My little boy is 4 months old.
He has never slept longer than 2 hours. Current routine is we typically try to put him down around 8pm (after a 2 hour wake window). He doesn't usually go off until 9pm after lots of rocking, shushing and failed attempts at transferring him to his next to me bed. He always wakes up at 11 and feeds, and then I'm basically up until 2/3am trying to resettle him in his cot. It's always the same pattern - I hold him, he falls asleep, I transfer him, he wakes up crying 5-15 mins later. At around 3am I can usually get him to settle for another hour and then after 4am he is just on me again until 5am - I then wake his dad up to hold him so I can get an hour before he goes to work.
We follow wake windows, have a bed time routine, use white noise, black out blinds etc.
I don't want to bed share as he is formula fed and we have a memory foam mattress. Also, I have tried lying him next to me and he still tosses and turns waking himself up.
I am exhausted and the whole situation is taking all the joy of motherhood away from me. He only naps on me or in the pram during the day so I never get a nap.
I keep thinking if there is no improvement by six months, I'll try Ferber. Has anyone in a similar situation tried this and had success? Or anyone in a similar situation and found it got better naturally? I'm so so desperate at this point. I always expected to be up throughout the night, but not this much and not for 4 months without any "better" nights.