Did anybody have a 6mo who only napped for 20 mins at a time, but got better?!

[Tinkjon]

DS sleeps OK (ish) in his cot at night but is awful with daytime naps. He will only sleep for any length of time if he's either walked about in a sling or pushed around in a pram (the little sod darling even knows the difference between our automatic pram-rocker and 'real' Mummy-rocking!) I'm desperate to get him to nap in his cot for various reasons, but really struggling. It sometimes takes an hour or so of him screaming and shushing and stroking before he will fall asleep but he only stays asleep for a maximum of 20 minutes before he wakes up again - yesterday it took 1.5 hours to get him to sleep and he slept for 8 mins before waking up and screaming again! He can get himself back to sleep ok at night so why can't he do it in the daytime?! Anyway, I'm trying a few things but none of them really seem to work, so I'm wondering if he could miraculously learn how to stay asleep for longer as he grows. He definitely needs more sleep than he is having, btw, he's not waking 'cos he's had enough sleep. If anybody tells me that they had a baby like this who just started sleeping suddenly later on then you will give me a much-needed glimmer of hope

Also, when he does wake, I'm torn between doing the whole thing again without picking him up (ie. "no, it's not time to wake up yet") or get him up and bring him downstairs and trying again in half an hour's time. The second way will see us putting him down for a nap more often (because he'll only be having little cat-naps each time) but it might at least get him used to falling asleep in his cot by himself as he'll have more practice?

Anyway, gotta go - he's just had his 9 minutes and is screaming again

tinkjon - I had a similarish experience with my second daughter - she woke pretty regularly at night too though, until about 8-9 months. Anyway, daytime naps were particularly rubbish - 20-30 minutes at best. But they did get gradually a bit longer, pushing out to 45 minutes or an hour. But never the 2 hour epic naps of my sleep obsessed dd1!!

Like you with your ds, I felt she needed more sleep - she was constantly tired and grumpy. And although she did improve a bit, she also dropped the daytime nap at well below the age of 2 (again in contrast to dd1 who kept it up till age 3).

I don't have any great suggestions really, except stick with it, and do what it takes to get him whatever sleep he'll do for you, and you some respite to at least sit down and have a cup of tea!

Can't believe I'm about to put myself through all this again later this year!

Good luck

Yes, DS was like this -- naps up til about 7 months were 30 mins to the second, and up til 5 months he would only sleep in the pram or car, or if held. Now at 13 months he has one 90-minute nap a day, in his cot, so there is hope! I think it's very common for them to take a while to get the hang of naps.

Hi Tink... ds used to be like this, he used to only sleep 20 mins maximum during the day. He's currently asleep, has been for nearly 2 hours (I must go and wake him!) I'm not sure what I did, he still sleeps the same during the night. I wish I could give you some fantastic top tip but he started doing it himself. Maybe your ds will do the same

DD1 wouldn't sleep at all in teh day from birth until about 9 months. She would have a power nap for 5 mins in my arms, but ever time without fail she would wake up if I put her down. She did however sleep 5 hours at night from a few days old, and gradually built up to 8ish to 6ish by about 9 months.

Once she was mobile - crawled at 6 months, she slept better - I used to put her in the pushchair in our porch/doorway to watch the cars and she would sleep for up to an hour (usually 20 mins or so), once or twice a day.

It will get better, honest. Try very hard to focus on how lucky you are that he sleeps through the night - sleep deprivation for you is so much worse than burnt out mummy from no break in the daytime - believe me!

dd was terrible, day and night.
She had reflux, so we raised the head of her cot. That really helped. Also changed over to sleeping bag/grobag which made a huge difference.
I also did pick-up, ut-down to sleep train her at around 7 months- saved us!

Fantastic, thanks everyone, that's just what I wanted to hear! DD used to be a dream napper so it's all as bit of a shock to have zero time to myself in the daytime! PotPourri, I didn't say he sleeps through the night, he just sleeps bearably at night He wakes one or twice for food and is usually up for good from about 5.30am - but this is so much better than he was so we can cope with that now.

DD, was EXACTLY like this! Now, at 15 months, she has a long 90 min/2 hour sleep after lunch. I never thought I'd see the day. She started doing this at about 13 months though so you might have a wait! Hang in there.

