31 weeks pregnant and my toddler who has just turned 20 months is pretty bright for her age. Never had a problem with sleeping before or separation anxiety for more than a few days, but since about month 3 of my pregnancy she will scream for me all day. She used to enjoy going to play classes at the gym crèche, soft play, going with other relatives for the day as I work Monday - Wednesday. Now it is just absolute hell on earth. She screams MAMMY BIG HUG through tears anytime I leave to go anywhere. She is fine and forgets about me before long but it’s so stressful to see. The night times are getting worse. Never had a problem with self settling and has been in her own room since 5 months. Never co-slept as she just messes on and tries to play. Currently experiencing screaming when she wakes from 2-5am then her being up for the day at 5:45am. I can’t manage this with a newborn on top of it. She’s not fussed on DH. It’s really taking its toll on my mental health and our relationship. We’ve slept in separate beds since this began as the spare bedroom is next door to DD’s. The master is a loft conversion. I see her after maybe 2 mins of crying, to which she immediately stops and smiles at me asking to come into ‘mammys bed’ which is never something we’ve done. Most nights after going into her room 2/3 times, I do leave her to cry for 10 or 15 minutes, but that hasn’t been working recently. She isn’t allowed downstairs until 6am earliest, has black out blinds and pink noise with no sleep interruptions such as teething or illness. Is this something I’ve created by running to her every need in the night?
Now I’m going to be on maternity leave again, with no sleep as I did want to try to BF, but not even sure this will be possible now with a toddler and newborn clinging to me constantly. She is due to start nursery for 2 mornings per week September 2nd, baby is due September 20th. I am really really worried about how she will adjust and I find myself snapping and shouting at her a lot more now she understands more. She can hold a conversation with you and understands most of what you say day to day. I haven’t mentioned the baby much as she doesn’t seem interested/to understand.
Every other thread I’ve seen involving this it seems to involve pregnancy so I’m aware it is likely due to that. I just need some sort of advice on how to manage/stop the constant screaming all night unless I sleep on her floor. Nowhere near ready to drop a nap. She wakes between 5:30 and 6am daily, nap at 11/11:30 for 1.5 hours and bed ranges between 6:45 and 7:15pm.
Edited to add we have transitioned from a cot to a floor bed about 2 months ago and it did help for a few days but are back to square one. She doesn’t get out of the bed at all and it does have sides on so similar to her cot. Have introduced a duvet too but she moves far too much at night and I’ve been having to adjust it a lot so will be going back to a togged sleepsuit