still feeding your over one year old to sleep ?

[tomps]

Not much success so far with my 'no tears' approach to sleep training, as my 13 month old dd refuses to be comforted by me without me getting a tit out. All those books suggest that she will NOT just grow out of this - can anyone out there prove them wrong ? Do you still feed your toddler to sleep ? Did you feed your toddler to sleep as long as it was required and s/he just grew out of it ? Or will I be forced to join the 'cry it out' club ? All tips gratefully received - cheers.

Thanks everyone for the reassurance. jasper, I have to say my dd doesn't want just a short feed though. She doesn't even seem hungry. She's usually on my breast as long as I let her, and most of the time fights very hard if I take it off. So she ends up sucking almost the whole night. This is what I'm afraid she won't grow out of and will have to let her cry when she's older, and it will be even more difficult for her then.

Anyway, we've decided to put her in her crib this last couple days. She still wakes up as often as before (6-7 times a night), but is ok with 10-20 min feeds and I can put her back in her crib. Just even more tiring for me coz I have to stay awake but I feel that it's good that she can sleep 1-2 hours without anything in her mouth. Will try this for a while and see how it goes.

tomps, I hope your dd is still sleeping 9 hours. Good for you!! Does she usually go off to sleep with a quick feed or a very long one like mine does?

Oh dear. Sleeping has gone rapidly down hill. No nap today at all (only upside being she was in bed asleep at 7.30 tonight). No sleep last night until about 11.30, then had to sleep with me all night because teething and full of cold. She goes from very very sleepy to wide awake without any outside influence. I was wondering last night how I will get her to sleep when no longer b/fing as this is only thing which calms her - she is still bouncing all over the bed 5 minutes before feed. Very very fed up with the whole thing at the moment (sleep problems and general mummyness)- will have to somehow 'train' her to get to sleep on her own but just don't know where to start.

Just joining in here. Maybe it depends on the baby. DS1 was breastfed until 13 months when he just stopped. He just had a drink of water from a cup after bath time and very settled really well. DS2 (now approaching 13 months) is a different story. He still boobies to sleep (although if I'm not around he will go down eventually after a lot of screaming). if he wakes during the night I bring him into bed with me and he snuggles down and goes back to sleep, but will not settle in his cot. The main difference between the 2 boys? DS1 always loved his cot and would play in there quite happily and obviously found it a secure place to be. DS2 has always hated it from the moment he was born. Personally I think it's becuase after he was born he was shoved in an incubator for 12 hours- I think he's still sulking I'm hoping he'll give up of his own accord sometime in the next 6 months but we'll see......

I really wanted to leave it up to dd to give up b/f but have decided it's time to do it Too many difficult bedtimes and early mornings. Too many missed naps. Too many backaches from stupid b/f positions trying to coax dd back off to sleep ! I'm a bit sad, but she needs to learn how to get to sleep herself and she won't be able to while still b/f. And hopefully she'll eat more proper food during the day too. Thanks all for advice. See you on giving up breastfeeding thread !

tomps - have you asked your dh/dp to help out. My dd will sometimes sleep if my dh cuddles her. She doesn't always need boobie to sleep. Seems like the sleep is the problem rather than the b/feeding. Would be a shame to give it up if you and dd don't really want to ... and remember all the benefits it provides. Babies of this age still need a lot of comfort. Have you thought about how you are going to replace the comfort? B/feeding might be a pain at times but is there an alternative?

What about putting her in the car/pram for daytime naps?
All the best in any case.

dh definitely willing to help but often needs to be up v early for work so can't / won't ask too much of him. He has got her to sleep in the past though. I know what you mean about comfort, but it doesn't always comfort her enough to get off to sleep, and then we're both stuck ! Will give her milk from bottle/cup and snuggle off to sleep - she has gone to sleep with me before in this way. And in fact the nicest thing is that she's now 'old enough' to come to me and cuddle me and give me a kiss of her own accord, which is lovely and I think means she can get comfort from me when she wants rather than just at bedtime. She hasn't had boobie in the day for the past 3 days now and hasn't even noticed - quite happily drinking milk from a cup. So I think it's an OK time for us both. thanks so much for your best wishes.

dh is actually dp - I'm obviously confused as he bought me gorgeous Yeo Valley Pot au Chocolat for treats !

yuyee, reading your message brouhgt back memories of me feeling like a zombie! My daughter would only fall asleep on the breast and would waken when I tried to take her off so i spent most of my nights with her on my breast! I was always told to carry on feeding her on demand and then when she turned 6 months I was told to stop! Like it would be as simple as that. When she got to 13 months my body could take no more so with the help of my mum and sister I got her off night feeds. I had to stay away from her during the night and she would kick and fight anyone who tried to comfort her. After a week of this things improved greatly and she ate much better in the day too. She has never been a good sleeper though and even now when she is 5 will still get up at least once during the night. What always amazes me though is that she is at her best in the mornings, like a little bird! While i have trouble surfacing!

Hello there, I see this post was many years ago and wanted to know how it ended for you? I have a 17month old who is still doing a bfeed before bed and often falls asleep this way. He wakes sometimes once in the early hours. He's never taken to a bottle or dummy and at the moment will not be consoled by daddy at bedtime will just want me for boob. For the day time feeds he completely weaned himself. X

@tomps 13 month old will now be 20 years old and possibly away at university. You might get more responce starting a new thread of your own BeeThakore

@BeeThakore such an interesting thread to read as I’m still bfing my 14 month old to sleep and during the night. I didn’t realise the date until quite late on, amazing that these little babies will now be grown adults!! An update would be lovely!! Fingers crossed my LO stops soon as I would love more sleep and he wakes up a fair bit, but I’m sure I’ll be sad not getting the extra cuddles when he does!

Wow - this thread is nearly 20 years old which is when I joined Mumsnet and it is lovely to see the names Mears and Jasper again, happy memories.

But how on earth do these old threads resurface? .

I was hoping to hear how it turned out! A bit of a long shot I guess. Thank you

I guess because parents are still having the same experiences and looking for reassurance just the same!

Same problem here with my 17mo. 😣 help!

Same problem here with my one year old 21 years later 🤣