Hi, I’m really hoping someone can help me here:
My (almost) 12 month old LG has always been a pretty great night sleeper, even in those very early newborn days.
When she was 5.5 months we moved her to her bed and room, took the dummy and did a modified Ferber sleep training (please do not judge) and she has been sleeping so great on her own since. There may be the odd night where she takes a couple of check-ins to settle or where she may wake in the night and need some reassurance but those have been few and far between, as generally when she’s off to sleep she’ll sleep till morning.
When she turned 10 months we did a month long vacation and she would sleep in a travel cot in our room but was great, I worried it would throw out our routine but she was a dream.
And now this past month since she turned 11 months it’s been ROUGH. For the past 2.5 weeks she would go down within seconds, as usual, but then would wake crying and standing up in her cot within 30-60 min. When I go in and give her a cuddle she would settle immediately and go off to sleep but will inevitably wake up again in 15-60 min. And this would repeat with the constant settling and resetting. After about the 3rd or 4th time we give up and take her to our bed, where she is immediately SO happy to see, she would literally giggle and smile and then go off to sleep. My DH would usually migrate to the sofa as she honestly spreads out so much that when it’s the 3 of us no one sleeps well.
Now, I LOVE the cuddles and cherish this time with her as I know it won’t last forever. I understand she is going through something- leap, regression, separation anxiety. At the same time, I want to sleep with my husband, and I want us all to get some rest. I return to work in 2 weeks and my LG is starting nursery. I know these are HUGE changes and so getting her settled is my first and biggest priority. I know she will miss us and she would probably want to spend time with us during the night and feel close. But I also don’t want to create a rod for my own back here and create bad habits.
So, all of this is to say - can someone more knowledgeable advise me - is this a short-lived phase (the separation anxiety and not wanting to be alone in her room)? Do we just need to ride it out and one day she’ll be back to her usual sleep pattern? Do I just provide her with as much comfort and reassurance and cuddles in the meantime (even if it means her sleeping with me)? Or is it something that I need to be firm on and sort of re-do Ferber or some other type of sleep training, so she gets back on track? I don’t have any guilt doing that by the way, it worked beautifully for us last time and I know that there’s 1-2 bad nights for then long-term gain and everyone sleeps SO much better after. I just want to know if this is behavioral or emotional. If behavioral, then we can work on it, if emotional, then I just want to support her and help her get through it.