Dreamfeed? <<groans>> it was more like a nightmare! BF dreamfeeders, where did I go wrong?

[Bodkin]

So, DD2 (6 months) is not a bad sleeper. 60% of the time she sleeps from 7ish to 3 or 4am, so that is kind of bearable. Sometimes though (and more lately), she likes to wake at 1, 4 and 6 or something, and it's all starting to make me feel very crap. So I thought I'd try a Dreamfeed to see if I can get her to go through to at least 4, if not all the way.

Anyway, tried a dreamfeed at 10.45 last night, but without going in to too much detail, things were worse than ever! Where did I go wrong? Too early or too late with the DF, or do I just need to give it time to work?

Bodkin,

A bump really as sadly I was rubbish at DFing too. My DS would always wake up unless he was sleeping in my bed with me...in which case it all went smoothly.

Thanks for the bump! Any other Dreamfeeding gurus out there?

not me but when you crack it tell me cos 8.5 mths down the line she wakes up loads!!

Wow, you guys are brave, my baby would wake up if I thought about dreamfeeding him.

[lurk]

Every time I've tried a dream feed with ds it has made b*gger all difference to when he wakes. He normally goes down at 7.30 pm then wakes for a feed at 4am. Last night did a DF at midnight and he still woke at 4am . He's 9 months and BF. The only thing I think makes a difference is if I stuff him full of porridge at bedtime .

DF worked brilliantly for Dd but she was FF.

Not much help probably but it didn't work for us. Ended up staying up later to dreamfeed and it made NO difference to DS's waking, gave up after 3 nights!!! Hopefully someone else can offer something a bit more positive.

not much help probably but i never found that a dream feed worked with either of mine. if i lifted them for a feed they still seemed to wake up at whatever time they would have anyway, in fact sometimes it seemed to stimulate them to wake up later for an extra feed when otherwise they would have slept straight through from 7pm till say 3am they would acually have df at 10.30pm, then wake at 1.30am and 4am aswell. also with ds he was usually so deeply asleep that nothing would wake him enough to drink any milk, i could even change his nappy and he wouldn't wake up. i found it was best if i just fed them whenever they woke naturally but i do know lots of people who used dreamfeeds to great effect!

oh dear it seems as though most of us have had the same experience!

Soph - my experience exactly - she seemed to get into a pattern of waking every 2 or 3 hours after the DF last night, whereas normally she would do a stretch of at least 6 hours.

I was thinking about cutting out nightfeeds altogether, but we have a big family holiday coming up, and I thought it would be useful to be able to feed ehr back to sleep while we are away if she wakes in the night, so thought DF might be a good temporary solution. I did it with DD1 when she was 7 months and it worked really well, she has been a super sleeper ever since and it made her happier in the day as well.

Didn't work in the slightest for ds. Intored at about 6 mths, after 3 weeks of doing it, he still woke at 3am for a feed. At which time we tried to drop it, whereas he then thought that 2 nightly feeds was worth hanging onto
With dd, I could totally & utterly latch her on in her sleep from almost day one, but I don't think it made a huge difference to her sleep after about 3/4 months (when I didn't bother, she slept pretty much the same amount

Neither of mine were great sleepers, though, so I doubt this is The Answer.

Glad I'm not the only one. Have been df for about 2 months,(daughter is 5 months) at first it seemed like it was going to work she went 5 hoursafter df before waking. for the last month though,she's been waking after 4 and again 1.5 - 2 hours later, and has started to wake up for the df.I know their sleep can go a bit loopy at 4 months, but starting to wonder if it's worth doing.Hoping something may make her go longer soon as will be starting solids in a couple of weeks.

After those two stories I'm not doing it again in case she starts waking for the late evening booby!

Back to the drawing board then...

Definitely think it's not worth bothering (although it seems to work for FF for some reason?). My mum and some other oldies (!) also confirmed that the first feed to go is always the late evening one, and unfortunately they seem to hang on to a 2 or 3am one for ages. Certainly DS did - he would always sleep his longest stretch FIRST ie 7pm to 2am). Then wake 3 hourly.
Tried dreamfeeds, tried full on waking him up, lights on, nappy change nazi style 11pm feeds but the unfortunate side effect was once I gave it up, he started waking at 11ish which was about 45 mins after I'd gone to sleep.

