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Controlled crying- seemed to have made things worse

26 replies

Darklava09 · 02/01/2023 00:24

Our DS2 is 16 months and sleep over the past few months has been difficult. Still like to be rocked to sleep etc and bedtimes was taking hours to settle despite being tired- mainly overtired!

over Xmas decided to do controlled crying. Went like

day 1- 20 mins
day 2- 10 mins
day 3- 2 mins
day 4- 90mins
day 5- fell asleep on me watching tv
day 6- asleep on me again whilst winding down

the 2 days he fell asleep on me he slept through. The first time ever in his life so I thought actually without all the crying and hysterics maybe he will be ok to be able to be put to sleep on us first and then transitioned over.

now when we try and put him down when asleep he wakes as soon as he is put in his cot. No matter how asleep he looks or is as soon as his head touches the cot he wakes but yet is fine if he is lay down in our bed. Night 3 and he is refusing to go down in his own bed.

every nap now he will not sleep in his cot and is doing the same- waking as soon as he is put down. When napping today we tried to just leave him when he was grizzling- turned into full hysterics and would not settle despite being tired. DP blames controlled crying saying it’s ruined his routine and made it worse.

I feel like he’s got a negative association with his cot now and do not understand why/how he knows the difference between being placed in his cot and our bed.

not sure where to go now and what to try. Any advice. DS1 was an amazing sleeper so not had this before. DS2 also suffered a lot with reflux and allergies so needed a lot of comfort through the nights.

advice for a tired and worn down mommy! :(

OP posts:
Keha · 03/01/2023 23:33

OP, with DD who is now 2, we've had periods of her sleeping in our bed, then worked on going back to cot/toddler bed. Then something happens a few weeks/months later and she is back in our bed, then work back to her bed etc. Basically I'm saying don't panic, maybe just try and get the best sleep you all can for a few nights and the work gradually back towards a cot/floor bed/whatever feels like it'll work.

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