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Can self settle but not for night wakings.

3 replies

Pinklilly · 23/06/2024 23:33

Hi all I feel a little lost with this! My daughter is almost 9 months and overall has been an awful sleeper. At about 5.5 months it was so bad and we were co sleeping but not getting much rest (either of us) that I did some sleep training to get her to sleep in the cot. It worked really well and she even started sleeping stretches. She now independently sleeps for all naps and night sleep. Naps are of a decent length I feel and she genuinely seems rested. My issue however is the night wakings- she is a child that nothing ever seems enough in terms of trying to support her. So she might wake at 3 hour mark and I will feed her but then she will wake 2 hours then 1.5 then 1 and it’s endless. If I go to her cot and try to shush her (settling method from sleep training) it’s like it’s too stimulating and frustrates her, if I pick her up she will sleep but wake shortly after putting her back down, only sure method is to feed but it’s a cycle then.
I have looked up sleep training but a lot of it says how they fall asleep is what needs changing but that for us is already improved so unsure what tactic to use?
staying by her side and shushing at intervals seems to be making it worse, so is my only option to let her cry- I find that really seems to stress me and makes me more awake whereas a feed at least means we are all asleep quickly. But because she keeps shortening the wake interval I know it’s not sustainable.

does anyone have any ideas how to work on this in the middle of the night when her initial sleep is independent.

OP posts:
annabella8 · 23/06/2024 23:38

not much help but only to say i have an 8 month old exactly the same and i know how hard it is. its exhausting and i feel ur pain. i feed to sleep too as ive got into a rut with it and too exhausted to sleep train but hes now reliant on that to settle. only thing that keeps me going is knowing one day he wont be doing that and will not be baby for long! keep going x

JumpstartMondays · 23/06/2024 23:45

Is she having too much day time sleep? Active in the day? Not tired enough at night maybe?

Separation anxiety kicks in around 9 or 10m and that really has an impact on sleep.

For my first, I would breastfeed in my bed and then transfer them to the cot. It was the only way we'd get any rest.

I've done the same with baby 2.

Roll with it, whatever makes it easier for you to all get some rest just do that. It won't last forever.

Pinklilly · 24/06/2024 22:00

Hi @JumpstartMondays and @annabella8 it’s really nice to hear that I’m not creating the worst situation!
I do agree that it’s so quick to fall asleep for both of us but I just feel like by the end when she’s waking hourly it’s just so tough.

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