2yo waking for the day at 3am and climbs out of cot

[Soltanalot]

I posted a few days ago about our sleep woes with our almost 2 year old but things are just getting worse.

DD will be 2 next month. Apart from early wakes she's generally been a good sleeper going to sleep by herself and sleeping through the night. For the past month though she's gotten hysterical if someone isn't in the room with her at bed time and has also been getting up frequently and also getting up for the day at 4am.

in the past week she's started climbing out of her cot too.

This morning, she silently got out of her cot at 2:45am and came to our room. I tried putting her back to sleep in our bed but she wasn't happy so we tried the cot and she went quiet for about 30 mins but has since been crying her head off until 5:30 when we gave up and brought her down.

it can't be hunger as she doesn't want to eat now. She has got a snotty nose but is otherwise ok and she's slept ok with snotty noses before.

routine is usually bed by 7pm , nap around 12:30 for 1.5-2hrs but this past month she usually falls asleep at 8pm despite being in bed for an hour and then waking early. She will only have a short morning nap if we have to go out somewhere in the car but this is only once a week.

I don't know how to resolve this. We can't do controlled crying because she just gets out of the cot. We are getting a toddler bed for her tomorrow and will get a gate for her room but I just can't see how this will resolve itself if she won't stay in one place.

anyone got any tips? Anyone been through this before. I am willing to try ANYTHING

honestly the past month has been absolute torture. I went to bed at 9pm

Hello, Nanny and mother here! Sounds to me like she has grown out of that long nap in the day. My second ds grew out of his at 18 months. Sometimes he would have 30 mins, sometimes not, but it definitely helped with nighttime sleeping.
Also you have to be firm, don't let them in with you, just put them back to bed, use the stern voice and just say, "no it's bed time, stay there"
I wouldn't put her in a bed, you're really asking for trouble. Mine were still in grow bags then, so couldn't move around that well, and had cuddly toys in with them. Once they realised they weren't gearing out they self settled and often played for half an hour and then went back to sleep.

Ditch the nap.
Prepare for a week or so of horror, but then she'll be better.
The fact you put her to bed at 7 but she doesn't go to sleep till 8 means the hour in the day is no longer needed if you still want 7 to be bedtime.

Blackout curtains?

Where do you live that it is light at 245 am?!

You could try tweaking the nap, OP but I have to admit it hasn’t made a huge amount of difference to my early riser (not as early as yours!) No nap, nap for two hours, he still wakes when he wakes.

Could it be the heat? It is so stuffy here, we have a fan in our toddlers room.

Ditch the nap
Also, and I know you are progressing this, the cot has to go ASAP. If you are not putting the bed up today, can you take a side off the cot? Climbing over is potentially dangerous - if they slip at the top, it can be quite a high (in comparison to head height), head first dive, which isn't great.
FWIW, DS1 was napless weeks after his second birthday, and cotless from 22 months (his brother climbed out at 18 months).

Other than that, return to bed. Mine didn't get a groclock, but it's definitely worth trying. Just make the first few days achievable with the light coming on! And aim for the earliest acceptable time as the end target - 6am for us 😴

Either drop the nap, or massive increase activity levels or possibly both....

Think about reducing the light with a blackout blind as this time of year is dreadful for bright sunshine early....

Gro Clock? She may be a bit young but it may help....

Lastly the only solution to "she won't stay in bed" is doing rapid return....Ds had a grobag and I had to tie the zip shut to stop him unzipping himself and climbing out of his cot. It's pretty normal at this age.

Thank you all for your response. I just realise I hadn't finished my original post but it was just to say I went to bed at 9pm and waking up at 3 is still rough and I can't go to bed earlier or have a nap during the day.

@Swifey40 i am very reluctant to get rid of the cot but she was also getting herself out of her sleeping bags. We had one which was trickier to get out of but she ended up getting a bit stuck so I don't think we can risk it. She's actually never slept in our bed and refuses to sleep in it now, I was just so desperate

we have a fan and blackout curtain too and we are going to get a gro clock. I will give tweaking the nap a go but I really don't know how she will get through the day without one having been up so early 😭

Yes when they drop the nap it is tricky, as you will have a few tearful days as she is up "too early" but also needs to sleep through, which she won't do with a nap...

You will go backwards for a bit when you get the bed, will be easier for her to get out but long run it is better. Drop the nap,, you may have to start bathtime earlier as she swill be proper ratty.
In night Keep taking her back , maybe sit by the door for 10 mins as long as she stays in bed, just to break the cycle ideally out of sight to her but she knows you are there. Can build that time down.
Maybe with new bed change the settling routine so you are not in room when she goes to sleep.
It'll be tough but if you have partner then alternate and you will be setting yourself up well for the future. It is a transition phase and will pass

I would try bringing the nap forwards first (perhaps 11am) and see what impact that has. Sleep breeds sleep, I'd be reluctant to drop or reduce it further without having tried moving the nap.

I would shorten the nap to 45 mins/an hour before ditching it completely. We had a horrible time for a while with our now 3yo DD from the age of 2 so I feel your pain!