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How to get 4 YO to stay in her own room...

6 replies

loveiscake · 23/04/2023 21:57

I feel I have exhausted everything I know & even the things I don't know so if anyone has any ideas PLEASE share them.

DD (4) has always slept fine in her room. 12 months ago, we had a house ren done, which saw her have to sleep in our room for 9 months, but in her own cot bed. Since ren has finished, we tried to put her back in her room. She wasn't happy about this, so we redecorated her room, got her to pick things she liked, etc, still no use. She suffers with bad dreams pretty much every night, we have bought a dream catcher. Not much use. Even if she's in with us, these happen regardless. She has a night light in her room, which is next door to ours. She goes to sleep fine in her room, but the last 3 months, every night without fail, she comes in to our room. Tonight it was at 9:40, other nights it can be 3:30. TBF she usually just comes in, gets in to her bed & goes to sleep no issue, but it's the fact it's happening every night, probably now out of habit. I just want her to be happy in her own room. She is an anxious/sensitive kid in some ways & I'll never tell her to go back to her room, etc, that approach won't help her. I remember being similar as a kid & my Mum having 0 sympathy, would send me back to my own room after a bad dream or if I was scared in general & it didn't do me any favours. Should I just accept this is how it'll be maybe for a couple years? We have another DC due in a few months & I wonder how the dynamic will work then, or maybe even if that's the cause for her being unsettled, despite her saying daily how much she can't wait to have a sibling. Any advice welcome!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
DustyLee123 · 23/04/2023 21:58

Why does she have a bed in your room still ?

loveiscake · 23/04/2023 22:04

@DustyLee123 It's there from the building work when we had to move her in with us, but also I don't want to share my bed with her, she's just too big at 4.. so if she has to come in to our room, at least we get some sleep.

OP posts:
KnickerlessParsons · 23/04/2023 22:06

Stair gate across her door and a hard heart for a few nights until she realises you're not going to let her out.

FuoriComeUnBalcone · 23/04/2023 23:48

I second a stair gate. Our 3.5-year-old has had one since being in his own room (we have dangerous stairs).

Ohow · 23/04/2023 23:49

Get rid of the cot in your room and take her back every time. She'll soon stop bothering!

DustyLee123 · 24/04/2023 07:09

She has a bed in your room so obviously she will come in to get in it.
You need to get rid and tough it out for a few nights, keep taking her back.

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