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Original poster

Help with getting 22m old to self settle

10 replies

Chans11 · 04/10/2023 19:02

Hi

my 22m old occasionally self settles but most of the time we hold to sleep and transfer but this is becoming more difficult the bigger she is getting. she had a really bad stomach bug which has affected her sleep so i have no idea on where to start with helping her to self settle as she has ended up in our bed the past few nights. Any tips appreciated

OP posts:
crostini · 04/10/2023 20:32

Has she got her own big girl bed yet? If not, make a huge deal out of how cool and exciting it is and get bedding with her favorite character on it. Then read to her until she falls asleep. It might take a longgggg time a first, but it's the first step away from holding/rocking/feeding to sleep.

Original poster
Chans11 · 05/10/2023 06:34

Hi no she is still in a cot at the moment, was unsure when to change to a bed tbh as ive heard so many different things!

OP posts:
Rachaelc1981 · 05/10/2023 11:30

My 2.5 year old is exactly the same and is still in a cot. I’m desperate to get him to stay asleep in his bed. He has to fall asleep in my arms then I can transfer into cot. He stays asleep for a few hours then wakes up. Trouble is he’s in our room and I’m so conscious of waking my husband up trying to settle son so I let him fall asleep on me then back to bed. Hope you get your little girl sorted.

Original poster
Chans11 · 05/10/2023 22:55

It is so hard! My daughter usually sleeps ok but it seems to be getting worse and have no idea whether getting her in a cot bed would help but I might have to try it

OP posts:
SeaToSki · 05/10/2023 23:01

Can she climb out of her cot? If not, then take advantage to develop her self settling skills as when they realise they can jump out of a bed, you are usually in for a couple of weeks of footsteps on the stairs every ten mins at bed time.

I would put her in the cot drowsy, but not asleep and then sit by the cot while she falls asleep (ignore the fussing) but hold her hand if you want. Repeat for a week, or until she goes to sleep easily like this

then move the chair to the other side of the room and repeat until its an easy bedtime
then sit in the hall with the door ajar
then just leave the door ajar and bustle about upstairs
then either go downstairs with the door ajar, or close the door

Rachaelc1981 · 05/10/2023 23:21

SeaToSki · 05/10/2023 23:01

Can she climb out of her cot? If not, then take advantage to develop her self settling skills as when they realise they can jump out of a bed, you are usually in for a couple of weeks of footsteps on the stairs every ten mins at bed time.

I would put her in the cot drowsy, but not asleep and then sit by the cot while she falls asleep (ignore the fussing) but hold her hand if you want. Repeat for a week, or until she goes to sleep easily like this

then move the chair to the other side of the room and repeat until its an easy bedtime
then sit in the hall with the door ajar
then just leave the door ajar and bustle about upstairs
then either go downstairs with the door ajar, or close the door

I know it’s not my post but I might steal your idea ! My son is 2.5 years old with similar issues so I think I might try this. Thank you

Original poster
Chans11 · 06/10/2023 10:15

Will give this again thank you..did try a few months ago and she just cried and cried!

OP posts:
crostini · 06/10/2023 15:50

Chans11 · 05/10/2023 06:34

Hi no she is still in a cot at the moment, was unsure when to change to a bed tbh as ive heard so many different things!

It definitely depends on the child I think. We changed our eldest to a normal single bed, at 23 months, just with a small bed rail from Amazon but she's never fallen out.

I think bedtime in a bed is much easier than a cot because they can fully see you and chat/cuddle etc during the bedtime process, so I think they accept to process more, than being put into a cot awake.

Original poster
Chans11 · 07/10/2023 23:22

Thats exactly what i’m thinking! She falls asleep instantly whilst i’m sitting up laying next to me in bed but just hates it when placed in the cot awake

OP posts:
TheShellBeach · 07/10/2023 23:24

Get the Ferber sleep training book.

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