Almost 3 yr old dragging out bedtime..

[Cocteautwin6]

Hi Mums.

Our son is 3 next month and has had a very solid bedtime routine since he was very young. He also has 30-45 min naps every day. However, he’s now dragging out bedtime longer and longer and it’s becoming quite exhausting for my husband and I. We read three books and then need to basically wait till he falls asleep, which can take ages. Tonight for instance my husband started bedtime at 7:15 as son looked shattered, and he’s still waiting for him to settle now 1.5 hours later.

We’ve tried cutting the nap at nursery but he will always find a way of napping when I pick him up from nursery, at around 5pm, in the car or pram. Plus he always seems very grumpy and overtired. I may try this again though.

My friends with babies are all in a similar boat as we had kids at the same time, which is why we’ve not found a suitable option so far. Advice welcome!

I meant to say toddlers, not babies. We’re way past that stage thankfully!

Does he go to bed more easily if he doesn’t have a nap? My son was 2 in April so quite a bit younger but only has a 45 min nap and then is in bed for 8pm. Even then it can take him up to half an hour to fall asleep. On the days he skips his nap he’s a bit grumpy but much easier to get to bed and much earlier!
I feel like probably the answer at nearly 3 is to drop the nap but I appreciate it might not be an easy transition!

It’s happened so inconsistently that he’s skipped one I can’t remember - he’s like clockwork with his naps! 😅 might try it next though. 8:45 just seems so late and he sometimes complains about being tired in the morning. Thanks!

Why do you need to wait with him until he falls asleep? Have you tried leaving him with some books and a few toys?

He will just cry and ask us to stay, sometimes I stroke his head too. He won’t stay in bed if we try and leave generally. Defo open to tips on gradually stopping this!

It's a tricky one. I was happy to lie with my daughter until it started taking hours! We had a tough few nights where I'd leave her with her yoto player if she wanted, book and teddy or whatever and I'd just leave and tell her I'd be back to check on her in 5 mins. If she came out crying I'd just take her back again and again. Took a couple of nights but now I kiss her goodnight and leave! I always go back after 5 mins and look through the door and I'll praise her for still being in bed. There were some tears though.

Thank you, that’s really helpful. How old was your daughter when you started doing this may I ask?

She was around 2.5. I find that we have to reset and and do this every now again though. We gently sleep trained her as a baby and could walk out, then as she got older the lying in bed thing started. So we did it at 2.5 but also we've just done it again (she's just turned 3) because she was poorly so the lying with her started again which I don't mind at all when needed. But then she was better and the whole thing started getting longer and longer! It only took 2 nights this time and now we're back to normal again. Last night she was asleep before I'd even got to her bedroom door!

Gradually reduce the length of his nap by 5-10 minutes every few days to see if a shorter nap helps him fall asleep faster at night. Gradually reduce the length of his nap by 5-10 minutes every few days to see if a shorter nap helps him fall asleep faster at night.
Dinosaur Game

Reduce napping.
Be gentle but firm at bedtime.
Most toddlers go though this stage.

Consider adjusting your son's nap schedule by limiting afternoon naps or shifting them earlier in the day. You might also try shortening the hapunan bedtime routine to one or two books instead of three, which could help him settle faster. Consistency is key, so maintaining a regular sleep schedule can also make a big difference.