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Has anyone tried the Ferber method younger than 6mo?

16 replies

Mamabear04 · 15/09/2022 14:21

Has anyone ever tried the Ferber method younger than 6 months old? Just wondering if it's possible. It worked wonders for DC1 but we tried it at 6 months and I'm just wondering if 4 months is far too young to try it for DC2. If you did manage to train at 4 months did you avoid the 4 month sleep regression?

I'd just like to hear from people who have sleep trained using the Ferber method as I know a lot of people get upset about sleep training on MN.

OP posts:
Blondbombsite · 15/09/2022 14:24

I did but only at 5 1/2 months. He was well passed the sleep regression but getting increasingly clingy, to the extent that he would only sleep latched on. It worked wonders in a couple days (even the first night really) but I wouldn’t have done it at 4 months.

Skiingwithgin · 15/09/2022 14:27

I did it for naps about 5 months and overnight at 9. With great success. No point doing it at 4 months due to the sleep regression in my opinion but I’m no sleep expert!

Mamabear04 · 15/09/2022 14:36

@Blondbombsite @Skiingwithgin thanks for the reply! Good to know 5 months is an option. My OH thinks we should try at 4 months but I'm not sure how it would work with the sleep regression and if it would all be in vein. Did either of you try any fuss it out methods prior to using the Ferber method? DC2 is a very good sleeper but still needs to be held/walked/shoogled to sleep in his moses basket. I'd just like to nudge him in the right direction before proper sleep training.

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Skiingwithgin · 15/09/2022 17:46

Nope, they’re still in the 4th trimester at 4 months so I cuddled/rocked/boobed to sleep etc. i did it for months after the Ferber method too. No haven’t, she slept through at night since 9months and breast fed to 17m!

nonsuch thing as bad habits, don’t worry about it they’re so small still

Wifflywafflywoo · 19/09/2022 03:20

My DD started her four month regression at about 13 weeks. After a week of hell we decided to start letting her cry it out for five minutes, pop in and reassure then leave again. Within a week she was going down in her cot no bother, linking sleep cycles about 75% of the time, using her thumb to self soothe (she's always been a thumb sucker) and going to bed at 7:30pm. We're now at 18 weeks still going strong with four naps and one night feed. Longest she ever cried for was 8 minutes. I'm just waiting for the bubble to burst and it all fall apart at the next regression!

Mamabear04 · 19/09/2022 12:28

@Wifflywafflywoo that's amazing! Well done for doing that. It's so hard to know what to do because they say you shouldn't train during sleep regressions, leaps etc but we trained DD when she was teething which most people say is a no no.

Can you tell me more about what you did. Was is 5 minutes every time? Did you pick DC up to comfort her? Did you stop her crying before leaving? From my experience training at 6mo as long as you stick to the training when the sleep turns again (for reasons mentioned above) then it continues to work. I think it's when parents wonder from the framework that it doesn't work.

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Wifflywafflywoo · 19/09/2022 13:00

@Mamabear04 we had a week of her just constantly screaming, refusing to sleep through the day, it was awful to see her so upset so we gave her the week to see if anything changed and when it didn't we decided to try and help her.

From birth she has slept in a cot bed in her room with me in a big bed on the opposite side. We tried a next to me crib and she hated it so just went straight to cot. She was on off with dummies at the point of her regression with the odd thumb suck. Since birth she's had the exact same bedtime routine too with the only difference the time we start it (first few months it was variable depending on her, from regression we set the time as part of her training).

We put up a blackout blind in the nursery, set the lullabies up on the cot camera and put a ssshhhing bunny next to her cot. Laid her sleepsack in the cot so it was ready to go and set the Huckleberry app (used it since birth) to 4 nap days with 7:30pm bedtime.

So starting from bedtime routine:

6:30pm bath
6:45pm into nursery with galaxy lights on for dry off/pjs/nappy/sleepsack. Very chilled, low voices, dim lights.
7pm low lights, read books, snuggle binky, have a bottle and burp.
7:30pm put lullabies on, put ssshhh on, lights out and lay her in cot bed.
10:30pm dreamfeed full bottle, gentle burp, back in cot.
3-4am ish small bottle if she asks, 2.75oz usually, gentle burp and back in bed.
6:30-7am wake up, snuggle and a bottle/burp.

