How to get baby to wake at a reasonable time

[Kmolloy]

Hi everyone- looking for some advice about sleep 🙏

My almost 6 month old has had reflux/ colic/ constipation since birth and it’s been horrendous. The last week or so she seems to be better- still very sick but doesn’t seem to bother her as much. Her naps are still all over the place but the main issue is that she keeps getting up waay too early. She started getting up and 5:30, then 5. So I accepted it and started going to bed earlier thinking ah well it can’t last surely. The literal DAY I decided this, she started waking up between 4- 4:30 instead. a couple of days ago I decided after a bit of research to just go with it and try moving bedtime forward by 10-15 minutes every few days (she’s been passing out around 5:30pm obviously). Yesterday I moved bedtime to 5:45.. -and this morning she woke up at 3:45 and wouldn’t go back 🤯 I can’t go to bed any earlier because I have a toddler who insists I put him to bed every night and a partner who works until 15 minutes becfore toddlers bedtime. Although if I’m honest he’s pretty useless and has decided that getting up with the children at night/ in the morning is too much for him 🙄 toddler also doesn’t sleep well so wakes overnight. Baby is surprisingly good overnight. I weaned early and she doesn’t have a bottle. More often than not sleeps through these days. A little retribution from the months she would only sleep on me and still woke up screaming every 30 minutes for an hours rocking.

Exhausted, emotional and just fed up of my life right now.

Anyone been through anything similar? Any advice on how to get out of this before she starts waking up before I’ve gone to bed??

My baby did this and still does wake around 3ish. I give her a bottle and she settles down again to sleep. Is there anyway of reintroducing a bottle of some type? I'm sure you followed Dr's advice te the weaning early due to the reflux but I'm fairly sure baby still needs some form of bottle, formula or breast milk or something at this age. I'm happy to be corrected though.

At 6 months my daughter would do exactly the same.She is 12 months now and is still an early riser although now its 5.After trying everything I just adjusted my day to it.

Morning

Not much advice I am afraid but support for you, it is really tough running on little to no sleep . My lo did however have reflux we found small meals and small bottles helped so not to give them too much at once. I know you have researched moving bed time. But have you considered later bedtime when my lo was this age he was 6.15pm then has gradually got slightly later as he got older now up to bed at 7pm. He is 12months. I found this helped with naps as well he would then nap 9am after 5.30am wake up, nap for sometimes 30mins to an hour then afternoon about 1.30 for an hour. My lo naps were never great. Also I know you said you have weaned but can you give a night bottle at say 2am to help them go through till morning,

But just thoughts really, my lo goes to bed and asleep for 7-7.15am however still wakes between 5.30-6.30 including nightly wakes. He rarely has milk through the night now. But I now work till 11pm so it is hard. But you also have a toddler, you are doing so well. My bedtime unless I am at work is 9pm. It is a struggle tho because you want time to yourself.
Just supporting you because this is hard xxxxx

This.

Treat the early wakes as you would a night waking. Baby may need a feed. Surely you don’t mean baby doesn’t have any bottles at all? I weaned one early due to reflux and just because they were also eating solid’s didn’t mean that they’re supposed to stop having bottles before they’re even 6 months…

She definitely needs a bottle, do you mean she no longer has any milk? Babies’ main source of nutrition until one should be breastmilk or formula.

After that you could try adjusting her bedtime and naps. Babies of this age need an average of 14.5 hours of sleep ideally 11-12 overnight and 2.5-3.5 in naps. Some babies need less! It would be abnormal for her to go down at 5.30 and stay asleep beyond 6am at this age.

Mine is a similar age and will wake at 3.30am if I don’t manage her carefully which means a bedtime no earlier than 7 and finishing her last nap around 4/4.30. She also does better when she has 3 naps instead of 4.

My 6mo is struggling with early wakes at the moment too. I spoke to a sleep consultant who advised to work with 6pm-6am as nighttime. We aim for bedtime as close to 6pm as possible (but if he's tired we put him down earlier) and any wakes before 6am are treated as night wakes. That means if he wakes, I give him 10mins to settle himself back to sleep, and if that doesn't work I go in and replace the dummy, shush for a bit, and hope he falls back to sleep. After 6am, if he wakes but isn't upset I just let him vibe in his cot until he starts to get worked up, then unfortunately we are up for the day.

Mine is also fully night weaned, has a bottle before bed and one when he wakes. At 6m, if there are no concerns about weight then it is developmentally appropriate for them to go overnight without feeding - this does not mean they have to (I have friends with same aged babies still feeding 1-2x at night) but it does mean they are able to so if you've night weaned and baby isn't hungry then no need to go back to feeding to address these wakes unless you want to.

It's rubbish, but mine is getting there slowly. We had 2 wakes closer to 6.30 this week, but this morning DH was up with him at 6 on the dot because he'd been grumbling since about 5.40. Consistency is key so if you want baby to sleep longer, you need to resettle them each and every time in the same way until they get it. Good luck!

You probably don't want to hear this but some are just early risers, my first woke up at 5 every day for three years. We tried everything other than sleep training as neither of us agreed with it. We just adjusted our lives to 5am starts and then one day she started sleeping until 6.30am! We did nothing to create that change, she just did it herself.

Number 2 will sleep into until 8am if not woken up by number 1. I have done nothing differently with number 2, they are just a much better sleeper all round. No idea why, it's just different children.

Hi. Yes I did. I was originally giving her a milk when she woke but she would drink around half and still not go back to sleep! She was also refusing her “breakfast bottle”- even when I left it 4 hours after the night feed. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Is she warm enough, I would try increasing the heat in her room/ more layers. The early mornings are the coldest so your DC maybe waking as they are cold

She is a very big baby and has a lot of formula during the day just to clarify. And I also don’t expect her to sleep until 6 after going to bed at 5:30, but I can’t keep her awake past this time. Today she just passed out at 5:20 on me the second I picked her up. I could try feeding her before she wakes I suppose but she usually sleeps for 10-11 hours overnight which I think is normal?? I did speak to GP and HV about no bottles at night and the assured me it’s fine- she’s on 3 meals a day and I have not dropped any milk other than night one

thanks everyone. Sounds like I’ll just have to accept my fate and hope as her naps get longer she might be able to creep up to a reasonable hour

oh also (sorry for the multiple threads I’m new here 😂) 9 times out of 10 she doesn’t wake up crying. She quite happily gurgles away and gradually gets louder until I’m worried she’ll wake brother up so get up to see her. She always gives me a big gummy grin and starts chatting away. When I first stopped the night milk there were a couple of times I did feed her because she was upset and wouldn’t settle- so I’m not adverse if it will help. The problem is, it doesn’t!!

She is warm enough yes- we have an oil heater in there. Before we got that she was waking every 30 mins- 2 hours and I would end up bringing her in bed with me. It’s only since we go it that she started with her full nights sleep

Can't you adjust her daytime naps so she's not so exhausted at 5:30 pm? Ie last nap of day (shortest nap) would end at 4:30pm? Then bed at 7pm and you should get later wake up.

Also no matter what don't get her up for the day before 6 am otherwise you're reinforcing that it's day time.just shush pat, feed in dark etc and eventually she should get used to it