feed (sling may help), tummy massage/bicycle legs, gripe water, etc. Wind gets a lot better by itself in time but will take a while.