Help - 5 month old wake ups - what am I doing wrong

[loopyloutoo]

I'm losing the will to live here!

5 month old has turned into a horrendous sleeper for the last three weeks with no sign of changing - is there anything you could recommend I do? I feel like I'm about to lose it through lack of sleep 😴

Day looks like this usually:

• up for the day around 8.30/9am depending on how the night before went

• generally will go down every two hours or so but since 3 weeks ago every nap is a struggle - will not settle for ages until eventually she is so tired she gets frustrated and falls off to sleep. Generally a nap around 11/2/4.30 ish but she never actually sleeps at this time so it's hard to tell. Nap duration varies no real pattern.

• FF - 7oz bottles every 3-4 hours, no issue with taking them, seems to get "enough"during the day. Before 3 weeks ago we had times where she would sleep from 8pm - 5.30am or 6am. Have tried to give her 8oz bottle before bed but no evidence this has made any difference to night time.

• since she has figured out how to roll on her tummy she now does this in her sleep or when she wakes up during the night. She can't roll back on her back independently, gets stuck and gets frustrated and starts to cry. I have watched her to see if she will fall asleep on tummy with her head to the side, it's happened for a small while then she starts to complain. I have tried to get her to practice rolling from her tummy to back during the day but this is making no difference to her at night time.
  This tummy rolling has instigated the start of bad nights sleep as far as I can recall. Certainly for me, I'm up constantly rolling her back.

*sleeps in a next to me beside me with a purflo sleep tight bed inside (approved for night sleeping) this has comforted her since birth and we've found really made a difference to her quality of sleep initially. She doesn't look too big for it at all so I don't think it's the issue - I took it out to try her sleeping without it and the rolling onto tummy became constant. It's recommended up until 8 months or until the baby can sit up independently I believe.

• I am planning to do up her own room this month so it's ready for 6 months and assemble cot etc - I have wondered am I interrupting her at night and she could be better in on her own, I doubt it but exploring all options at the moment.

• definitely seems to be teething - hand constantly in mouth, v dribbly, wanting to chew everything. Bonjela no difference, I've given Calpol to see if it helps but no, I've just tried teetha granules tonight and she seems to like them but whether they make a difference I don't know.

• for context, husband here but works a safety critical job so on the days he is working, I'll do the night shifts and he sleeps in spare room. He is v good at taking her when home or on days off but it's really getting to me now with lack of sleep.

Sorry for the essay - can anyone please tell me what I'm doing wrong???? I know I should have her on a proper schedule but I really do try - all it takes I find is for her to resist a nap for a while and fall asleep later for it to be all knocked off schedule?!

Any suggestions would be much appreciated 🙏🏻 its now 2.15am and she's woken up turning and twisting, not evidently hungry but I offered her a feed anyway, changed nappy and all fine, now completely awake and looking round her trying to turn 🙈

My heart goes out to you. My once newborns are huge teenagers now and I have to drag them up from sleep. It will pass. Whatever is causing this, it will pass, I promise. It doesn't feel that way to you because you are exhausted and taking on a whole new role! Just try to sleep when the baby sleeps. Sometimes going onto solids at 6 months really helps sleep. Just sending positive vibes and don't despair.

At 5 months id say a nap every 2 hours is too much. My 5 month old naps every 4 hours ish for short 30-45 min naps. Occasionally he will have a big nap of 60-90 mins.

He still wakes at night, im sending this as he stares at me from the crib. Sometimes every 2 hours, in the baby group i attend all the mums experience similar. Its not unusual.

Sleep regression is very common when learning a new skill such as rolling over too.

Sleep routines are fluid and not set in stone. Same as feeding. We all need different amounts of food and sleep on different days. You dont eat if not hungry, you dont sleep if not tired. Babies are the same.

My daughter litterally did not sleep until she was about 6.

The exhaustion is so hard. My first was terrible sleeper, the second seems better so far. From what you say it sounds like your mother's instinct knows what's up, she's teething and has learned to roll. Soon she will learn to roll herself back in her sleep and she will get back to her normal pattern. She's in pain now with her teeth and just wants her mummy comfort. It's hard going for you but it will pass. Try and be kind to yourself, get a break where you can. Remember you are not alone, not far from you is another parent in the night shift!!

We had this a few weeks ago, it was essentially a development leap whilst she sussed out how to roll confidently and then settled down again, but it was seriously tough going at the time, I was averaging about 2hrs sleep a day and genuinely thought I was at breaking point.

Hopefully it’s reassuring to know it’s just a phase and it really will pass. I did plenty of tummy time during the day, along with helping her to roll back over so she could get used to the feeling. For a week or so it felt like we were getting nowhere and then suddenly one day she was like one of those fortune telling fish, rolling all over the place! Once she’d nailed rolling any which way she started to sleep a bit better again.

Going through this exact thing right now - literally

I think it’s hunger, teething, practising rolling and possibly she needs more space so we will move her - she is 6 months

this is our second and I know it will pass - although difficult to be positive during nights like this I know

I would try getting her up earlier (7am) and keeping an eye that her naps arent too long, but unfortunately I think there is often a regression at this stage. I like Lucy Wolfe for routines and sleep ideas.

P.s. no nests are certified for overnight sleep, no matter what Purflo says. The lullaby trust does not recommend them.

It’s classic 4 month sleep regression! I don’t think it’s anything you’re doing this just happens at 4 months just when you think you’ve got things just right!

You’re doing nothing wrong and I don’t think we had a proper routine with DS1 until he was pushing a year old. 4-5 months was the worst sleep regression for us. Lots of tears! We eventually sleep trained at 6 months. Health visitor advised “anything you can do to get through it” including cosleeping and early weaning (which we did at 5.5 months).

Thanks so much to everyone who replied - it's really nice to know I'm not on my own with this problem!

Plenty of tummy time during the day it is - she did sleep soundly on her tummy for a period of time this morning in the next to me minus the purflo bed so I'm hoping she's just a tummy sleeper who will get used to it! Anything for rest. Fingers crossed for all of you experiencing the same ⭐️

Sleep regression probably. Wildly disagree with the poster above who said naps every two hours was too much: even at six months DS can only just manage two hours, he’d be bouncing off the walls with four hours awake.

Getting them up at the same time every day helps with setting a routine. Even if you want to die and you’ve just resettled them at 6.45am and have been up and down all night, get them up at 7 (or whatever time you choose to set your day). But if she was doing well a little while ago, just try to ride it out: coffee, hot showers, fresh air, mountains of chocolate, swearing under your breath when they wake from a nap after 20 minutes.

Sorry to jump on this post almost a year on, but I am having a horrendous time (in terms of sleep) with my five month old daughter. How did things work out in the end?

@Rose1999 jumping on to you ‘jumping on’ 😂 I’m going through this with the our 4.5 month old. Please give me all the advice / knowledge you have if things have gotten better

She's now 8 months and it's worse 🙈🙈

@Rose1999 Oh nooooo!!!! My 4.5 month old will always wake himself up because of it so we’re exhausted. Does your baby girl wake herself up? I’d be absolutely fine ignoring if but I’m literally just laid waiting for him to wake himself up everytime

She was consistently waking 1-2 hourly until about 7/8 months. She then regressed to crying and crying in her cot to the point where she's now in my bed. I'm really really
not happy about it and hoping it's a phase. She's not great in my bed either but she has periods of sleep whereas in my cot she's inconsolable 😔