Hi all.
Our almost 5 year old DS is causing us major issues. Since he was 2.5 years old he has refused, point blank, to sleep alone.
At first we thought it was a phase, so we did all the usual methods, gradual withdrawal etc. He would fall asleep but only very lightly, when he heard the smallest of noise he would wake up and scream that we’d “left him”. He’d be so upset that he’d make himself vomit.
Fast forward another 2.5 years. We have tried everything. Two sleep consultants, letting him sleep with us, letting him fall asleep with us then carrying him into bed, falling asleep next to us downstairs, controlled crying, retreat method, getting him a worry monster, specific books to read before bed, talking about big feelings, comforting him, rewards charts, getting a Tonie box, getting a new bed, nightlight, the list goes on. We have tried each method consecutively for 3-4 months at a time. None of them have worked. He needs us to be upstairs with him.
He has now started school and still refuses to sleep alone. In fact he is now standing on the landing at 9pm refusing to go to bed because he “doesn’t like his bed”
DH and I haven’t had an evening in front of the tv together for 2.5 years. We are at our wits end and the doctor has put me on anti depressants because I feel like such a failure. I’m tired, have no social life and I’m worried my DS will be too tired to keep up at school. We also have a 20 month DS who is kept awake by the older DS’ night time antics.
Please help us…anyone. I will listen to any suggestions, just please help before my relationship with both DH and DS breaks down anymore. 🥺