Hi all,
My first post so hope I'm doing this correctly. I'm desperately seeking someone who has gone through what we are currently going through - I feel so alone and like I can't do anything right. I'm not looking for tips as such, more just hoping to hear other people have experienced something similar to share the pain and also hope there may be light at the end of the tunnel.
My daughter has always been a tricky sleeper. We have always had to rock her to sleep although nursery managed to get her to fall asleep independently, as has my mum.
5 months ago we had a real breakthrough. My mum did a solid week of naps and bedtimes and when we took over again as if my magic she would go to sleep in her cot initially just with us sitting next to her, which then developed to stroking her back in the cot. She would often sleep through the night.
At Christmas she had a horrendous ear infection meaning waking every 15 minutes so there was no option but to co sleep. Once recovered initially with a bit or resistance we were able to get back to her falling asleep by herself but within a couple of days there was the most almighty protest. It was so scary - hitting herself in the face, diving head first into the cot bars, so we had to pick her up. This has now escalated so badly that, no exaggeration, every nap time or bed time we put in the cot, the protest is extreme so we pick up and there is no soothing her. We've tried stopping and restarting but that doesn't help. We've tried delaying picking up and also picking up instantly. We've adjusted nap times and consulted a sleep coach to check in any other tips but nothing works. The only way is to have her in the sling which is even protested against, sometimes lasting an hour. But on top of that every night is between 2 and 3 hour extremely violent wake ups. Last night was 4 hours. Again she is too unsafe to be put down though have tried by surrounding her with pillows. Nothing soothes her until eventually she falls asleep exhausted, either in the sling or in the car.
I have only resorted to picking her up out of safety, the emotions in her are so extreme and terrifying. Then on top of that yesterday I found out I'm pregnant. Good news at just the worst possible time.
We've tried everything in the book so as mentioned I'm not looking for tips. I would just love to hear from anyone who has been in this horrible situation - a toddler so tired and angry they can't calm down . The pain I feel seeing her so distressed and tired and not being able to sooth her is the worst I've ever felt. Anyone else I speak to who had difficult sleep seems nothing compared to this, which has only made me feel worse. I feel utterly desperate. If anyone has come through this I would just love to know.