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Sleep

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Original poster

Baby waking 10-11 times every night

11 replies

baz12 · 03/12/2023 06:34

Hiya:)

I'm in desperate need of advise/tips/suggestions before I start pulling my hair out. My little boy will not sleep. As a new born he was fairly good and would sleep for 4 hours at a time. However since about 3/4 months it's gone down hill. He's been waking 10-11 times a night. Is there anything that has really worked for anyone?

I'm worried he's in pain so I havnt tried controlled crying it out yet. He was a really refluxey newborn so I have a concern he's still having this- taking him to the gp on Monday. He's breast fed and does comfort on me. However recently even when I let him do this (which I try not to and am good until about 4am normally) it just doesn't help anymore

He has a structured day time routine and naps really well in his cot three times a day (2x 1 hour and 1x 45 mins) on his own without using breast feeding as comfort

ANY suggestion is appreciated 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

OP posts:

SutWytTi · 03/12/2023 06:50

It is very common for babies to change their sleep patterns a lot. The thing with babies is everything is changing both internally and externally all the time.

Are you saying you don't let him feed in the night? I would assume then he is hungry. Bear in mind how much his brains developing and also how much he needs both the comfort and the calories.

So step one is feed him to see if he stops wanting food.

ShirleyPhallus · 03/12/2023 07:00

How old is he?

GoingOffOnATangent · 03/12/2023 07:03

He is still very young to be expected to go all night without a feed!
I know you hear of babies who do, but there the exception not the rule.
I would let him feed when he wakes, the effects are multiple including feelings of safety and comfort as well as a full warm tummy, so may make a significant positive difference.

kiwimelonlime · 03/12/2023 07:12

My DC was exactly the same OP, I thought I would lose my mind from tiredness! Have you got a Next - to - Me Cot? I found that easier! It does get better honestly but for Us, it was essentially through the night cluster feeding! As they get older Co-sleeping helped a lot

Original poster

baz12 · 03/12/2023 07:29

SutWytTi · 03/12/2023 06:50

It is very common for babies to change their sleep patterns a lot. The thing with babies is everything is changing both internally and externally all the time.

Are you saying you don't let him feed in the night? I would assume then he is hungry. Bear in mind how much his brains developing and also how much he needs both the comfort and the calories.

So step one is feed him to see if he stops wanting food.

No no, I'm defo feeding him!!! I'm just not letting him comfort. So I let him latch and feed, then unlatch him when he's done or he will just be on me all night

OP posts:

Original poster

baz12 · 03/12/2023 07:30

ShirleyPhallus · 03/12/2023 07:00

How old is he?

He's 7 months

OP posts:

Original poster

baz12 · 03/12/2023 07:33

GoingOffOnATangent · 03/12/2023 07:03

I am feeding him! I haven't made that very clear 🤦🏼‍♀️ all I mean is if I don't unlatch him he will just stay there all night. So I'm making sure I unlatch him when he stop actively feeding. Other than at 4am when I'm knackered and desperate

OP posts:

Greensaber · 03/12/2023 07:36

Has he got a dummy? I introduced a dummy for this reason as dd would just want to comfort feed the entire night and neither of us would sleep. Life saver!

pinksavannah · 03/12/2023 07:40

Have you tried solids yet?

I would say it's sleep regression, but not if it's been going on for 3/4 months?

ShirleyPhallus · 03/12/2023 07:41

Ok, so the issue you have is that he’s got a strong feed / sleep association. Whenever he goes to sleep, he’s feeding, so when he wakes up he expects that again. You need to break that.

you can do some gentle sleep training - try replacing the feeds with a dummy (keep one feed a night though) or you could try shushing and patting him instead, or rocking him in his cot.

the quickest way would be to do controlled crying where you leave him to cry a few mins at a time, you’d need to do a dream feed at 10pm or so (ie feed him when he’s asleep so he’s not confused that you feed him sometimes when he wakes but not others), it’s hard to hear them cry but he will be sleeping through in a few nights

at 7 months their stomachs are big enough to go a long stretch without needing a feed but it’s just about breaking that association

GoingOffOnATangent · 03/12/2023 09:24

baz12 · 03/12/2023 07:33

Show quote history

Oooohhhh. Gotcha.
You would be desperate by then!
I had one like this who was a great sleeper at first but went through a long awful phase of waking me often. I was getting two hours total sleep in ten minute slots! How I survived I do not know.
Mine wasn't caused by wanting endless feeding though, I never did get to the bottom of it and I really tried to solve it. In the end time sorted it out. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy though!
I agree with pp it is worth trying to break his reliance on feeding at night. BUT it will get worse before it gets better, so choose your timing well.
Think about daytime support you could rope in. Can you research methods, make a plan you think it's worth trying and involve your family so they can be around to help in the day as much as possible so you aren't doing total 24hr care? When would be a good time to try that?
Once you've got your plan, stick to it even if it doesn't seem to help at first, as chopping and changing strategies too quickly doesn't help make new habits. You need a decent run at it.

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