How do I do this?!

[RedPandaFluff]

DD is almost six months, breastfed, and pretty much a velcro baby - only naps in my arms (sometimes in the car seat or pram) and we have been bed sharing since birth as it's been the only way I've been able to get any sleep. We're doing this as safely as we can - DH is in the spare room, no duvets or blankets, sleep in the cuddle-curl position etc.

We have a Next2Me but despite weeks of trying, DD will not sleep in it. I can put her in it when she's already asleep, and on a good night she might stay asleep for an hour, but as soon as she stirs she realises she's not with me in the bed and yells until I take her in with me. I even tried a Sleepyhead in the Next2Me, thinking that it might help, but it doesn't matter - she still wakes up and wants to be with me.

At six months my first DD was transferred to a cot in her own room and it was easy - she was happy and that was that. I just don't understand how I can get this baby to feel secure and happy enough to sleep in the Next2Me, never mind a cot.

What should I do? I'd be so grateful for advice.

Can baby roll yet? When my ds hit 6 months I started trying his day naps on his tummy so I could keep an eye. Made his sleep so much better so I started doing it at night too. I know guidance says not til they are one but after assessing all of the risks and the fact that he could roll, I was ok with it.

Hi - no, she's not quite there yet; in fact I would say she's slightly behind where my first DD was in relation to development - she's nowhere near sitting unsupported, not rolling, and a lot clingier! I don't think we'll be starting weaning properly just yet as I can't position her well in the high chair.

@enneagram test Here are a few suggestions that might help:

Gradual Transition: Start by placing the Next2Me crib right next to your bed so that your baby can still feel your presence. Over time, you can gradually move the crib farther away from your bed, giving your baby the opportunity to get used to sleeping in her own space.

Familiar Scents: Place a piece of your clothing or a small cloth with your scent on it in the crib. This can provide comfort and familiarity for your baby.

Establishing a Routine: Create a consistent bedtime routine that signals to your baby that it's time to sleep. This could include activities like a warm bath, gentle rocking, or reading a bedtime story.

Have you tried her in another room? My first v clingy DD was the same and it was like because she knew I was right there, it would make her worse if that makes sense? She was much better further away where she couldn't smell the milk as it's basically a reflex then to get as close to the boob as possible! A little bit of gentle sleep training in her own room might be worth a try. I did the whole go in every couple of minutes thing as like I said, if I stayed near her she would be worse!

Thank you both very much for your replies.

@LiamHellen unfortunately DD won't even sleep in the Next2Me, which is currently attached to the bed - I slide her in there when she falls asleep, but then she wakes up and cries when she realises she's not in the bed with me, and I have to feed her to sleep again, then slide her back into the Next2Me, she wakes up crying, and repeat . . .

Haven't tried putting clothing that smells of me in the Next2Me, I'll try stretching a t-shirt or something over the mattress, see if that helps.

I did wonder if cold turkey might be the way to go, @User415373 - certainly worth a try. Although I'll have to do some research on sleep training as she's still very small, can't imagine I'd want to leave her crying.

Part of me is thinking that she's happy as we are, I'm happy as we are (well, kind-of), so if bedsharing is working at the moment, maybe I shouldn't rush to change it.

Ah I loved my co-sleeping days. If you're both happy, and you are managing to get some sleep, then just carry on with what works. Both of mine were in bed with me for at least 6 months until they started to get too wriggly 🤣 and the bed sharing made no difference - people tried to tell me I'd made a rod for own back but I personally think all the 'practice' of sleeping really well with me helped them do it when it was time to go to their own rooms! I had 0 luck with next 2 me, was used for muslin and nappy storage!