3 week old will not stay asleep....once i get him to sleep that is

[NewMamaMia]

ds has started to sleep recently about 10hours per day, and works himself up so much that he is hardly sleeping at night. It takes not only ages for him to get to sleep(I try everything from rocking,sling,swaddling,singing,a dummy when its obvious hes just sucking for comfort,putting him in his pram and walking around), and if he is moved anywhere(even if its from my breast to the side of me in bed because i have now given up on him going in his moses basket)he wakes up. I start to move him when i think he is in a deep sleep, i do it slowly, i re-assure him if he stirs but he is having none of it.
He is my first and im finding this really hard, I just do not know what else to do any other ideas?

Congratulations .

An important thing to realise is that it can take 20-30 minutes to settle a newborn to sleep. It's normal. Try settling him in the place you want him to sleep. I used to lay ds1 down and just stroke him, slowly, steadily, for as long as it took. When he seemed asleep I would make the stroking lighter and slower until I wasn't touching him at all. Dd seemed to like me humming or buzzing while I settled her. Try also always doing the same things before settling him to sleep, maybe a little song, rocking, swaddling him or wrappng him in a blanket or muslin, so that eventually he has cues to remind him that he will soon fall asleep.

Things do often change at about 3w. There is supposed to be a growth spurt at this stage - can't say I ever noticed it with my 3, but they all sort of 'woke up' around then. They became more alert and interested in what was around them. Also harder to settle!

I can't offer really offer any current advice since it's so long since my dd was a baby but you have my utmost sympathy.

Try to do the bedtime routine very very slowly so he doesn't get frazzled, feels rushed or overexcited. Allow twice as long as you think it might take to bath, dress and feed him. You could even try reading him a story in a soothing, monotone voice. Investing in a cd of light classical music can help settle fractious babies - you can leave it on constant repeat. You might also want to try burning a lavender candle somewhere the aroma can waft around
the house around bedtime. Don't leave it unattended in his room though. And try swaddling him - my dd loved being swaddled. In fact she's happiest when wrapped in several layers of clothes even now!! Make sure his room isn't too hot or cold. Babies also like being massaged, very gently. Good luck

This is a hard time, I know...buyt at 3 weeks, babies are normal behaving like this, preferring to settle and sleep next to mum, and to stay on or near the breast as much as possible. Going with the flow and accomodating this need as much as you can is actually easier than struggling against it.

I take it he's not sleeping 10 hours continuously, is he? That would be a bit concerning....

You could try posting on breast and bottle feeding folder, too.

My DS was like this. Some babies are just like this, and it's so very hard when the first thing anyone says to you is "are they sleeping through yet?"

If this is your first, I really would try resting when he's resting in the day. If he wants to suckle - let him. (This will help build up your supply if you are b/feeding anyway).

Try and remember that he has spent 9 months curled up snug and warm inside you, and this is all new to him. All he wants is that warm, familiar smell and comfort that he is used to. It really is okay to cuddle your baby lots.

You could try feeding him laying down. You lay on your side and he can feed and then you can just roll on to your back afterwards (or even just stay on your side), and you both get rest then and less disturbance.

And let the housework go to pot. It really isnt important - honestly

Things will settle down eventually.

Oh, and ignore any boasts from other new mums about how well their baby is sleeping - they are usually lying/exaggerating, or, they will be in for a short sharp shock very soon

thanks to all!!Was completely at my wits end, last night was abit better, but i will try some more of ur suggestions!!Trial and error eh!!