8 month old waking every hour

[Ckennedy]

Hello, looking for some advice please. I have a nearly 8 month old that can still wake nearly every hour in the night, and struggles to nap outside of my arms.
I can get him to nap longer periods in the buggy but as I have an older child it’s not always an option.
I find myself taking the baby to bed at half 7 and staying up there for the night with him because I know as soon as I put him down he will wake.
I'm really ready to get some decent sleep back and my evenings with my husband.
We have attempted controlled crying for one night but he got in such a state and nearly made himself sick because he cried so much that I don’t think it’s an option.
any advice to get him to self settle without me holding him and sleeping for longer periods in his cot?

thanks!

I feel you @Ckennedy ! My little one was just like this (and still can be when sick!). In all honesty it was just time and patience. She now sleeps on my bed (floor bed for her naps). And some nights I can now get her to sleep and creep out for a bit of an evening! But sometimes I can’t.
How do you get your DS to sleep? I absolutely couldn’t do CIO either.

You will be advised all the usual things and have googled them all I'm sure. One thing that worked for us was the baby pillow sleep spray, not always, but often! X

Thanks @Brightandbreezey he is still rocked to sleep most of the time! I manage to reduce it down to swaying while I’m sitting but i have to time it right! My older son was definitely falling asleep independently at this stage so I assumed he’d learn to aswell! How old is your little one?

@Jeannie88 yes googled endlessly and it’s mostly to sleep train. Never thought of the pillow spray, I’ll give it a go! Thanks!

Have you tried a weighted swaddle blanket? I had the same problem, I was like a walking zombie with no sleep. As soon as she realised we weren’t holding her she would be wide awake crying. Anyways I came across a weighted swaddle blanket called - dreamland baby, it’s £79.99 but worth it for sleep. It’s got a load of science behind it, but literally the first night she slept the whole night through- was shocked as I thought it might be a gimmick. Now I don’t have to use it so much as she has got used to sleeping in her cot by herself. Honestly give it a go. Apparently the weighted bit stops their flight or fright response and calms them. Oh also when I put her in it, it works best with putting white noise on my phone, calms her

My DD is now 15 months. Her sleep is so up and down. Sometimes I think I’m really getting somewhere and then it goes back again but I just think that’s the nature of baby sleep and try to roll with it as best I can.
I guess with the rocking just try and reduce it. There is a thing called “habit stacking” where you start adding in a new sleep association (e.g. pat and shush) as you rock and then slowly phase out the old sleep association (e.g. rocking) and just continue with the new one. Takes a while but is a gentle way to change your baby’s sleep associations. More information on Lynsey Hookways Instagram and website (she’s great to follow for advice on baby sleep).
All great ideas from PP… I haven’t tried any of them but worth a shot!
It will get better @Ckennedy , I always find it interesting how different siblings can be. But your DS will get there in his own time and when he’s ready. Tough on you but you’re doing a great job supporting him xx

Also meant to add can your DH help at all? When my partner does get DD to sleep she tends to do longer stretches. Just a thought!

Not that it's any help, but it's completely normal.
We are being woken 8-10 times a night for the past week and a half, with our 8 month old.

My girl was exactly the same. It had been going on for 3 months the and then she started going from waking every hour to waking every 45 mins. We booked ourselves a lovely holiday (where she of course only woke once just to make us second guess ourselves) and then when we got back we moved her into her own room from ours and started the Ferber method. It took a month. But she was a completely different baby, so much happier and well rested. The naps dramatically improved as well. But she did also vomit occasionally but before we did the sleep training she was so miserable and screaming all day from sleep deprivation. She's slept through the night since and given my time again I wouldn't do it any different.

I get sleep training isn't for everyone, I was dead against it until I hadn't slept more than about 45 minutes straight in 3 months (because we all know you don't just fall back asleep!). I was at breaking point and things like driving were becoming dangerous because I was so groggy.

My son was exactly like this!! I didn't want to do cry it out and I thought that was all sleep training is but I stumbled across this woman. She's a psychologist specialising in sleep and she taught me how to get other sleep associations and how to support him to sleep without crying. it's honestly the best thing I've ever done. She was so kind and now my baby actually sleeps without me holding him which I never thought possible!

denzelsdream.my.canva.site/parenting-consultancy⁠(opens in a new tab or window)

Thanks @wellington77 ill try anything at this stage!

Thanks @Brightandbreezey i think I’m just panicking now because I’m back to work in 2 months and I’m so worried I won’t be able to function with the lack of sleep! I’ll have a look into the habit stacking, thank you!

and yes my DH does help out at night but he gets frustrated a lot quicker than me so I end up taking over most nights. DS seems to settle better with me too

@pinkpirlie thanks for the info. I think my 8 month old has never been a good sleeper so might need a bit of help

@spiderplantmum were actually going on holiday in a few weeks and I’m dreading it! So worried he won’t sleep or nap. Glad to know the sleep training worked with a bit of persistence!

Thanks @BoyMum1234 ill have to look into it 👍

This was us. The hourly wake ups lasted until about 18m, and then it was 2-3 times a night until 2. She's 5 now and still has sleep issues (though more like once a night, and may be related to medical stuff now).

She would only settle for me, and with boobs (and believe me we tried not!) so I did all wakes with her. My husband would get up with her in the morning, take both children to childcare, and help me claw back rest where I could, but it was knackering. I went back to with part time when she was 6 weeks old, so working throughout this.

No advice here, but solidarity, and hopefully the hope that however tired you feel, somehow it's survivable.

@Babyboomtastic sounds tough!
I keep waiting for my DS to grow out of it and 8 months in I don’t think he will!

thank you for the message. Not feeling like it’s very survivable at the moment when he had me up every 45 mins last night and then was soo cranky this morning when I’m trying to get my other DS ready for nursery!

@Ckennedy do you cosleep? Only way to get some rest in these situations I’ve found!! I hope you get a break soon xx

This worked brilliantly for my DN, they put it on low and she was out like a light and slept longer.

We end up cosleeping. He def likes to be close x