If you're feeling brave you could try not offering a feed at some of the night wakings, so that DD doesn't always need to feed back to sleep (or is it too late for that?). Sometimes a quick cuddle, and a fast run out of their room is enough!

Although not sure I have any real advice to offer on sleep as am usually up once a night with DS2 (1) for a bf...

I tried the "I'm too bloody knackered to get out of bed and feed you and it's 11.30pm and you can normally manage til at least 1am" approach last night, and she settled back down after 2 minutes until 4am

Oh god, haventsleptforayear, I know exactly what you mean re being woken up 45 mins after you've gone to sleep, it's the absolute worst, I feel nauseous and totally disorientated and then I look at the clock and want to scream!

Dreamfeeding has never worked for us either. It just seemed to get her into a 3 hourly feeding habit in the night again, and encourage waking if anything.

Having scrapped that idea and got over a nasty illness which basically meant cosleeping and never removing nipple from mouth the whole night (all comfort feeding) we are currently in a one feed per night (8mo) somewhere between 2 and 4am, and back in the cot, and you know what, compared with what we've had over the last month, that's a luxury, and I'm not messing around with it again.

Good job Bodkin, well done!

Oh yeah, is she:

a)weaning yet?
b)teething?
c)growth spurting?

All of which caused major sleep f*ck ups at around this time for both my girls, and another reason I dont' think df works - if there is something bothering the baby a df won't make it go away.

Bodkin - are you living my life and just changing the gender of the baby?!? We tried DFing for the first time for a couple of nights this week and it was a nightmare, ds just woke every two hours throughout the night. Last night were so buggered that we didn't bother and the wee angel slept through from 7.30 till 3.30. Think I might steer clear and stick with what we know. Thanks for starting the thread, I thought I might be a Bad Mother for not achieving it.

Dreamfeeding worked with DS. But he slept nicely at night from early on.

Made absolutely no difference with DD. Only time has made a difference with her.....she does now generally sleep through (but won't say how old she is in case I depress anyone...)

EmMck... yes it's good to know I'm not alone in my ineptitude with DFs!

So it looks like the result of this highly scientific study is that Dreamfeeds Do Not Work on BF babies.

(BTW, on my post before, I meant that stopping nightfeeds at 7 months worked with my DD1, not dreamfeeds. i seem to remember having the same problem with her!)

worked on both of mine... Lucky I guess

oh this is making me feel sick as no.3 is due in 13 weeks and I just don't want to go back to regular night wakings!!! My two are fairly good sleepers but at 18mths and 2.8yrs we have fairly regular night wakings what with coughs and colds and teething and the odd waking for no reason at all so hopefully this will be the perfect baby and sleep through from 3 weeks old (wishful thinking!)

You could tried warm water during one of the night wakings- that sometimes settles them and weans them off a feed. Depends if you think they really need it or not- if the baby is not really hungry in the morning then they probably don't need all those feeds in the night. My dd would wake in the night for a tiny feed and then would wake up at 7.30/8am and refuse anything till 10 or 11am!! they can be so fickle!!

Worked on DS, but DH always gave him this feed. It was EBM, not formula, but maybe somehow the bottle makes a difference?? Dunno, DD won't take a bloody bottle, and wakes at 10.30ish for a feed regardless. Doesn't stop her wanting more at 1, or 2, and/or 3 or 4 or 5. Whenever she surfaces and fancies a little snack.

I tried the dreamfeed once and once only! It was the worst night ever! I'd rather run things on his clock...whenever that might be!

My twins are now 4 months old. they at least are on 4 hourly feeds most of the time. I started doing dream feeds about 1 month ago just to stop the senario of going to bed and being woken up 45 mins later. I don't think it has made one bit of difference to the twins but for me and my husband it has, now if feels like they are only waking once any time between 330-530. At least the girls go straight back to sleep so judging pros and cons DF has worked for us but not cut out feeds in the night but i don't think they are taking enough in the day yet. go with your instincts but if you decide to do it i would give it a good go before making a final decision.