Then its nappy change, clothes on and onto her mat in the living room for tummy time, roll over practice, toys.

We use huckleberry to tell us when her next nap will be, if she eye rubs/yawns/whinges/gets red eyebrows before this time we take her to nap. If she lasts ok we usually head upstairs 10/15 minutes before the app nap time.

For naps its dark room, lullabies, ssshhh, sleepsuit. Lie her in cot and leave immediately. She does whinge everytime she goes down (not crying) so we just watch her on camera and listen for crying. If she cries the 5 minutes start. After 5 minutes if she's still crying we go in quietly, pick her up and cuddle until she stops. Pop her back down and repeat. Longest cry was 8 minutes. She uses her thumb to soothe to sleep.

She tends to stir or wake up around 35-45 minutes. We leave her and watch on camera, she usually sucks her thumb back to sleep, if after a few minutes she's still awake we go in quietly, pick her up and try to cuddle back to sleep to put back in cot. Sometimes works.

I feel a bit dramatic saying it changed our lives but it feels that way! I can actually do things during her naps, we get couple time on an evening.

O and I also make sure to give her one nap a day walking in her pram so she doesn't lose the ability to nap outside her cot. Fluffy pram insert, pram hood all the way down, pram fully reclined and she goes out like a light. Also naps in carseat in full sunlight.

Honestly for us it was just the best thing we did with her!

Mamabear04 · 19/09/2022 16:17

@Wifflywafflywoo thanks so much for your advice! Have you used the Huckleberry app since birth? How did you get DD to sleep prior to sleep training? Sounds like we will try your method once DS gets to 4mo although will be hard to keep things calm with a toddler who needs to go to bed at that time too!

OP posts:
Wifflywafflywoo · 19/09/2022 17:07

@Mamabear04 yes we started using the app from day 2 when we got home from hospital. Prior to sleep training we just let her nap when she wanted which was every half hour - 45 minutes at first. During the day she was in her pram or on me being cuddled/rocked. I'd then pop her in a little cot we had in the living room and she'd finish her sleep there. At night she was bathed and then DP would lie her on him and rock her to sleep.

Thankfully we only have her to deal with! Not sure how well I'd do taking on two bedtime routines! Lots of luck x

naomisuissa · 19/09/2022 19:50

Wifflywafflywoo · 19/09/2022 13:00

@Mamabear04 we had a week of her just constantly screaming, refusing to sleep through the day, it was awful to see her so upset so we gave her the week to see if anything changed and when it didn't we decided to try and help her.

From birth she has slept in a cot bed in her room with me in a big bed on the opposite side. We tried a next to me crib and she hated it so just went straight to cot. She was on off with dummies at the point of her regression with the odd thumb suck. Since birth she's had the exact same bedtime routine too with the only difference the time we start it (first few months it was variable depending on her, from regression we set the time as part of her training).

We put up a blackout blind in the nursery, set the lullabies up on the cot camera and put a ssshhhing bunny next to her cot. Laid her sleepsack in the cot so it was ready to go and set the Huckleberry app (used it since birth) to 4 nap days with 7:30pm bedtime.

So starting from bedtime routine:

6:30pm bath
6:45pm into nursery with galaxy lights on for dry off/pjs/nappy/sleepsack. Very chilled, low voices, dim lights.
7pm low lights, read books, snuggle binky, have a bottle and burp.
7:30pm put lullabies on, put ssshhh on, lights out and lay her in cot bed.
10:30pm dreamfeed full bottle, gentle burp, back in cot.
3-4am ish small bottle if she asks, 2.75oz usually, gentle burp and back in bed.
6:30-7am wake up, snuggle and a bottle/burp.

Then its nappy change, clothes on and onto her mat in the living room for tummy time, roll over practice, toys.

