10 week old naps - please help

[amy1313]

My DS is 10 weeks old and has never been a great sleeper but I'm really at my wits end with his sleep recently. The only way he'll nap longer than 10-15 minutes is if he's in the sling and I'm out walking. Everywhere else (buggy, moses basket, cot, on me sitting down) he will fall asleep easily (clearly tired) but wake after about 10 minutes usually, very very occasionally 30 minutes if I'm lucky. I've tried white noise, dark room, dummy, swaddling, different wake windows, nothing helps him stay asleep.

Does anyone have any suggestions? He sleeps badly at night too (probably overtired) and I'm just completely exhausted from lack of sleep and can't take him out in the sling 3 or 4 times a day.

If your DC was like this did it get better and is there anything that helped? I'm so desperate for him to sleep better.

Mine was like this for some time. Tbh I wish I’d just embraced it - it isn’t forever and it will be a short lived phase. I gradually managed to get him to nap in his pram when he was about 4 months old whilst out and about. Since maybe 6 months he does a nap in his cot and another in the pram. It feels like it’s forever but it really isn’t. I know it’s relentless but I think the best thing is to just embrace it and lower expectations - he’s still so tiny ❤️

The pram nap changed when I put him in the sitting setting of the pram (not bassinet - he hated that and never drifted off in it)

Thanks for replying! By embracing it, do you mean to just go for walks for every nap or to just leave him be and don't worry about his non existent naps. He's generally relatively happy and chilled during the day, other than the not sleeping! But he can be quite grumpy on an evening from the tiredness and he wakes loads and loads during the night.

I embraced it by going for walks with mine tbh, through the winter as well, it was quite rough but I look back nostalgically on it now! I’d just do what is working for your little one for now, honestly it will be a short lived phase, I promise!

I used a swing chair during the day it was a battery operated one and it was a life saver

Mine was the same. Contact napper by day, sleep refuser by night. It does get better.
Someone told me that they sleep for about an hourcand a half every hour and a half when they're about 6 months if I recall. It meant that I could at least see another opportunity to grab a nap or a lie down.

I got through it by doing shifts with my husband it was the only way anyone got any unbroken sleep

Mine would only ever sleep in the sling, I did it for every nap and then a carrier till maybe a month ago 😴 I found I was able to sit down if I perched right on the edge of the sofa with cushions piled up behind me and then I could still rock and he was still hanging as if I was stood, madness but it got me through 😅
about a month ago he started to nap ok if I was laid with him on the bed, they weren’t as long as contact naps but I can get away with shorter naps now he’s older.
I spent a lot of time worrying about it and then it just sort of changed without me doing much. I know it’s so hard when you’re exhausted though and you can’t sleep when babies on you. It must be so hard walking all day when you’re tired too.
Also he would never sleep in the pram till about a month ago too! Everyone kept telling me it would change and it did.

Thanks everyone for giving me hope! I have an older DD so I know everything is a phase and it will get better but it's hard to keep going in the moment. She was a really good sleeper from early on so DS's sleep (or lack of) was a bit of a shock to the system!

@whyhavetheygotsomany I have a bouncy chair if that's what you mean, and he will nod of in it but he'll wake himself up after 10 minutes or so there too. It does have a vibrate function but he doesn't seem to be a fan of that. Also, current advice is that they shouldn't sleep in there so I haven't persisted with it.

My eldest was like this. Needed contact and movement. It was hard. But she eventually would sleep in a Moses basket by around 6 months. And would sleep in the pram from around 4.5 months as long as it was continuously moving. So I did a lot of walking. It must be hard balancing that with an older child though. I found our yoga/birthing ball a godsend as if my dd was in the baby carrier and I sat and gently bounced on the ball she accepted that as movement. So I could at least stay home for some naps and watch tv and eat lunch while gently bouncing with her in my baby carrier. She was also a terrible nighttime sleeper. But she got there in the end and by the time she was on two naps a day she was a solid napper and nighttime sleeper.

@selondon28 good idea on the birthing ball! My DH sometimes uses it to settle DS but I've not thought of bouncing on it with the carrier on. I guess I still won't be able to rest but at least I can stay in the house for some of the naps! Thanks!

How is he feeding?

I found the first four months exceptionally challenging as my DC was not a fan of sleep for quite a while. I dealt with it by taking long walks for coffee and listening to podcasts as she would sleep in the pram and it helped to be out and about and not stuck in the house. After around four months, things started to get better and she was sleeping through the night at 5 months and reliably napping in the cot for 30min+ 2-3 times a day by 7 months.

Your sanity will be tested and it will feel like it will go on forever, but I promise you things will change, hang in there, you are doing great!😊

I used to be able to get mine to sleep in the sling by walking up and down the stairs and then sit down very carefully on the sofa while loosening the sling a bit so baby not squashed. Prop myself on pillows and make sure everything I needed was close to hand. Sometimes if I was really knackered I'd do this lying on the bed.

(This only worked with my second child, my first would wake up as soon as you changed anything. Turned out she had silent reflux).

@LapinR0se He's EBF. He doesn't often feed to sleep. When he does drop off usually wakes after s few minutes even if I don't move.

@catsnore interesting you mention silent reflux. DS does have reflux but he's not generally unhappy and he's putting on weight very well so not on any treatment for it. He used to grunt and groan all night at first but that's improved a lot.

We're actually having a relatively good night so far. He went to sleep by himself sucking his fist in his next to me at 9pm and just up for the first feed now. He did wake me a few times making noises midnight onwards but seemed asleep so I didn't offer a feed till now.

Thanks everyone for your encouragement. It's so helpful to hear others were in the same position and things improved!

Are you sure he is not hungry?

It was silent (ha! More like screaming) reflux for us too - she'd go down happily but after ten minutes of lying down she'd be awake screaming because of the pain from the acid. For some of them it is about the movement and the closeness though.

I did all naps in the carrier, she hated the pram because of lying flat. I'd bounce her around until she went to sleep, then I'd be able to sit down and watch TV with her in the carrier. We watched all of Mad Men like that.

Both of mine (including the one who would sleep anywhere) had something develop in their their sleep at about 5-6 months where they wanted to sleep in a dark quiet room, which was wonderful! I think youngest still liked a pram nap at that age too.

What can happen with silent reflux babies is that they drink a little bit of milk to soothe their sore throats, then fall asleep quickly due to tiredness, but wake quickly either because the acid is coming back up or because they are actually hungry. This leads to a really vicious cycle of overtiredness. I used to call it snack and snooze for my reflux baby.

I got mine onto max dose medication for reflux and also special formula as she had CPMA, and within 48 hours she was doing full feeds and sleeping in big chunks.

I had the same and I remember searching for stories of it changing! For me my baby wouldn’t sleep longer than 20 mins unless in my arms being rocked in the dark with white noise 🤦‍♀️. I tried everything. In the end I think the 4 month sleep regression helped - she hit it at 3 months and it forced us to teach her to self settle. By about 15 or 16 weeks she was napping in the pram in our bedroom with the curtains shut, white noise and the Rockit on the pram. Over the next month I gradually removed the Rockit, and got her into a cot rather than the pram

now at 9 months my bug bear is that she is such a good cot sleeper but she wont nap longer than 40 mins out so we’re always at home over the lunch nap 🤷‍♀️🤦‍♀️

I used to be able to stop after the 20 minute window had finished but cat naps at that age are very normal.

one was very windy and if he slept on his tummy for the first 20 I could flip him over and he’d stay asleep - the tummy sleeping got the wind up and the startle wouldn’t wake him. I called it his tummy time but supervised as they’re not supposed to tummy sleep.

he will grow out of it though!!