Winding down 18 month old

[lcw23]

My 18 month old has never been a good sleeper. Never been able to get herself to sleep, never slept through the night. All the sleep training methods haven't worked. Advice from a sleep consultant hasn't worked. For the most part we've accepted she's just a bad sleeper- she had phases where she seems to develop better habits but they are short lived.
Her latest one however, is it takes 2 bloody hours to get her to sleep! We do everything by the book: nice relaxing bath, story time etc. Both of these she loves- arguably doesn't want to end. Consequently, she never relaxes. She's never calm and winding down. Anyone found any unique ways of getting toddlers to relax?! I'm all ears!!

Physically tire her out. My son needs half an hour of charging around/playing chase/wrestling before bed.

@lcw23 have you made any progress with this - this sounds a lot like my 20 month old

You've written this as I've been mid-breakdown about her sleep again. We succumbed to the fact that she just isn't tired till later, which has resulted in many weeks of her not going to sleep until 10pm! Cue exhausted and overwhelmed parents with no time to do anything round the house let alone with each other!
We're a few days into trying to cut her nap to 1 hour and starting bedtime earlier with mixed results, and tonight, not enough patience from me.

@lcw23
Aww bless you, I feel your pain. It's so hard not to have some quiet downtime after they've gone to sleep. We've had some better luck this week by getting her to have an earlier day time nap (11ish). A later nap will absolutely ruin bedtime but she's too young to drop the nap!

Thought I'd give an update on where we're at as a potential ray of hope to someone else. We're approaching 2 weeks of my bedtimes with her being pretty close to the idyllic bedtime I always pictured and it all comes down to giving her options!
First I tell her it's bedtime and she can either walk upstairs or I can carry her. No pushback from her.
After bath I give her the choice of 2 PJs she can wear.
Read her 1 or 2 stories before brushing her teeth and then another 1 or 2 before I tell her it's time to go to sleep and she can either fall asleep on the pillow (on our old bed which is currently in the same room she's sleeping in) or her cot. She always chooses the pillow and immediately lies down and tries to get herself to sleep. Admittedly it can sometimes take 45 mins, but that's of her genuinely trying to relax and get comfy. No playing, no fighting it. I sometimes stand up and give her a cuddle whilst staying as that helps her relax but then she just fiddles with my hair until she falls asleep!
I'm sure there are plenty of people who will think it's bad that she needs me to get to sleep at her age but I don't mind at all if she needs me, and if it gets her to sleep, so be it.

I had read about giving options to toddlers and thought it was a load of BS tbh, but it really has been a total game changer! Hope this helps someone else out there!

I cuddled mine to sleep until he was 2.5 because it was the only way to keep him still and calm him down enough for sleep. Worked fine, he was always a good sleeper once he was asleep. One day he jumped out of my arms and into bed, and since then (unless ill/upset) he's gone to sleep in his bed without us. I did used to sit and sing to him, but haven't done that since he was about 4.5 unless he specifically asks after book.

Honestly, whatever works for you!