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Original poster

What should I be doing when my baby wakes up at night?

12 replies

Stefka · 12/02/2008 19:37

I put DS down at around sevenish - he feeds to sleep so it depends on how long that takes. He will then wake up again at some point - usually after an hour or so. I can then either get him up again and sit with him down stairs so I can be with DH or I stay upstairs with him trying to feed him back to sleep which can take hours. I have tried to just talk to him and not pick him up but he cries. If he wakes up in the middle of the middle of the night I feed him back to sleep but during the evening he has often just fed and he wakes up so isn't hungry and he won't self settle.

Sorry if this is a bit garbled - sleep deprivation! I just don't know what I should be doing. I am fed up of spending each evening either trying to get him to sleep or trapped on the sofa with him sleeping on me.

OP posts:
Original poster
Stefka · 12/02/2008 19:39

He's 16 weeks btw.

OP posts:
DiscoDizzy · 12/02/2008 19:40

You don't say how old he is, I would recommend this book It solve my children's sleep problems and i've lent it to quite a few friends who had success with it.

DiscoDizzy · 12/02/2008 19:41

Forgot to say that with DD1 we started reading this when she was 5 months and she slept through in less than 4 days, with DD2 we already had the knowledge and she slept through from 13 weeks.

nickytwotimes · 12/02/2008 19:43

He is still quite young, from your profile? Obviously he is still needing fed at night and only once is good! Don't bring him back downstairs after bedtime. Stay with him by all means, but no playing or chatting, just cuddles and quiet in his room! If he is fed to sleep, he will have to learn how to put himself to sleep - easier said than done! This is a very divisive issue on here! My lo was subjected to controlled crying at a young age and it worked for us, but it is not for everyone and I wouldn't recommend it if you can't bear a crying child - fair enouhg! You could try patting him and gradually withdrawing from the room? Be prepared-whatever you do will be tough but it is worth it!

Original poster
Stefka · 12/02/2008 19:47

I wish it was only once! He's up a lot during the night at the moment. I had thought that I shouldn't bring him back down but then I spend all evening in the dark in his room trying to get him to sleep which is really boring and depressing.

OP posts:
nickytwotimes · 12/02/2008 19:52

Stefka, it is boring and depressing, but in the long term...
OMG, I've turned into my Mother!

krc · 13/02/2008 10:13

If you don't want to go the controlled crying route, Elizabeth Pantley has a book - "the no cry sleep solution" which recommends taking them off the breast as they get very sleepy, and gradually bringing this forward. I started by waiting till he was asleep but not deeply, so he woke a little when I put him down. Amazingly, I was able to settle him without picking him up - talking/singing to him and patting him or puting a hand on his chest. Although he still wakes alot through the night (I haven't been following this on 3am wake ups..) The past couple of days I'm able to put him down properly awake for both his 7am and morning nap with just a couple of minutes fussing. I'm hoping that he'll start using this for his other sleeps now as well, and may not wake so often. The fact that I'm writing this is promising - he's been asleep over an hour and is a persistent waker after 30-40 minutes during the day...May be worth a try. I guess each baby/mum responds to different ways. Good luck

krc · 13/02/2008 10:29

Ooops, sorry - meant 7pm and morning nap.

witchandchips · 13/02/2008 10:50

It looks like his body clock is telling him that it is time to play rather than sleep in the early evening. What about putting bedtime back til 8.30 and doing some nappy off time to tire him out a bit between bath and breastfeed. Their cycles are so short that you can easily calm him down again with books and music afterwards. Once he is staying down for 4 hours or so after you put him to bed, then you can think about bringing the bedtime routine forward a bit

gingerninja · 14/02/2008 13:11

At this age I kept DD with us in the evening and would take her to bed when we went. That way you can feed and have company. If he sleeps this way it's not a problem, plenty of time to establish a proper bedtime.

Bodkin · 14/02/2008 21:16

I used to find my DDs woke about 45 mins after going to bed when they were very young like your DS - they come into a light sleep cycle then and if they have fed to sleep they wake a bit startled that the boob is no longer there! Do you rush to your DS as soon as he squeaks when he wakes at this time? I used to either wait a bit and see if they settled back on their own, or offer the other side and see if that settled them....

The other problem wiht feeding ot sleep is that he might have a bubble of wind that makes him a bit uncomfortable and wakes him. So it's worth trying ot rouse him a bit and get a burp out before putting him down.

Sorry, mines a bit garbled too... must get and early night

seeker · 14/02/2008 21:35

He's 16 weeks old - he's tiny. Fed him back to sleep or take him into bed with you There are no "shoulds". Do what gives everyone the most sleep.

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