Hiya,
Could do with some advice re sleep training for my 11 month old. Some background: we've never sleep trained as generally he's a reasonably good sleeper, he does a mix of 7pm-5:30am or 7pm-6;30 with a wakeup around 3/4. He's currently on 2 naps a day.
The issue is he mostly doesn't self settle and it seems to be getting worse. He went through a phase at 6 months where he was self settling multiple times a week and I thought he would naturally learn it but he hasn't. This means that bedtime and night-time wake-ups can take multiple attempts to get him in the cot without disrupting him. During a night-time wake-up it can often take 3-5 attempts and last night we had to bring him into bed with us. Or I find myself getting stuck with him napping on me during the day because I can't put him down.
I really want to crack this, because I'm returning to work soon and he's going to nursery and I'm starting a new job at the same time so I can't afford to be up for hours at a time in the night with him! I really don't do well without sleep. Him not self settling is also becoming an issue when we need someone to babysit as it's really hard for them to get him to sleep.
I also genuinely think he's capable of it - there will be several occasions a week when I think I've bungled an arms to cot transition when he'll open his eyes, look at me, give a little grizzle and then turn over and go to sleep.
We're on a prolonged holiday at the moment with lots of moving about so he's been out of routine but we've now got 10 clear days at his grandparents to have a go at this (otherwise it's going to be difficult for at least 6 weeks before we can try due to jet lag, starting nursery etc) and I'd like to try while we have some support around us and aren't having to work at the same time.
I do not want to do CIO or co-sleeping. Neither of those work for me. I'm tentatively open to CC or gentler methods. He doesn't get truly upset when put down, it's more just grizzling crying. I've tried shush pat (admittedly inconsistently) in the past and I think he just become frustrated seeing me there in the room not picking him up, which is what makes me think CC might be the one for him. I don't think I believe the scare stories about it but I still can't but feel a little guilty for thinking about it.
Would really like to hear from anyone who has successfully taught an older baby to self settle. Looking for non-judgmental feedback from people who are open-minded to different sleep training methods, please.