Newborn will only sleep on me during the day

Hannouck · 2023-09-13T10:41:12+00:00

I have a 4 week old that suddenly refused to sleep in her bed during the day (started a few days ago). She used to be absolutely fine in her bed day and night, now during the day she would not settle in her bed (either she keeps her eyes open until she gets overtired or falls asleep and wakes up after 5 min). But she is absolutely fine during the night! From 8pm until 5am she is happy sleeping in her bed. No idea why, and wondering if you experienced something similar? I completely get that their are tiny humans trying to deal with their new world, but I cannot get anything done, even just going to the toilets is a challenge 😬 So just wondering if it sort itself out with time? I've tried a a sling and a carrier and she absolutely hates them. She screams every time I've tried putting her in them, so this isn't a solution either :/

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Astromelia · 13/09/2023 11:46

Babies are always changing, unfortunately. As soon as you feel you know what you’re doing it changes and you have to catch up!

This is quite normal, my first was the same. I used to make the bed safe and nap with her. Eventually she would also sleep in the pram or the car, or the sling once I’d persisted for a while.

thelma57 · 13/09/2023 12:00

My (almost) 10 week old is the same but at night too 😭 I can trick her into the cot for 45 mins tops and normally only a couple of times a night, and she’s on me all day. It’s a lot, especially now DH is at work.

It is just a phase though and some babies just need more comfort or at least that’s what I keep telling myself so I don’t die…

Original poster

Hannouck · 13/09/2023 12:30

thelma57 · 13/09/2023 12:00

My (almost) 10 week old is the same but at night too 😭 I can trick her into the cot for 45 mins tops and normally only a couple of times a night, and she’s on me all day. It’s a lot, especially now DH is at work.

It is just a phase though and some babies just need more comfort or at least that’s what I keep telling myself so I don’t die…

That must be so so tough! I'm already going insane just for the day... So can't even imagine having to deal with this at night too!

I'm sure they'll grow out of it very soon though 🙏🏼

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Original poster

Hannouck · 13/09/2023 12:31

Astromelia · 13/09/2023 11:46

Babies are always changing, unfortunately. As soon as you feel you know what you’re doing it changes and you have to catch up!

This is quite normal, my first was the same. I used to make the bed safe and nap with her. Eventually she would also sleep in the pram or the car, or the sling once I’d persisted for a while.

Yes hopefully she'll grow out of it soon! She won't even sleep unless held, not even next to me or in the pram...

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FurryGiraffe · 13/09/2023 12:34

Neither of my two would sleep in a cot during the day for longer than a few minutes. Naps had to be in my arms, in the pram (but only if moving) or car (again, only if moving). It improved as they got older and consolidated their naps but I think it was about 6 months for both of them before they'd sleep in a cot. Very happy in the cot at night though.

Olivia199 · 13/09/2023 12:37

Mine was similar (and don't worry, by 8 months was happily sleeping in her cot) and honestly the best advice I got was to roll with it. I used to go to the loo, grab snacks and a drink and get the TV going with something good and then just settle in. It was frustrating when it came to getting housework etc done and I LOVED cot naps when they started, but it also formed some totally uninterrupted time of rest and I started quite appreciating that! Everything ends with children, good and bad, so whenever you're in a spot that you're finding tricky, just remember this! (And when you're in the sweet spot try not to think too much about how it'll all go to pot again soon...!)

RedPandaFluff · 13/09/2023 15:54

I'm experiencing something similar with my almost five-week-old and I'm knackered. If she's sleeping deeply, I can put her in her Moses basket, but she'll stir a few minutes later and demand to be held again. Same during the night - I'm getting maybe twenty minutes sleep in every two-hour cycle of feeding, holding upright due to reflux, put her in the Next2Me, I get a few minutes sleep, she wakes up furious and we start again.

It's so tough. And this house is a bloody mess

fearfuloffluff · 13/09/2023 15:59

I used to have somewhere to put the baby in each room - a mat, sleepyhead thing, bouncer etc so I could stick the baby in there. Helps with going to the loo etc.

Never minded newborn sleeping on me but maybe I would have if they had refused to go in the sling.

SouthLondonMum22 · 13/09/2023 16:06

Mine went through a couple phases of this when he was tiny and he also hated baby carriers which made it even more tricky. If I needed the toilet, to get a drink etc then I would leave him to grizzle but other than that, I would just spend a lot of time putting him down when awake but sleepy to teach him how to go sleep by himself and it would pass eventually.

Original poster

Hannouck · 13/09/2023 16:09

RedPandaFluff · 13/09/2023 15:54

I'm experiencing something similar with my almost five-week-old and I'm knackered. If she's sleeping deeply, I can put her in her Moses basket, but she'll stir a few minutes later and demand to be held again. Same during the night - I'm getting maybe twenty minutes sleep in every two-hour cycle of feeding, holding upright due to reflux, put her in the Next2Me, I get a few minutes sleep, she wakes up furious and we start again.

It's so tough. And this house is a bloody mess

I feel you! Just the day for me is a nightmare so I'm already glad she's ok at night...

Mine also has reflux, she was put on Omeprazole but it did nothing. Today we started Hip Anti Reflux formula and it seems to have done the trick for her reflux which already helps with the screaming!

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Original poster

Hannouck · 13/09/2023 16:09

fearfuloffluff · 13/09/2023 15:59

I used to have somewhere to put the baby in each room - a mat, sleepyhead thing, bouncer etc so I could stick the baby in there. Helps with going to the loo etc.

Never minded newborn sleeping on me but maybe I would have if they had refused to go in the sling.

Yes I would love for her to be ok with the sling! I'll try again...

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Original poster

Hannouck · 13/09/2023 16:11

SouthLondonMum22 · 13/09/2023 16:06

Mine went through a couple phases of this when he was tiny and he also hated baby carriers which made it even more tricky. If I needed the toilet, to get a drink etc then I would leave him to grizzle but other than that, I would just spend a lot of time putting him down when awake but sleepy to teach him how to go sleep by himself and it would pass eventually.

Yeah I have to let her scream when prepping a bottle or going to the loo cause I have no choice!

Hopefully it'll pass as she grows up, she was born at 38 weeks so she's just a tiny human...

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strugglemama · 18/09/2023 11:33

Have you tried persevering with the sling? Mine cried when first putting in, but would quickly settle and go to sleep once he was in and I started to move around. I practically lived with a baby strapped on to me for the first 6 months of his life as he wouldn't be put down! He still loves a nap in the carrier at 14 months old (but my back doesn't!)

Original poster

Hannouck · 18/09/2023 12:16

strugglemama · 18/09/2023 11:33

Have you tried persevering with the sling? Mine cried when first putting in, but would quickly settle and go to sleep once he was in and I started to move around. I practically lived with a baby strapped on to me for the first 6 months of his life as he wouldn't be put down! He still loves a nap in the carrier at 14 months old (but my back doesn't!)

Actually little update:

I bought a new sling and persisted with it, she screamed at first but eventually got ok with it. She's not loving it but she's getting used to it.

For the ones struggling with baby reflux as well: I realised that she is ok putting her down to sleep if I let her sleep on her side. It's obviously not safe sleep, so I only do this when I stay next to her during the day, never at night! But it allows me to have free hands too 🙈

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