EachPeach, I haven't tried pu/pd as I never understand how it can work. It seems to me that it would just teach a baby that if you cry you get picked up! Obviously it does work, it just surprises me that it does. I should give it a go though...

yes had one of these

she went to nursery, staff were better at sleeping than me, tada - she slept (around 9 months) really well during day and night

Yes. My dd and ds were both like this and also poor sleepers at night. They are 4 1/2 and 6 now and excellent sleepers. They never did start having long naps in the day and dropped them completely when just turned two.

DS (now 21 months) was like this until 10 months. I tried everything to change it. When I accepted that was just the way he was and chilled out about it, it didn't seem to matter so much. I focused my attention instead on teaching him to be content playing whilst I did the jobs other mums do whilst the baby is sleeping. So whilst cooking I put him in his highchair with toys etc. He had to learn independent play quite early on as I simply didn't have the time. Then at 10 months he got chicken pox. Really badly and knocked him for six. Since then he's had nice long naps! So not something I would advocate and not anything we "did" but worked in our favour! However, I would reiterate - change your perception. Accept that is just the way your baby is, cill out about it and be happy he sleeps so well at night and yes, he probably will sleep better when he is mobile (and gets over the standing up in the cot "phase")!

That's so reassuring - thanks everybody! Of course if I'd instead asked the question "was your baby like this and he never learned to get any better?" I'd probably also get lots of "yes" answers, but I think we'll just ignore that

Weegle, I see your point in accepting that he is like this but it bothers me because it clearly isn't enough sleep for him - he's horrible and whiny all day and it obviously makes him feel horrible (we all know what sleep deprivation is like!) If he napped for sucha short time and that was enough for him then I wouldn't mind, I just hate to see him so miserable from lack of sleep.

MY DS 10mth was just like this drove me bonkers. Slept through 7- 7 at 5 months but during the day cat naps. Hang in there. I decided to stick to a very rigid daytime routine baby boot camp with his naps and in the last couple of months he has got much better hour and a half in the morning and an hour in the afternoon. He is now so much happier in the awake time than he used to be.

LOL at baby boot camp, Jam! How did you stick to the routine, did you try and make him go back to sleep when he woke, or did you let him get up? (and hi, MrsMar, hope things are good with you!)

yep

but like bundle's she now does 1.5hrs regularly at nursery

must get them to teach me how to do it

Yes. My DD2 did not nap properly until she was 8 months old. I persevered with the routine of a nap, even if I was taking her out of the cot 20 minutes after putting her down. Eventually she started to sleep for a decent amount of time. She's never become a great napper (2 hours solid) like my DD1 but she'd nap for over an hour at least most days and still now, at 30 monhts, naps for an hour or so. Don't give up. I refused to believe the people who instsed that 'some babies don't nap' I think they need it and hopefully your DS will get beyond the cat-nap stage and nap for enough time to give you a decent break.

Yes - happened exactly the same for me 20 mins tops for naps and lovely regular hourly wakeups in the night and 5.30am starts for the day......

I got obsessed with my childs sleep but nothing seemed to work. In the end I just chilled with it and didn't try anything else to make her sleep... If she slept, she slept - if she didn't, she didn't.

Now at 15 months she sleeps 7pm - 7am - has a nap for an hour in the morning and 1 1/2 hours in the afternoon!!!!! And I didn't do anything to make it happen!!!!!!

Prbably started getting better on it's own when she started to move around on her own at about a year.

Tinkjon, I was really strict meant we didnt go out for a couple of weeks but at 9am, in sleeping bag, sing song, into cot I used cry down and he would below for 10mins then sleep if he woke after 20mins I would go back and shush him lights off no eye contact if he didnt go back to sleep I would try to keep him in the dark until at least 10. Then up did not allow him to fall asleep or cat nap in buggy or car then I would follow the same routine at 1.30.

tinkjon - my ds was an appallking sleeper and napper. waking after 30mins from naps and waking every 90 mins - 2 hrs during the night. i did cc and it was miraculous. Not for everyone but i was cracking under the pressure of no sleep and no rest time during the day. He was 8mo when i did it btw.

My dd2 used to be a poor napper the only time she would sleep longer I discovered was when she fell asleep in the car sear and or when she was in her all in one coat, It was as if the restriction of movement stopped her waking up so for a couple of months I used to get her off to sleep by rocking her in the car seat, or b/f her to sleep before placing her in there in her room, not the best I know but at least she got some more sleep! HTH