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Sleep

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Original poster

Nearly 2yr old screaming til sick at night

9 replies

Q2C4 · 12/12/2023 22:41

I have a nearly 2 year old who has never been a good sleeper but who screams herself hysterical at bedtime (which goes on for ages) and/or in the middle of the night when she can be up for 2-3 hours, and is often sick as a result. I’ve tried asking my GP for help but they say they don’t help with sleep issues. I'm exploring sleep consultant options. Can anyone recommend anything else that I could try?

OP posts:

DGPP · 12/12/2023 22:43

What have you tried? Do you cuddle her back to sleep? Does she come into your bed if really distressed? Does a drink or food or anything calm her down.
sorry, this sounds awful

Original poster

Q2C4 · 13/12/2023 05:44

We start off by changing her nappy if required, offering her milk if she wants it, cuddling her & trying to keep the whole thing calm, quiet, low lighting etc. Sometimes she stays sleepy and will be back to sleep in her cot in under an hour but other times she decides she wants to get up and go downstairs to play and that is when the trouble starts. She is so determined she can work herself into a frenzy & that is when she gets hysterical and is sick.

OP posts:

whyamiawakestill · 13/12/2023 05:49

When she wants to play has she been downstairs with tv on or iPad etc?

Mine used to want to be back downstairs with us at that age, so we'd be sure to switch everything off and just make downstairs as boring as bed.

Is she getting time away from a device before bed? So she's not crying to go back to something or overtired?

Assuming you've moved her bedtime earlier as well to see if she's overtired? Again we did this with our youngest he was 8pm same as his brother but in fact 7pm suited him much better.

Just some thoughts, I'm not an expert but good luck.

GreatGateauxsby · 13/12/2023 05:59

i am a pro sleep training but this sounds awful…

From what you write you aren’t leaving her to cry and you are always with her when this happens…is that right?
so is she essentially having a tantrum because she can’t play downstairs???

based on guidance we were given

i never offer a nappy change at night with my 20m old - does yours actually need it? Nappy change would wake my dd up more…
If she won’t settle I offer water in a straw cup after 30mins and if it’s been over an hour & / or i’m desperate milk (but I hate doing it and it’s a last resort as they then wake for it)
if she wants to sing / fart about with stuffed toys / “read” a book etc that’s cool

as a question: why does your DD think / know going downstairs is an option? Our dd “knows” you are in your room until morning. Stairgate is opened and that means it’s breakfast time!

BackToRealMe · 13/12/2023 06:21

It was a long time ago now but I used to stat in my children's bedroom until they fell asleep. It was exhausting as hell but nighttimes are scary as a child.
I moved myself out very gradually, from being by their beds to being at the end of the room, top of the stairs etc.

Caspianberg · 13/12/2023 06:26

My 3 year old does this. If he’s left alone he will hold breathe and vomit quickly.

We ditched cot before 2 years as it stressed him out so much being trapped. And they either dh or I sit with him in his room or we just let him come in our room and fall asleep in our bed and then carry him back to his once asleep now. It’s far less stressful and I just read on phone or kindle next to him whilst he settles ( can take 30-60+ minutes for him to fall asleep). But not screaming himself into a full on hyperventilating within minutes like he used to.

Original poster

Q2C4 · 13/12/2023 10:03

GreatGateauxsby · 13/12/2023 05:59

i am a pro sleep training but this sounds awful…

From what you write you aren’t leaving her to cry and you are always with her when this happens…is that right?
so is she essentially having a tantrum because she can’t play downstairs???

based on guidance we were given

i never offer a nappy change at night with my 20m old - does yours actually need it? Nappy change would wake my dd up more…
If she won’t settle I offer water in a straw cup after 30mins and if it’s been over an hour & / or i’m desperate milk (but I hate doing it and it’s a last resort as they then wake for it)
if she wants to sing / fart about with stuffed toys / “read” a book etc that’s cool

as a question: why does your DD think / know going downstairs is an option? Our dd “knows” you are in your room until morning. Stairgate is opened and that means it’s breakfast time!

Edited

We don't leave her to cry, one of us stays in the room with her. Once she has decided she wants to get out of her room & go downstairs / faff about, nothing shifts the idea from her head. I end up sitting with my back to the door to keep it shut (she can open it herself). She gets more & more wound up, then hysterical, then 🤮. It's pretty grim.

OP posts:

GreatGateauxsby · 13/12/2023 10:22

😖 that sounds rough....

Do you think if there were toys in the bedroom she'd stay up there?

If not, I think I would try and find a really good sleep consultant/night nanny that will actually come to you be with you over the course of the night and can see it in action and support you.

Original poster

Q2C4 · 15/12/2023 08:14

We've tried toys in her bedroom - she's just one of those kids who literally never stops moving. She can be all tired and sleepy, cuddling up on my lap & yawning, next thing I know she's got down & is running around her room. She is currently getting less than 9hrs sleep per day, which includes naps. Looking into a sleep consultant.

OP posts:

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