Hates cot

[beansontoastx]

Me and my partner have co slept with our DD ever since she was a baby as that was what worked best for us at the time.
Now my DD is older ( nearly 15 months ) it is affecting all of our sleep so we have decided to move her into her own room.
Tonight being the first night of her being in her cot you can probably imagine it was not fun, she was uncontrollably crying / screaming to the point she was choking, hitting her head off the side of the cot and just not staying laid down.
I stayed in the room with her and kept assuring her that I was here but I couldn't bare listening to her in such a state which has now resulted into her fast asleep on my chest, and now I'm too scared to move.
I don't want to make her 'cry it out' as we live in a maisonette with people under us and I just don't personally agree with it, I also don't feel comfortable leaving her alone in her room incase she seriously hurts herself (obviously that will change once she's a bit more used to being in the cot)

I suppose I'm just looking for some tips and advice and wondering if anyone has gone through anything similar,
TIA, a very upset and tired mum

What I did with mine when bedsharing wasn’t working anymore as he started crawling and fell off the bed once, but also transferring to his cot was impossible as he would wake up instantly and get upset, is I took the legs off the cot and removed one side so it was like a floor bed. I then put our spare mattress on the floor next to it so I could kind of cosleep but he would be in his cot and then when he’s asleep I can roll away and go sleep in my own bed. And if he needs me at night I can again lay next to him, and on bad nights even stay there with him if needed. He’s much better with this setup than he was with the cot as it was!

I could have written this myself 2 nights ago. Mine is a year old, and until now had fallen asleep on me every evening and then come to bed with me. I was so fed up of it, novelty of being pinned to sofa had long worn off. Over the past few months we desperately tried a variety of techniques. Some staying in room, pretty much everything. He would scream for hours and if he did sleep it would last 20 minutes tops.

During the day he would always nap in pram and go to sleep very quickly and we continued doing this whenever we were trying sleep training.

I reached end of limit this week and last night we started with the following technique that had worked for a friend who had hired a sleep consultant.

7.00am- wake (wake her up)
7.15/7.30am- breakfast
9.15am- nap (30 mins)
10am- small snack if required
11.30/12pm- lunch
1.15pm- nap (1.5-2 hours) (12pm- nap if no morning nap)
3pm- snack if required
5/5.30pm- supper
6.30pm- Bedtime routine begins- milk, bath, bed

When you put them in cot, it's similar to ferber apart from intervals every 10 minutes and absolutely no picking up. They have to be sleepy but not awake when you put them in. It also says no staying in the room as that can frustrate and confuse them more.

First night yesterday he screamed for 3 hours, occasionally having 10 minute naps then he eventually slept. Like really bad, just like every other time.

It was hellish but we were determined.

Then today we were going to do our usual pram napping because it works but I was feeling confident and decided to follow plan and do cot and he did required naps in plan in cot. I was stunned. His never napped for 2 hours.

Then tonight, he fussed for less than a minute then went straight to sleep. I still can't quite believe it.

We are also sleeping downstairs this weekend for minimal noise. We got a camera to keep an eye on him. Occasionally he is waking for a few moments but then he is just getting himself back off to sleep.

We have never stayed consistent before, and especially always pram napped in the day.

I feel so excited. Only reason I'm up now is I've got so much more energy, even from sleeping on sofa.

Hope this helps you too. Stay strong and consistent and drown out any crying with TV to help you. The camera really helped me as well.

I find crying out tough as well, but this included 10 minute check ins. Also sleep is so important, its so important to teach them how to fall asleep and for the family to be getting good sleep. There is no research to show its harmful but we all know how damaging lack of sleep can be. Just wanted to say this as there is no need to feel bad.

If you live in a maisonette, just explain to your neighbours what you're trying and give them a box of chocolates.

His been so much happier, I've noticed a difference in just 1 day. And I'm much happier, have more energy even just from one night.