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Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

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Original poster

"That baby should be sleeping through by now..."

42 replies

pelafina · 01/04/2008 14:46

Message withdrawn

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Clayhead · 01/04/2008 22:32

Gemy, I'm glad that worked for you but sometimes, even though we try routines etc. it Just Doesn't Work, through no fault of the parent at all.

Yes, getting up every hour with two under two is tiring, I've done it, but it's not a case of choice!

Gemy · 02/04/2008 07:17

Clayhead, yes I appreciate that. I think though if a baby is in a routine they seem to be happier and it's easier for me to know what's wrong and quickly try and meet the LOs needs. The first time around I was not confident at all in my parenting skills so this was a godsent for me. Second time I've just used the same because it's what I know, and when perservered with for 9 weeks every day regardless it seems to have paid off (I am not suggesting you do, but some mums I have spoken to expect a routine to work within days - and I tell them - just doesnt work like that it takes MONTHS!!)

shrinkingsagpuss · 02/04/2008 09:12

Gemy - I agree about the routines thing -if you feel confident in the amount your baby has had in the day, it is easier to leave them to settle themseleves at night. DS fed really well in the day, DD is another story, and I've never been quite sure that she's been getting enogh milk -we got into a bad pattern now when she wakes at night and is hard to settle. now she has a bottle at night, she drains 8 oz so I am more confident she is full - we leave her, even though she often cries on and off for quite a while. (I'll get flamed for saying that!)

Emmahugs · 02/04/2008 09:16

Mine didn't sleep through the night once until she was 6-7 months old and even then it wasn't every night. Don't worry..the more I worried the more stressed I got which was pointless. He's only small..he'll get there.

intravenouscoffee · 02/04/2008 09:23

I first discovered mumsnet after a barrage of comments from well meaning friends about why my 5 month old wasn't sleeping more than 6 hours at a time. Came on here convinced I had a baby with a sleep problem and that I was a crap mother who hadn't 'taught' her baby to sleep properly.... only to discover that I had othing of the sort. Some sleep through earlier than others. I think the comment about weight is a good one, my DD finally started sleeping 8-10 hours when she got to about 13lb which was about 2 weeks after she started on solids. It's really hard and at 5 months I was thinking of giving up breastfeeding as various people had told me she'd sleep better if she were on formula and I was so desperate for a night of unbroken sleep I was contemplating it. REALLY glad that we stuck with it cos she suddenly got the idea and started sleeping 7pm-5.30am at about 5 and a half months. Best of luck, hope it improves soon.

Babyisaac · 02/04/2008 09:38

Gemy, you're very lucky! I tried the EASY routine from the BW and made sure I tanked up my DS in the evening and fed him at least 3 hourly through the day. Seemed logical to me. I also give him the dreamfeed at around 10.30pm. However, he still wakes at 2am and 5am hungry!! Btw, he's 12 weeks.

shrinkingsagpuss · 02/04/2008 09:41

ooh didn't mean to suggest that by giving FF I was trying to get her to go through - I've stopped breast feeding as she was only on the breast for 3-4 moiutes at a time, and because I am going back to work (shifts) in less than a month.

intravenouscoffee · 02/04/2008 09:52

Sorry shrinking if that looked like I was making a comment about you

Really wasn't meant personally, just had a BIL who told me if I FF then my DD would have slept through from 6 weeks (ha!). V sorry if you thought I was critisizing (sp??)

FasterPussyCatGrrrl · 02/04/2008 10:51

my DS2 is 5mths, and wakes every 2hrs. The boy loves the boob!

DS1 wouldn't sleep all night until 12mths.

shrinkingsagpuss · 03/04/2008 17:28

IVCoffee- - no its ok, I was just clarifying in case someone DID misunderstand, no offence taken!!

latchmeregirl · 03/04/2008 22:30

Pelafina, 8 hours sounds to me like a very long time for a 5 month old to sleep - not saying some babies don't do it, obviously they do, but I would have been if either of mine had managed that. At 5 months, it was every 3 hours like clockwork for both of them, despite immaculate Gina-style daytime routines. DD started sleeping through at 11 months and was pretty reliable after that. DS still isn't sleeping through at 10 months though he has pulled a blinder a couple of times in recent weeks and gone from 7pm to 5am, which is, by his standards, highly impressive. But then last night he woke at 11pm, 2.30am and 5.30am. And didn't go back to sleep at 5.30. Sleep schmeep. (Why is there no yawning face icon on MN? Surely some mistake...)

My mother is alo another one for the "but why won't he sleep?" line of questioning. As if I wouldn't do something about it if I knew the answer to that...

chunkypudding · 05/05/2008 13:19

one thing I have discovered lately...

you can't feed a baby that doesn't want to eat.

So it's not always possible to ensure they get all their calories in the day.

ds (15 weeks) fights most daytime feeds at the moment and I'm certainly not going to try and force him! It's a combination of sore gums from teething and general curiousity about everything (and I mean EVERYTHING) going on around him.

If he hasn't eaten enough in the day, he wakes in the night because he's hungry. Always finds it easier to eat then...

So if I decided to give him water or not feed him or something at the moment he would either scream the place down or starve.

Sometimes I think you just have to go with what they are trying to tell you they need, obv a routine worked for Gemy, and many others I'm sure, but a routine is defintely dependent on your lo being prepared to eat at the 'right' time - I think if you haven't experienced a baby refusing feeds this is hard to understand but it is totally beyond a parent's control, and quite upsetting...

snowleopard · 05/05/2008 13:24

My DS was a fantastic sleeper a that age, he slept through from about 2 months and everyone hated us

Now at nearly 3 he's a terrible sleeper, refuses to go to bed, gets up in the night and larks about, wakes early etc.

From my extensive researches I can conclude... it's got nothing to do with anything. They just do what they do... just keep trying and a change will come along - perhaps you'll have a great sleeper at 3.

I've learned to ignore what my mum says since having DS too.

wildhorses · 05/05/2008 13:33

My ds slept through from 6weeks thought it was great
Then hit 8 months that was it he is 8 now and still wakes up
Every baby is different

BerkshireBella · 05/05/2008 13:58

Humans tend to remember happy times better than not so great times... your MIL's baby parenting was done a few decades ago so perhaps she has forgotten the times her babies didn't sleep through. I get 0 sympathy from my MIL for allowing my 13 month old to BF at night (and co-sleep) so I just don't talk about it - we also avoid discussing how she left her babies to cry at the end of the garden for hours! Some things are better left unspoken with MILs

wildhorses · 05/05/2008 14:00

Actually my mil did that put them right at bottom of the garden so she could`nt hear them

bearmama · 05/05/2008 14:10

FWIW..my friend asked how often DD (4wks) fed at night and I couldnt give her a straight answer because i was too sleep deprived to think straight!

And if i cant remember last night your MIL has probably totally forgotten what its like.

My body is perverse because even if she isnt crying i will still wake...but then i co-sleep and prob want to reassure myself she is ok.

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