Hi everyone, I’m new here.
I just signed up because I’m at my emotional and wits end with my little girls crying at bedtime. She’s now 16 months, but it’s been going on her whole life.
The background is:
I used to breastfeed or my husband would rock or ssssh her to sleep. Each nap time or bedtime would take over an hour of this, so we were 3 hours behind by the time she went to bed.
So at 11 months we paid for sleep training. I stopped breastfeeding then, and we followed the chair method, (a gradual cry it out method), tightened up our routines and the crying got a little better - 10 or 20 mins max. She dropped to one nap then too.
But now we’re back up to absolute distressed crying every night, and it hurts my heart and I don’t know what to do or how to make it better. I’m in tears each night myself too, and I just wonder when will she not hate bedtime anymore. When will this get less painful!? No one I know has had this with their kids. It’s not a sudden attachment issue, or a regression; she’s never gone to bed without crying. I don’t even know how to get her to sleep anymore, since I stopped the breastfeeding 5 months ago. It’s always crying.
We do dinner at 5pm, bottle at 6.15, bath, books, singing and bed. We then leave the room and the distress for her immediately starts. It seems like a tight routine.
She sleeps through most nights.
I’m not expecting answers, more just wondering if anyone has had this experience too, as I feel like we’re alone in it :*-( Advice welcome of course, but more just knowing this might be normal or even a little common…?