Length of sleep/between feeds at night

[whyyy321]

Hi! I'm just looking for some reassurance that this is normal and will pass really.

My DC is 3 months and still only going 2.5hrs between feeds, occasionally 3 hours (usually in the day if this happens). One glorious night they went 4!

They wake up like clockwork. I've tried dream feeds, changing how dressed at bedtime (in case cold), wake windows in the day and pausing to make sure definitely awake and needing before I go to them. They are in a next to me a few feet away from me.

For context, they were very slightly prem (36w something) and breastfeeding hadn't worked out (so combi fed expressed and formula). No known health issues.

I think basically I'm asking for reassurance that things will change as I looked back thr other days and the feeding schedule is still as it was as a newborn! I don't want to not feed when they are hungry, obviously (and good amounts are being taken at each night wake so I assume it's not just habit snacking). I'm exhausted (DH does help- does a dream feed midnight ish then up at 6ish). Will we ever get longer sleep?? They are so noisy at 5-6am that one of us ends up getting up and starting the day. Other NCT mums and people online seem to get good 4-5 hour stretches by this point and I'm starting to feel a bit down about how things aren't changing.

Is this normal?? Will it change??

So hard! Sleep deprivation is the worst. I remember nearly crying at an nct meetup because it seemed all the other babies were sleeping so much better! My daughter didn't sleep longer than 2 hours at night until she was well over 4 months old and it was awful. She is much better now. It is just a phase albeit a very difficult one!

Morning!
Completely normal, I say as a mum of a 7 month old. Mine didn't go more than 2 hours overnight until about 3 weeks ago (except for one glorious 6 hour stretch one night around 4 months old!) It was frustrating because all I seemed to hear about were the babies at mum group who were sleeping through the night at a month old etc etc. Then it just changed.. about 3 weeks ago she started leaving it longer and longer, now she does 5 hours- unthinkable before and every night it gets a little longer 🍾

Hang in there, I'm sure it will get better, 3 months is still so young but I'm sure they'll figure it out/ gain some more weight and naturally extend.

Ohh thank you both, it is so reassuring to hear that it will change! The 2am spiral of "I'll never sleep again" is intense. Social media doesn't help, with people having 12 week olds sleeping through the night!

Seriously ignore all the social media rubbish. It's totally normal to still be waking up regularly at this age. Frankly my first child woke up every 2 hours overnight wanting to feed until she was well over a year old, my second does 2.5 to 3 hours overnight at almost 5 months. I have done absolutely nothing differently with number 2 and as far as I can tell they're both totally normal.

Feeding can be also about comfort and reassurance rather than hunger but I always went with if there's even a little whimper overnight I'd offer a boob because when it comes down to it no parent wants their child to be hungry or needing a bit of comfort.

I found it helpful to adapt ourselves to the baby rather than expecting a tiny human to adapt to us when we've had 30 plus years of living outside the womb. Honestly it will improve, just keep going.

3 month old here also wakes every couple of hours! We had a couple of nights last week he went 4/5 hours and I thought wow he's cracked it, then he went back to every two. Just wanted to post to say you're not alone!

Ah thank you! Feels good to have some reassurance from others also in the sleep deprivation trenches!

Certainly don't want to deny them comfort or food, absolutely!

My premature baby (20 weeks, 15 corrected) went straight from three hours to five hours overnight a few weeks ago. We were actually a but freaked out and constantly checking him the first couple of nights. He's also combi fed and the most he'll take at one time is 150ml. Last night he went six hours which seems too long at this age.

The switch from three to five was sudden though. You will probably worry when it happens.

I actually don't think sleeping through at this age and weight is a good thing, although sleep is wonderful the desperation is all too familiar. At the start we got none as he needed burping holding up and then I went to express after every feed, then it was time for the next one. If you're doing this can you express every other feed for sanity's sake? As he's older than prem now you'll probably get the same milk and more sleep.

Thanks! Yes I remind myself that it's a survival mechanism that they wake up, you are totally right!

I'm actually cutting back on expressing with the aim of stopping as I'm finding it takes too much time from my day and isn't particularly good for my mental health. Aiming to stop when he's 4 months, but I've always had a low supply and it's dropping almost daily now.

Yeah, I'm scared by how much mine sleeps now. Expressing is hard and he's had a lot from you already. I'm literally expressing once a day now and giving him that, plus a bit of breastfeeding. The whole try to breastfeed, bottle feed then express really damaged my mental health too. I'd like to keep on giving him a bit for a while but we'll see how it works out. Not focusing on how much you get helps xx

So we had 3 great nights where he slept in two 4 hour blocks! Having great feeds, nicely spread out. And then tonight I'm up for the third time since 1am and it feels like he's just snacking :(

Wondering if it's the cold? Last three nights have had heating on, but not tonight ..?