3 month old bedtime

[Fiddledeedeeee]

My 14 week old dd has been a good sleeper from day one (to me anyway compared to my nightmare ds!).
She goes to bed when we do around 10pm ish (often has a last broken cat nap around 8pm ish but wakes when we take her upstairs so we change her nappy, I feed her and she takes herself off to sleep in the next to me).
she then wakes once in the night for a quick feed and again at around 6:30 and goes back to sleep after a feed then, usually until around 8:30am.
however the past few days I’ve had to wake her up in the morning so we can get on with the day, today I’ve let her sleep as we’re not doing anything and she is still asleep now (almost 10am) after her 6am feed!
I feel like she needs to start having a ‘proper’ bedtime of 7 or something, so she can get 12 hrs in a way that suits everyday life, but she doesn’t sleep well in her cot in the living room and it isn’t practical for her to sleep on one of us from 7pm (have a 3 yr old as well).
The advice is that they sleep in the same room as you’re in until 6 months as they need you to sleep safely (I’ve read this is because they need the chemicals we breathe out so they don’t go into too deep a sleep?) so I don’t really know how to do this safely.
how have other people managed this? Are they ok upstairs on their own if you keep going up and being in the room periodically, until we go to bed properly at 10ish? Or do we just carry on as we have been for a few more months, waking her up in the mornings?
it’s all new to me as my ds had very fractious sleep until recently. Any advice gratefully received!

Sorry to jump on your post but I'm a first time Mum and interested in this as well. My little boy is only 6 weeks old but around 7pm he will usually either sleep in his downstairs Moses basket or on us until around 10pm when we take him upstairs with us. Once we go upstairs we dim the lights and he has his last feed - he will then happily settle in his next to me crib and sleep for about 3-4 hours before waking for another feed. However, I've also seen a lot of posts from people who put their young babies to bed much earlier in the evening, so I was also curious about this is achieved if they are sleeping in the same room, as I don't fancy going to bed at 6-7pm myself. I was also wondering how people transition from 6 months onwards when babies can then start sleeping in their own room, as I can't imagine taking my little boy upstairs to sleep in my room at 10pm one night but then all of sudden switch to putting him in his own room much earlier in the evening, so if anybody has any tips it would be much appreciated :)

I would continue with what you're doing for now. Around 4 months their sleep cycles change (what people call the regression) so you could start a "routine" from then. By that, I mean a book,bath,pj's (whatever you want to do) but still take them back down with you until you go to bed.
It'll just get them into a good pre-bed routine and can really help.

However, my DD was never interested in any of that and even now we are really flexible and just go by when she's tired for a nap or bed, she's 19 months.

My DS will be 15 weeks tomorrow and we don't do any routine with him yet either

From 3 months we put our son to bed in our bedroom at 7pm, with the monitor on. He was doing the same as yours, not waking in the morning as he was starting to want his 12 hours at night.

I personally don't see the problem with putting them to bed for a few hours without you - especially with a monitor. I absolutely loved that time that my husband and I just got back after an intense 3 months of everything being about baby.

(I've never heard that reason re. The chemical we breathe out?! Sounds like baloney to me 🤣 but I am very cynical. I think it's just to do with keeping an eye on them in terms of rolling over or pulling their blankets over their face)

Go for it OP!

@pebbles3004 it's mainly so they can hear you breathing/background noises as it stops them from going into too much of a deep sleep. You won't be able to see on a monitor if a baby stops breathing! If it worked for you then that's great but it isn't the guidance that's out there at the moment and that guidance is there to reduce SIDS.

@Fiddledeedeeee just also be aware that not every child sleeps 12 hours overnight. My DD only ever does 10 hours overnight, always has done. 12 hours is spouted as being what babies should do but actually it depends on each individual child. Some will seep 12 hours but it is pretty common for babies to sleep anywhere between 9-12 hours overnight.