14 month old can self soothe at bedtime but not night

[SleepyMamaWantsHelp]

not sure if LO wakes up due to hunger or habit. He takes 20 mins to fall asleep at bedtime (7pm) and does so himself. But in the middle of the night he wakes up wanting milk. I’m trying night weaning but he’s unhappy about the reduced amounts so I caved in to a larger feed. This appeared to backfire as he woke up even more times
wondering if I should try a dream feed at 10pm?

Have you been giving milk in the middle of the night? If so, start to water it down with water, until you are just giving water. You will probably find that they will start to eat more during the day and then be less hungry at night. You can also try a bowl of porridge and banana right before bed, it digests very slowly and keeps them full for longer

He’s still little, I would feed him for a few more months yet. Also, it’s perfectly normal for babies and toddlers and even young children to wake up in the night disorientated in the dark and to want their parent. I think it’s completely unrealistic to expect and force them to go back to sleep without so much as a cuddle. They are small children.

I give normal dinner (meat, veg) but wondering if I should replace it with oatmeal as you suggest. I did think of putting baby porridge powder in his last feed before bedtime which he had before bath (to disassociate the bottle from sleep)

True. I am torn really, constantly guilt ridden whenever I try to night train. But I’ve just gone back to work after maternity leave and the sleep deprivation, compounded by looking after 2 children, is taking its toll on me. I do wonder if 14 months is too young, I only sleep trained my elder one at 3.5 years