3am wake ups.... aaaah!!!

[Yellowflower123]

Hello everyone

I am a FTM and in need of advice please.

My DD is 11 weeks old. She has been a dream sleep wise so far. Since she was 6 weeks, she dropped night feeds and would sleep from 11pm till 7am. I KNOW, I was so lucky right?!

Well, last night was another story. She woke up at 3am and was HAPPY AS LARRY. We tried to settle her for 2.5 hours but she would not sleep. Eventually we gave in and gave her a bottle. She fell asleep straight away so I assume she was hungry. I was hesitant about giving her the bottle at 3am as I don't want it to become a habit and her to wake up for it every night.

But someone please tell me what's going on... is this a sleep regression? Or a random night of hunger? And will this last? Aaaaahhh!!!!!

She is 11 weeks old. 11 weeks old. 11 weeks. It is absolute madness that you'd not give her a bottle straight away when she wakes at that time. She's not even 3 months old. Your expectations for her at this age are really worrying

As kindly as possible, you wasted 2.5 hours of your own time and energy by not feeding a hungry baby.

Nothing's going on, you have a tiny baby whose sleep is going to come and go in waves. Get better, get worse, get better again. Realistic expectations.

The short answer is baby sleep changes all the time in the first year, even 2. Just constantly changes all the time, just when we think we know what’s going on it changes again. It changes with their development, with growth spurts, illness, teething, learning new skills etc etc. Best I can advise you is to try and go with the flow. But please don’t withhold milk at night for any reason, if they don’t wake then fine but if they do they still need to eat overnight at this age and a lot longer. There’s no such thing as bad habits with baby sleep, whatever you hear. It’s just nature and instincts for a long while longer.

Sorry you didn't want to feed a hungry baby incase it became a habit? She's a baby, and she's hungry. Not feeding them is neglect.

What on earth. Maybe if your baby was 6 months plus this would make sense but 11 weeks? Who knows what kind of developmental growth spurt was going on that day that made them extra hungry but there will be a lot more nights like that to come.

My baby is similar age to yours, sleeps really well. But still wakes for a feed once a night, sometimes twice! It's expected that babies wake up in the night, just accept it. Going 8 hours without a feed or nappy change sounds very unusual to be honest.

I was hesitant about giving her the bottle at 3am as I don't want it to become a habit

This is a bit mad. You said she took the bottle straight away so she was hungry. You can't not give an 11 week old a bottle when hungry in case it becomes a habit! She'll have all sorts of growth spurts and sleep regressions and any number of things that will disrupt her sleep.

My DD1 slept 8 hours straight for the first 12 weeks of life. Then it went to hell, but she needed the feeds she had.

I must say I think it silly to not first try giving a bottle poor baby is only 11 weeks old

OP, my DC did this and my first instinct was to feed her, despite her sleeping straight through for weeks prior. We had a couple nights where she suddenly woke 2-3 times. The next night when she woke up we lay there really quietly and didn’t pick her up and she went back to sleep on her own in about 5 minutes. If she’d woken up crying we would’ve fed/picked up but she was just looking around. To this day (4.5yo) she wakes up in the middle of the night sometimes for 30 minutes. She told us it’s because it’s when it’s quiet and she can tell her kitty stories 🤷‍♀️. If your dc isn’t crying, I’d leave them to it for a bit and see what happens.

At 11 weeks old if she wakes in the night the most probable cause is hunger, even if she had been previously sleeping through. Growth spurts are very common in the early weeks and months. Not wanting to feed her in the night to avoid “creating habits” is quite an absurd thing to say regarding an 11 week old 😳

Ha! She only wakes once in the night... you are actually onto a good thing.

But that aside not feeding a hungry baby is a bit odd. Are you feeding on demand in the day?

I do think sleep deprivation is actual torture I wasn't entirely prepared for with having a baby.

I've just realised its your FIRST broken night. My goodness. I was one of the unlucky ones where my baby didn't really get the memo about sleeping more than 2.5 hours at once. But this does make me realise when I read threads about what mums are up to and the energy they have that they might actually have a "sleeper" and be upset about being woken up once!

OP have you read any of the other threads on this board? Maybe just take a look at them and see what some parents are dealing with, sleep wise. Your tiny baby waking up hungry at 3am, once(!!!), doesn’t really need a whole thread dedicated to it. When your baby wakes in the night, it’s probably because she’s hungry. I would assume this until she is well established on solids. Best of luck!

Is it some sort of stealth brag?! Surely you've spoken to other parents/ read other threads/ know what babies are like..??

Ah, it is a wee bit early OP for sleeping through without a feed - just got to go with the flow in these early weeks as there is so much change going on. No need for a pile-on though - we’re all doing the best we can. Good luck with it!

In the kindest way possible, please please please feed your hungry baby. She is still so tiny and needs you to meet all her needs.