20 month old will not sleep at all

[Tiredmum98]

My daughter is 20 Months old and has always been a difficult sleeper but the last couple of months have just gotten so much worse. She will literally scream and scream. It’s taking on average 3-4 hours to get her to sleep at night plus her waking in the night.
we've tried white noise, lullabies, she has a dummy, won’t take to a comfort item, she has a routine, I’ve taken her to the doctor who said there isn’t anything physically wrong but they prescribed a short term sedative that actually worked but ran out.
the lack of sleep is affecting the entire house, I sometimes have to sleep on the floor next to her cot which is now killing my back and hips, my eldest who’s 3 who shares a room is getting broken sleep when she stays in their room but if she gets in my bed, my partner then has to move to the sofa which then he isn’t sleeping well and is effecting him with work.
We’re all beyond tired and I’m genuinely out of ideas. This has gone on way too long to be a sleep regression she just seems to hate sleep. I’ve tired every sleep training method you can name, she just ends up making herself sick from being left alone, even for 5 minutes. I’m just at my end with this, I have another doctor appointment this week and I’ve had sleep leaflets emailed by the HV but not much else.
Has anyone got any advice at all. I don’t know if she has a problem producing melatonin, a form of childhood insomnia or just something underlying. She’s now having constant tantrums from the lack of sleep but nothing we’re going is working! Please help!!!

Hi OP, sorry you’re going through this, sleep deprivation is no joke! I myself sleep trained and thankfully it worked a treat for us, but I’d be seriously cautious about sedating a 1 year old.. although I do understand you are feeling under an immense amount of pressure.

Have you considered hiring a sleep consultant? I don’t know anything about the costs or whether it’s in your budget but it sounds like the outlay could be a good investment for your entire family.

Does she settle when she’s in your bed? If a sleep consultant isn’t in the budget, I’d just stick a single bed in little ones room for DH and co-sleep in your bed with baby.

Sending hugs 💐

Thankyou for the lovely message! She was prescribed Phenagen, the travel sickness stuff that makes you drowsy, we spaced it out better and smaller than prescribed but eventually ran out 😅
Ive tired her in my bed, a travel cot, turning her cot into a bed, she just won’t have it. I didn’t know sleep consultants were a thing, I’d love to look into that but I don’t think it’s in the budget atm 😂 We did sleep train her from 6/7 months old but for the last 3/4 months she’s reverted back to being like a newborn but worse! Currently writing this laid next to her cot while i hope she drifts off🤞🏻

Yes, definitely look into a sleep consultant

There are lots of threads on here about sleep consultants if you are interested. SC likely won’t tell you anything you don’t already know but perhaps having someone else present who isn’t emotionally invested will give you confidence.

Is your DD otherwise well? My DM always recants how my Dsis didn’t sleep a wink for 4 years. She was eventually diagnosed with a chronic stomach illness which my DM thinks may have been linked to troubled sleep, although there were lots of other signs (bad reflux etc). Not to worry you of course, I can reassure you my Dsis is fine, in her 20’s and my DM now thinks she sleeps too much 😆.

Routine and sleep consultant

Magnesium is helpful for sleep. Weve had terrible trouble with my daughter getting to sleep and its really helped.

I have another appointment with the doctor on Thursday so I’ll bring that up! I’m also asking about melatonin but I don’t think they can give it to toddlers. Just wish she’d sleep 😂