We use huckleberry to tell us when her next nap will be, if she eye rubs/yawns/whinges/gets red eyebrows before this time we take her to nap. If she lasts ok we usually head upstairs 10/15 minutes before the app nap time.

For naps its dark room, lullabies, ssshhh, sleepsuit. Lie her in cot and leave immediately. She does whinge everytime she goes down (not crying) so we just watch her on camera and listen for crying. If she cries the 5 minutes start. After 5 minutes if she's still crying we go in quietly, pick her up and cuddle until she stops. Pop her back down and repeat. Longest cry was 8 minutes. She uses her thumb to soothe to sleep.

She tends to stir or wake up around 35-45 minutes. We leave her and watch on camera, she usually sucks her thumb back to sleep, if after a few minutes she's still awake we go in quietly, pick her up and try to cuddle back to sleep to put back in cot. Sometimes works.

I feel a bit dramatic saying it changed our lives but it feels that way! I can actually do things during her naps, we get couple time on an evening.

O and I also make sure to give her one nap a day walking in her pram so she doesn't lose the ability to nap outside her cot. Fluffy pram insert, pram hood all the way down, pram fully reclined and she goes out like a light. Also naps in carseat in full sunlight.

Honestly for us it was just the best thing we did with her!

We did quite similar to this after about 3 days of being woken repeatedly during the beginning of the 4 month regression (he was exactly 4 months). I couldn't cope with it (I have other kids and was really struggling to get back to sleep after each wake up) and he was exhausted and grumpy. I took away the dummy (as he had started to wake every time it fell out) gave him a comforter and did similar method of letting him cry/ whine for 5 minutes before intervening. It worked almost immediately and he now almost always sleeps through other than waking once for a feed (similarly between 3-4 am). When he does wake up at other times (very rare) he will self settle within the 5 minutes. He also naps very well and I have to wake him from naps normally. He does protest when I put him down for a nap, but normally for a minute max. I have other kids so it's not completely calm at bed time, but is relatively quiet and we have a good routine.

Mamabear04 · 19/09/2022 20:24

@naomisuissa that's really positive to hear! Was DC in a nap routine before the training? Just wondering if I should be nudging DS in the right direction but he's still very young only 10 weeks!

OP posts:
BonesOfWhatYouBelieve · 19/09/2022 20:33

they’re still in the 4th trimester at 4 months

I thought the 4th trimester was 12 weeks long??

Wifflywafflywoo · 19/09/2022 23:16

@Mamabear04 I think it's good to introduce good habits / routine that is based on sequence of events and not necessarily fixed times from as early as possible. Then, when you do come to sleep train, your building blocks are already there and just ready to fix into place.

DD now asks to go to her bed when she's tired. She has a certain whine that she does. You pop her down and she happily lies there sucking her hands until she falls asleep. Whining stops as soon as she hits the mattress. It can take anywhere from a few seconds to an hour for her to then fall asleep. It's her safe, sleepy place and she knows we're around if she really needs us.

naomisuissa · 20/09/2022 14:07

Mamabear04 · 19/09/2022 20:24

@naomisuissa that's really positive to hear! Was DC in a nap routine before the training? Just wondering if I should be nudging DS in the right direction but he's still very young only 10 weeks!

Hi, yes he was having regular naps from birth, ie I had a rough idea of his wake windows and would put him in crib for regular naps.

poppet131 · 18/04/2023 13:26

@Mamabear04 Did you end up doing any sleep training and did it help? X

Mamabear04 · 25/04/2023 16:09

@poppet131 yes! At 4mo we did very short interval training of 2min, 3min etc up to 7min. DS was asleep within 7 mins and has been falling asleep independently ever since. It's not been a golden bullet like it was for DD in that he still isn't sleeping through. Sometimes he'll sleep 7pm-6.50am which is great but last night he was up for an hour at 4am just rolling about his cot. Quite annoying but it's been a God send being able to put him down to sleep and not have to leave my 3yo for very long. Not quite sure how to sort cutting out the 4-5.30am feed. Any suggestions? If we do intervals he just won't go back to sleep during that time. He's not crying but he whines with tiredness until I feed him...

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