Is this early sleep regression hell ? HELP

[Maisie2019]

DS is 3 months old and has reliably been waking once at around 3am for probably about 2 months now (lucky I know). Has a dream feed at 10pm. Sleep pattern is usually 7-10,10-3,3-6.30.(with feed time in between). All of a sudden about a week ago he is waking up all over the shop. It started with a random wake up at 1.30am really upset had to rock him back to sleep and thought it was a one off. Then at 5am again that morning. He has 2 teeth so I put it down to that. Note he does not actually need rocking to sleep at nighttime he has reflux so he is fed, propped up and falls back asleep off his own accord. Now this strange pattern of waking his been going on for a week it starts around 1/1.30am, he will wake and fuss until I give in and feed him at 3am, Im not sure if he is actually hungry as he has a full 6oz at 10pm and when I do feed him he will have a few oz and fall back asleep. Then again it happens at 5am fussing and waking until I get him up at 6.30am. So essentially he is waking 1ish, 2ish, 3ish, 5ish, then up at 6.30. I am drained. Nothing seems to have changed in the daytime, he has recently learnt to nap independently whereas previously would only nap on me he now has pram naps. Actually protests if I try and hold him now (never thought I’d see the day). His nap lengths aren’t amazing but I also am happy with the nap situation at present because I no longer have to hold him for every nap. His wake windows are about 1.5-2 hours which get longer throughout the day, he is back down for a nap by 8am. 3 naps a day about 1-1.5 hours each (would be 45 mins by his choice but I catch him when he wakes and rock the pram). The only thing it could possibly be is that we were told we were over feeding him by our paediatrician!! He was taking 5oz every 3.5 hours and then 6oz before bed, we were told we should reduce this to 5oz every 4 hours so that’s what I’ve been trying to do. My only thought is either

• He has hit a sleep regression early
• he is hungry because I am stretching out his feeds but he is also tired so he is waking for hunger but then falling asleep after a few oz

Any tips ?? Is it possible to have a sleep regression this early? Or do we think it is hunger or something else to play here?

anyone? I’m on my knees here 😢

With a baby that young, feeding them would always be my first solution but I haven't bottle fed so I'm not sure how practical, etc that is. If you feed at the 1am wake then what happens?

Sleep and night feeds aren't linear so just because he went X hours without a feed before doesn't necessarily mean he can go X hours without one now.

I bf mine and just fed them if they woke and they didn’t need a nappy change or seem unwell.

it’s early for a sleep regression but could be teething. After the 4 month sleep,regression I blamed just about everything on teething - it made me feel,better to have a reason even if I wasn’t right!

@Muchtoomuchtodo after last night I am pretty much convinced it’s the regression, he was waking every 2 hours on th dot from when he fell back asleep. All started after midnight his first period of sleep from 7pm was fine. I might try feeding him at the first wake up tonight and see what happens. I’m quite sure he isn’t hungry and I’m wary of the reverse cycling effect of him eating more at night and not in the day. Yesterday I demand fed him and he had an extra bottle to usual but still the same wakes. If it is the regression - how long did it last for you? Any tips to help get through it?

@Hugasauras i think it would cause more of an issue only because he takes full 5/6oz feeds and when he is waking he has only just had a full 6oz 3 hours ago. I’m slowly becoming convinced it’s the regression because looking at this chart of the sleep cycles he is literally waking at these exact points! If it is indeed a regression (I have no explored all other options, too hot, too cold, bigger feed before bed, dummy, no dummy, different white noise, blackout blind) any tips for survival? Do I just try and “ride it out” as such, will he improve on his own? Or is there something I need to do to help him through? I keep seeing advice saying put them down drowsy but awake to help them learn to resettle on their own but I just can’t do that as he has silent reflux he has to be propped up (on his own mind you) and then transferred. He does fall asleep by himself though no rocking or cuddles just not in his next to me.

@Hugasauras would have been helpful for me to include the chart. My brain is fried lol.

The word ‘regression’ is a pretty crap and unhelpful one. Baby isn’t going backwards, they never go backwards, their sleep is just more disturbed due to a period of rapid growth and/or development. They’re learning new skills, they’re having a growth spurt, they’re waking more frequently as a result. They may also need more food at night due to a growth spurt, I would always feed first before trying anything else especially with a tiny 3 mont old. There is no reason to avoid giving milk. The best advice I can give is to try and understand why their sleep is up and down and try and just ride the wave with them as much as possible. I’ve added some things that might help below, but just try and get what rest you can, most housework can wait.

sarahockwell-smith.com/2017/07/24/the-rollercoaster-of-real-baby-sleep/

Drowsy but awake is also ridiculous sleep training bollocks that works for almost no babies, they need support and comfort to sleep. There’s no evidence that going to sleep not being held makes babies sleep more. I’d just ignore that one. When your child is ready to go to sleep without support they’ll let you know, but it could reasonably be years.

@BuffaloCauliflower thanks for your reply. Yes I agree regression is unhelpful be sure I can see how much DS is changing and learning and it’s good that he is developing but it’s hard when it does feel like it’s going “backwards”. My two reasons why I didn’t want to feed him were because

1. the paediatrician said we are over feeding - he said no more than 30oz in a day? Because he has GERD
2. i had read about reverse cycling where you keep offering milk at night and then they stop taking calories in the day and it turns into a vicious cycle

of course if he is hungry I would always feed him but I genuinely don’t think he is as when he does have the night feed he has a few oz and falls back asleep. I literally can’t do drowsy but awake anyway because if he feeds he has to be propped up afterwards and during this time he falls asleep. We have had to start using a dummy to get him to resettle - am I making a rod for my own back?

Never went through it with my DD (20m), currently 5 weeks in with my DS whos 4.5mo and to be fair, I’m more drained mentally than physically - hourly wake ups pretty much all night long, on a lucky night every 2-3 hrs. I’m just accepting it and telling myself it’s a phase. Biscuits, nice coffee and wine - that’s how I’m currently surviving. Every baby is different and yours may be over in a week or so, not all babies go through it and doesn’t necessarily has to be so rough with your baby so good luck OP!

@Vienna92 5 weeks! You poor soul. What are you doing when he wakes? Offering feeds / resettling / dummy? I’m just confused as to whether he will just grow out of it and we do nothing or do we need to “help” him along?! Sending hugs and solidarity!

So I always try to resettle with a dummy first but he keeps spitting it up so I pick him up for a cuddle - sometimes it takes a while to settle him. He is a big boy - we do co sleep but it’s not helping at all, he stirs even more so I’m considering gentle sleep training at 6m if doesn’t settle by then. I dont offer him a feed every single hour he wakes up, but if He wakes up and I know it has been 3hrs since la at feeding e.g I do offer a bottle - that settles him - until he wakes in the next hour or so! So it has been tough. Thanks and hopefully it does sort itself out soon very than later!

I always just fed them if they woke up - we never had a strict routine, just a rhythm. The rhythm evolved every time they got a bit bigger - I noticed there would be bigger/more frequent feeds and then there would be a growth spurt. Babies change all the time, so makes sense their feeding would too.