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Two children = no sleep for mum!!

3 replies

Eststarr · 04/11/2023 06:30

Hi all,
I literally haven’t had a proper nights sleep in 9 months.
I have an almost 4 year old boy and a 9 month old girl. My boy used to be a great sleeper before his sister came along… used to sleep 7-7. But now wakes up at least once a night screaming and then wakes around 5:30 and doesn’t go back to sleep. My little girl mostly sleeps ok, wakes once for a feed, but is currently in a sleep regression and wakes for like 1-1.5 hours at a time at the moment.
I feel like the universe is against me and whenever one has a good night, the other has a terrible night. If my little boy actually sleeps through, his sister will wake for hours. If the baby sleeps through with one wake up, my boy will shout through 3-4 times that night.
maybe worth mentioning as well, that if I don’t rush in to my 4yo when he shouts in the night, then he wakes up the baby, who then doesn’t go back to sleep. So I run into him like a sprinter each time.
I am literally a zombie. I’ve sleep-trained both of them, and feel there is no more I can do.
ive worked with sleep therapists but nothing has helped.
currently lying in bed… my night has gone: baby woke from 11-12:30am, then 4yo woke up screaming at 2am wanting me to “tuck him in”, then baby woke at 5:20 wide awake and is not going back to sleep (currently 6:25) my 4yo woke too and is now downstairs.

Any help, or advice would be much appreciated. I’m back to work and just surviving on empty. At my wits end.

OP posts:
GotMooMilk · 04/11/2023 06:33

I’m so sorry the tiredness in parenting is honestly the worst part for me.
Things will get better. They will grow up and sleep will settle. Persevere as you are, continue with routine and use the sleep specialists. It sounds like you’re a single parent maybe? Do you have a relative who could do a night with them so you can get one solid sleep to catch up(“?

Itsallok · 04/11/2023 06:34

No partner I take it. Keep being consistent and tough. Changing routines makes it worse

Sunset6 · 04/11/2023 06:55

I have two of similar ages (5yo and 13m) and have had similar challenges! Many wake-ups are unavoidable but you can definitely change some things to stop everyone disturbing each other. If the baby is in your room, might be time to move them out to their own room. We have a white noise machine in with baby which helps prevent him being disturbed by noise from elsewhere. Close doors to stop noise carrying. If baby gets up early, take her downstairs quickly to avoid disturbing the older one. If you can keep the older one shielded from noise there’s no reason why they shouldn’t go back to sleeping through, and your 9m old will soon be dropping the night feed and sleeping better in general as they develop so quickly at this age. Good luck!

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