What do people mean when they say they offer their toddler water?

[Fortgeloveofsleep]

I see loads of people saying that if their toddler wakes in the night, they offer them water (or milk). I don't understand... are they implying their child is awake enough to be able to sit up and drink out of a cup? My 16mo still doesn't STTN by a long shot, but no way could I offer her a drink, she's not awake enough for that.

I find it weird that you think it’s weird that people offer their toddlers a drink in the night if they wake up.

I leave a bottle of water in my 20mo’s bed (and have done since she was 13months). She wakes, drinks, helps herself, doesn’t cry, and then wakes properly in the morning. Initially it was a bottle of mile but in the last month I’ve changed it to water.

Often when people say this, it’s because they’re trying to encourage them not to wake in the night for a milk feed. By offering them water, the hope is that they decide not to bother waking up (!) in the absence of anything more interesting than plain water.

I put a chilled water bottle in the cot before I go to sleep. Child wakes up, drinks it. Prior to that I'd have to assist.

I'd be too worried leaving them alone with a bottle in the night. We just used to give it they woke.

They're trying to discourage their child from waking up expecting milk. Water is far less interesting.

I don't think people are understanding the point of my post... it's not the motive I'm referring to, it's that the child is conscious enough to sit up and drink. My DD still needs resettling numerous times a night, but she is way too confused and delirious when she does to take a drink. That's what I'm confused about because I'm struggling to imagine a situation where I could possibly placate her with water when she's not alert.

Well, obviously theirs are?! Some kids like to party at night 🤷🏻‍♀️

That may be for your child, but plenty are sake and alert enough to sit up and drink. Sometimes when mine wakes she’ll sit up and ask for a drink. She’ll have one and then lie down again and go back to sleep. It’s quite common.

Awake not sake

How many times a night?

Some nights none if she sleeps through, some nights a couple of times. This week during the heatwave a few times as it’s so hot.

Lots of people have toddlers who wake at night. Mine did for ages. She was more than awake enough to drink out of a cup. This is why I am still a zombie, even though she's now six and more or less sleeping through.

Mine did about 2-3 times a night for a bit, especially if it was hot. She'd snap awake like a rocket and be immediately alert, have a drink, go straight back to sleep.

My nephew is like a tiny drunk if he wakes in the night, not coordinated or coherent at all. All kids are different I guess.

So basically your child seeps through without ever totally waking up because you soothe her if she stirs? That’s nice but not common. I have one child who always slept well and the rest who didn’t.

Hey if your DD is not alert enough to sit up and drink as you have said then you really don’t need to do it and it would be of no benefit to you to try because you would only be making her more alert and waking her up more. If she is rousing (rather than fully waking) she is most likely just in between sleep cycles (even adults wake between sleep cycles but we are able to get ourselves back to sleep so might not even remember/realise we woke up) and she is still learning to self soothe herself back to sleep. I think the best think you can do is find the most minimal and un-invasive thing to sooth her and help help get herself back to sleep. Try white noise or gentle rhythmic patting. Only put on a very low night light and don’t take her out of her cot/bed.

When my DD got to this stage of sleep development I tried rhythmic shushing and was surprised to find it worked well. We can both be barely awake, I’ll shush a few times and she will drift off again and then the waking happens less and less. I appreciate it’s as tiring getting up for a one minute wake up as an hour one but this is good because it means your DD is closer to sleeping through than a toddler who is fully awake and asking for a drink.

Im assuming from what you said that DD is weaned and you are looking to reduce the night waking but if you actually mean she is waking for a bf and you want to night wean then here is a link https://llli.org/breastfeeding-info/weaning-how-to/#:~:text=TIPS%20FOR%20SLEEP%20TIME%20WEANING&text=La%20Leche%20League%20does%20not,help%20with%20the%20overnight%20times.

@Fortgeloveofsleep

I don't think people are sitting their children up and giving them a cup, I think it is a bottle with a teat.

@Fortgeloveofsleep mine doesn’t wake up enough if he wakes in the night either. He’s 26 months and stopped having a night feed at 6 months. I do put water next to his bed in this heat but it’s more if he wants it before falling asleep or first thing when he wakes up. As PP said, I think we just have a different experience.

If she's that drowsy when she wakes, I think you should leave her to sette herself back to sleep

It's not "nice" 🤣 not having had more than 3 hours (at a push) of undisturbed sleep since she was born takes a huge toll. That's why I asked, in case somehow other people were getting their half asleep children to take a drink and I'm missing something really obvious

She doesn't. If I leave her it descends into crying, and then into full blown hysterics if I leave her further. I do what gets me the most amount of sleep, even if it's shit quality.

I agree with the others, at 16m I wouldn't be settling her unless she was screaming to be honest. A little shout or cry or moan, I'd wait at least 5 minutes before going through unless she was getting worked up. Even then I wouldn't pick her up, I'd 'ssshhh' and stroke her lying down, and only pick her up in extreme crying.

They need a bit of time and space to learn to settle themselves and go back to sleep if they rouse, just like we do as adults. It's absolutely fine to reassure them and make sure they're not distressed but if she's drowsy and just moaning, no I wouldn't be going in and feeding her or settling her or anything like that.

I don't offer mine a cup of water but where it's been so hot etc and if he wakes, I have her straw cup that bring up and I hold I to her lips and she sips form the straw if she wants some. She doesn't have to be fully with it to do it.

Ok just seen your update, in your situation I'd do Ferber method or similar. But I'm a fan of sleep training, many on MN will tell you it will turn her into a sociopath and ruin her life 🤷🏻‍♀️

Yes, when she wakes (which isn't very often) my 16 month old wakes up enough to drink water if we give her the bottle