Parents of awful sleepers. Please tell me it gets better!

[Lizbiz89]

My nearly 11 month old has always been a pretty horrendous sleeper. He currently still wakes 3-4 times a night. I put him in his cot independent of the boob but still wakes for booby time multiple times a night. I have resorted to co sleeping otherwise I just wouldn't get any sleep. Do I need to start changing sleeping habits or will he start sleeping longer stretches naturally soon? What is everyone's experiences with their bad sleepers? I'm so exhausted of nearly a year of no sleep 😫

It gets better! Little by little.

Yes it does! My 3 were chronic. I’m not going to lie when I say that there was a point when DH and I were almost completely broken by it.

they didn’t reliably sleep through the night until they went to school (sorry) but now they’re 12, 10 and 7 and all 3 sleep like a dream.

He doesn’t actually need milk. Sorry but you need him to learn to resettle himself without using you as a dummy. But I know how difficult it is.

It gets better! My eldest didn't sleep 8-6 until she was about 3.5 years old. But she's slept every night since

It's completely normal and natural to feed back to sleep.

OP, just do whatever works the fastest. You all need more rest. That's more important than some fictional "rod for your own back". They all sleep through the night eventually

It definitely gets better! Can you start thinking about night weaning? I know that’s tricky if you’re co-sleeping.

Unless you break the boob sleep cycle it won't improve. I have quite severe health issues so ended up doing CC after months of no sleep. I was so grumpy during the day I was barely functioning and not a great mother. Tbh I wish I had done it sooner. But either way you have to stop feeding at night.

With my DD it got better once she stopped bf.

No advice OP but needed to hear this, we are in the same boat with 11 month old having 3 feeds overnight. Sometimes we are up every hour! Sending hugs x

DC1 didn't sleep through until she was 2.3 yrs by which time I was far enough through my pregnancy with DC1 that I was getting up at least once or twice a night to do a wee! Then DC2 didn't sleep through until he was 3.5.
DC2 was simply a high needs, velcro and life would have been better all round if I had simply accepted that and parented him accordingly rather than trying to force him into what everyone said he "should" be doing. Unfortunately, I was too knackered to step back and see that! He's now a teen at grammar school, plays a sport at county level and has a lovely group of friends so he's doing OK.

Normal and natural, yes. I used to do it. But not 3-4 times a night regularly for an 11-month-old. But I’m not saying I know the solution, just that a baby of that age is doing it for comfort and sucking, not nourishment.

Yeah I would love to night wean but also don't want to leave him to cry, especially for extended periods of time. I used to feed him to sleep but I have gradually over time stopped that so he goes into bed awake and without me rocking or boob. I also have 2 older dc who I don't want to wake so CIO just isn't an option. This is all very new to me as my older dc pretty much slept through the night from 6 months. Obviously my dc3 thought it was time for payback 🤣. I've been researching and the Jay Gordon method looks like quite good so I might try that after my dc has gotten over his cold. But yes the lack of sleep is absolutely brutal. I never thought I'd get to a year and still be in the thick of it. Sympathy also with all of the other pp who are going through the exact same thing. Hugs xx

Long term lack of sleep isn't good for your health op... After 9 months of no sleep I had ds sleeping through in 3 nights. One cherub emerged and 1 happy dm which rolled over to family life. Worth doing op. No cio necessary..

@Spenditlikebeckham how did you do it? I'm open to any suggestions at this point 😬

Ds had taken a bottle once a day since tiny. First night sent dh in with a bottle. He drank 2 oz. Then zonked out all night. Second night dh offered water. Settled after a few sips. Third night slept 7 til 7. He woke from habit /knew I would come and offer bf. Dh sadly wasn't willing to do that!! Honestly he transformed into a dc a pleasure to have at last!!

@Spenditlikebeckham ah we can't do that as my ds is a bottle refuser 😫. I have read that nuks do bf teets but I'm not if I should be introducing a bottle at this stage? It's all a minefield.

Yes it does. Mine didn't do a 4hr stint till 11 months after Co sleeping and feeding constantly. I moved to a toddler bed with a high tog grow bag with feet and arms and feed to sleep and rolled out. When we had space he moved to a double bed and improved lots not including regressions and illnesses

Ps I wouldn't listen to those blaming boob boob will be your saviour throughout this

Could dad not settle him? Could you go away to visit someone with the older two so you don’t have to hear him crying for the first few nights?