My nearly 3 year old has never been a good sleeper, and I've read hundreds of forums of other desperate parents, but most threads aren't updated with what ended up helping. Here's what has actually helped with us -
Baby stage
- Ibuprofen for teething - every new tooth brought a week or so of broken sleep. Ibuprofen was MUCH more helpful than Calpol. If your baby or toddler is waking in the night when they weren't previously, I'd recommend trying ibuprofen to see if it's teething pain
- Stopping breastfeeding. I know this is controversial. I stopped breastfeeding at 9 months and sleep got much better
- Leave them for a few minutes before going in to see if they settle themselves. Often they will!
- Sleep training at 6 months. It was awful at the time but helped. We went in after 5 mins, then after 10, then 10 more. By this point she was asleep. It took 2 days of this and then she slept much better, only waking to feed once per night. I'm not sure I'd do this again TBH but I was desperate at the time
- If you're not comfortable sleep training, do try helping your child learn to fall asleep on their own as they get a bit older if you're comfortable with it. This doesn't have to involve crying. You can sit in the room next to them where they can see you while they fall asleep on their own. If your child is always rocked to sleep, they may not be able to fall asleep when you're not there to rock them. There is tons of advice out there about this, but the general idea is for them not to need your intervention for them to fall asleep, whether that's being rocked, stroked, sung to, fed, etc.
Toddler stage
- A nightlight - as soon as she could communicate with us, we figured out she was scared of the dark. This helped a lot.
- A sleepsack to stay warm if your child has a hard time keeping their blanket on
- Again, ibuprofen. If your child normally sleeps well and unexpectedly wakes in the night, I'd try ibuprofen.
- Letting them sleep in your room - again, not for everyone, but she's older now and having nightmares and for me personally, I feel cruel forcing her to sleep on her own when she's scared.
- DO NOT fall into the habit of giving them a bottle of milk when they wake in the night - it's hard to break!
- A weighted blanket has helped too. She has a hard time switching off and I think the weight is calming for her. These are not recommended for babies or young toddlers! We just bought one a few weeks ago and she's nearly 3 and big for her age.
- For older toddler nightmares, try a dream catcher or special stuffed animal. Explain to them that the dream catcher/stuffed animal keeps nightmares away. Talk to them about nightmares and explain that they're not real.
Other
- Try switching to lactose-free or non-dairy milk. Since doing this, our daughter no longer wakes crying at around 10pm. She had a cup of normal milk the other day and woke up with stomach pain, so I think she has a mild lactose intolerance
- Keep a consistent bedtime routine and bedtime, and don't allow screens within an hour of bedtime
Our daughter is still not a fantastic sleeper so I don't have a magic solution, but all of these have helped us.