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Original poster

I am a smug know-it-all who is getting their come-uppance....

20 replies

TheHollyAndTheTwiglett · 09/12/2004 10:37

OOo if only I hadn't had all my posts deleted you could do a search and see how many times I gave the wonderful advice of controlled crying and letting them cry it out Blush

.. it worked for DS (but he slept through from the night we planned it and only had to do it when he was around 2 and moved to a bed)

... oo I knew it all ..its so much better for you both, it works

.. can I do it with 7 month old DD .. can I buggery Blush Blush

I'm a hypocrite Blush Grin

OP posts:
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sleepdeprived · 09/12/2004 10:38

Oh don't say that! I'm \link{http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk?topicid=5&threadid=47941\trying to work up the courage to do it tonight!}

JoolsTide · 09/12/2004 10:39

you're not trying hard enough! Grin

judegarland2512 · 09/12/2004 10:47

Funnily enough i had no probs doing CC with DS, but with DD not a chance! I jsut couldn't do it. Part of it was worry that she was disturbing DS (at least that's my excuse!). Eventually things were so bad that we had to do it - i physically could not get out of bed to her on one occasion. We used the going in to her, moving if necessary, covering with covers and going back out, no words, no eye contact - took about a week. Some days better some days worse. Good luck!

sleepdeprived · 09/12/2004 10:50

Jude have you seen my thread? Did you set a max time limit? If not how long did they cry for at most? Did you wait till they were calm before leaving room again?

sleepdeprived · 09/12/2004 10:51

You can answer \link{http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk?topicid=5&threadid=47941\here} - don't want to hijack Twiglett's thread

Original poster
TheHollyAndTheTwiglett · 09/12/2004 10:54

the difference is

she only started weaning at 25 weeks and DS was 14 weeks so part of me feels she isn't eating enough

she's still solely breastfed .. DS was on formula by 3.5 months so its so much easier to feed her for 5 minutest at 3am

DH won't get up in the night without me waking fully, nudging and nagging him .. he claims he can't hear her

I do leave her to cry for 10 mins though

I'm a weak-willed namby-pamby who should know better Grin

OP posts:
aloha · 09/12/2004 10:56

Oh, I don't know. I think a five minute feed at 3am sounds rather wonderful. My horror ds was up for hours at night at that age!

elliott · 09/12/2004 11:05

I don't really understand what the problem is. Surely sleep training is someting you do when it becomes necessary in terms of your daytime coping (or if the baby has severe sleep disruption and isn't happy because of it) rather than being something you 'ought' to do. Do you think she has a sleep problem? If she is just waking for one brief feed and you think she still needs that feed, then she probably does - 7 months is still quite young and especially if she isn't eating much yet.

Original poster
TheHollyAndTheTwiglett · 09/12/2004 11:07

sleep training isn't so much for you as a parent though its for the baby isn't it .. it is best for them to be able to sleep through the night as they have far happier days .. and it is a skill that is best learned early .. the given advice is they should be able to sleep through from 6 months

at least that's what I always thought .. up till now

OP posts:
aloha · 09/12/2004 11:09

Nah, I don't think a five minute wakeup at 3am will do your lovely girl any harm at all. I can't remember the last time I slept all night without a visit to the loo or a bit of 3am thinking time. I firmly think cc is for poor anguished sleep deprived parents!

wordsmith · 09/12/2004 11:12

I too am a smug know-it-all twiglett! It all worked so well will ds1, ds2 is a different kettle of fish. the same tricks do not seem to work. We go to ds2 within a couple of minutes because as soon as he has his dummy back in his mouth he goes back to sleep (yes, yes, i know.....) It could be that we are scared of waking child no 1. However on the few occasions ds2 has had the screaming abdabs for half an hour or more, ds1 has slept through it with no probs! (maybe it's a man thing! dh can do that too.) However we are moving ds2 and 1 into the same room this weekend so we'll soon see just how deaf he really is. Wish us luck....

elliott · 09/12/2004 11:15

No I'm afraid in our house sleep training is definitely about keeping the parents happy! (though of course I do think that babies and children should get enough sleep at night, and need to learn to go to sleep by themselves at some point)

ChristmasBOOZA · 09/12/2004 11:15

This is of course me Twigs. GrinAlmost identical situation. DS on formula in daytime at 3.5 months, solids at 17 weeks, CC with great success.

And DD, I keep going on about it on May babies, starting threads etc but don't actually do anything except a quick breastfeed when she wakes up. Actually I have got her so that she will happily go to bed awake at 7.30 pm and goes back to bed awake after her nighttime feed but haven't taken the next step.

And I know she will not wake DS up so don't even use that excuse to myself like jude has.

Original poster
TheHollyAndTheTwiglett · 09/12/2004 12:50
Grin

I think I'm just gonna feed her and hang the 'shouldn't be doing this lark' .. its just so much easier .. and she has previously slept through

I also think cos she goes to bed at 6pm (as in is asleep by 6) making it till 3am is pretty good going cos its 9 hours, she just needs a top-up to get her the last 4 hours ..

am I allowed to believe that? ? ?

OP posts:
codswallop · 09/12/2004 12:54

no cant do it with ds3
theres evidenc etyhat is it a " BAD THING" now isnt it?

prufRockingAroundtheXmasTree · 09/12/2004 12:58

Yes. I am bf at night when necessary as well. I still say ds sleeps through, although I probably have to get up and feed him one night in 3. I figure a 5 minute bf and then all back to sleep is far less bother than leaving him to cry.

motherinfestivemood · 09/12/2004 12:59

Whatever's easiest on you, that's my view. When you really can't face the 3am feed, and she's a bit bigger, give it a whirl again.

aloha · 09/12/2004 13:17

Twiglett - you see this face Envy ? Cos that's me, that is. Gawd, if I get one like yours you will hear my whoops of joy as far away as,ooh, E Dulwich...

lulupop · 09/12/2004 18:54

twiglett, if you don't mind the 3 am feed, what's the problem?

I kinow what you mean about it being just easier to give a quick BF as well... my dd is 7 months too and while I was BF I would just offer it to get her back to sleep quickly.

I started stopping (IYSWIM) BF at around the same time she stopped just going quickly back to sleep, and when I became a question of warming 1, sometimes 2 bottles a night, I sleep trained her. She started solids at 26 weeks and I had been thinking she must need those night feeds as she sucked them down fast and wasn't eating that much solids. but when I offered first watery formula, and then nothing, she started sleeping through very quickly and is not that desperate for morning milk either (so obviously not starving!)

I must say I do leave her to cry for quite a long time - up to half an hour - but that is just mid-level grumbling, not full-on screaming. She nearly always goes back to sleep after a bit and quite often sleeps right through. DS was a total nightmare so I'm very pleased DD has responded to some early intervention!

If guess what I'm saying is: while you don't mind, it's not a problem, but when you start feeling really knackered, that's the time to get serious about sleep training (if you believe in it in the first place)

kbaby · 09/12/2004 21:37

I wish DD would go back to sleep after a feed. Instead after a feed shes still awake for upto 2 hrs. ARRGHHHH..
I think the only reason you would do CC is if the night wakings are bothering you. Not because you think your LO should be sleeping.

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