My room or their own room, from birth?

[smellymelly]

I have ds, 5 and dd 2, when they were newborn they slept in a moses basket with me, until about 4 months when they were moved into their own rooms. Always settled well, and went to sleep on their own, but took ages before they slept through, ds was 11 months, and dd is still having problems.

We think we are doing the right things at night, followed information in books and from sleep clinic advisor, but I was wondering if maybe it was because they slept with me from a very young age.

I have spoken to a couple of people whose babies slept through from a matter of weeks, and it seems the majority of these slept in their own rooms from the start.

I'm paranoid about cot death, and I know the advise is to keep babies in your room till they are 6 months, but with my twins coming in 2.5 weeks I'm confused at what to do for the best.

I'm so tired, I am hoping it won't be too long before we get a good nights sleep.

What did you do, and how long before they slept through?

My dd was my first and she slept in my bed for the first couple of weeks and then moved into a moses basket by my my bed until about 4 months when I mved into her own room. She slpet through from 10 weeks. My ds was the loudest sleeper in the world - he burped, farted, scratched , snorted and snored. He lasted 2 days in my room before I moved him outside the door so I could get some sleep but still hear if he needed me. He was so noisy that by the end of the week I had moved downstairs to the lounge (couldn't use the nursey as dd still in it and didn't want to move her out of the room so soon whilst she was still adjusting to ds arrival). He slept through from 6.5 weeks. I don't think that sleeping with you makes any difference. Both of mine are good sleepers and always have been but i think thats as much luck as judgement. You can do things to help a child sleep through - and likewise you can do things that will encourage them to wake up - but I think that there are also genetic/biological factors in play as well. Do whatever you think is best with your twins. Ultimately whatever makes you happiest will be best for them.

Mine all stayed in the same room as us until they were about a year old. None of them had real sleep problems. 1st baby of 4 slept through at 9 weeks. Third baby was the oldest to sleep through at 8months.

I have a theory that some sleep problems are a result of baby monitors. I never used them at all. That meant i did not go through to babes whenever they made a sound but only when I could hear them through the wall. My friends who used monitors tended to have problem sleepers.

I think you should do whatever makes you happy. My firsr stayed in the same room as me until she was nearly a year old. The second went into her own room at about 8 months and the third when he was about 6 months. Grandson came to us at five months and once he was well enough, went into his own room about four months later. Do what makes you comfortable.

Hi Smellymelly!

I have 2 children, DS 2.6 and DD 13 weeks.
With both my children they slept in a moses basket until 3 months old and then went into a cot in their own room.
I also wondered whether I was doing the right thing at the time. They were both more settled and slept for longer. My DS is now in a big boys room and continues to sleep with no interruptions (touch wood!).
I have the intercom on so I can hear any sounds and I also have a camera linked up to the nursery so I can keep an eye on my DD and randomly check to make sure all is well....probably not necessary but I am curious to know what the little one gets upto in the night!

I had my daughter in my room for about a year and, from about 3 months, she was a great sleeper. This next one will be in here for who knows how long since only got 2 bedroom house - oops. But, like mears, didn't have, and won't have, a monitor. Could all be luck of course.

You'll all probably scream at this, but DS2, who is 2 in December, is still in our room in a cot. The main reason for this is that we sleep in quite an isolated room downstairs while his room would be upstairs, and we both are not keen on the idea of trooping up and downstairs in the middle of the night or even early morning (have no central heating). In addition, his room at the moment is the TV room so that we don;t have one in the living room, and is also used as the guest room. With lots of guests planned over Christmas, we probably won't move him out of our room for some months yet.

OMG - couldn't wait 2 years. What about a sexlife?

How did you all get babies who slept through then? Especially those who had them in your room. I would be happier having them in with us at least for a couple of months, but am desperate for sleep too.

I will be breast feeding, is it this that makes a difference? As I do find it is easier to just feed them as soon as they wake up, maybe that is my mistake?

I breastfed both mine and i dont think it makes any difference - except that you dont get to share the night feeds with anyone else . Handy thing about breastfeeding when they are in the same room is you can just pull them into bed with you, plug them on and doze without worrying about choking etc.

I had both of mine in our room til about 6 months. Ds was a nightmare - a noisy, snorty baby, and didn't sleep through the night til about 18 months. Dd slept through from about 6 weeks, and both breastfed til 8 months or so. Personally, I worried too much about cot death - stats show it's best to keep them in with you til about 6 months - but do whatever feels right for you.

ds and dd stayed in our room for 6 and 8 months respectively, and slept through from about 3 weeks (by slept through I'm talking 11-6.30). I loved having them in there! I've heard (though it may be an old wives tale) that having them in the room helps protect against cot death because your breathing and movement prevents them getting into a really deep sleep when they may forget to breathe. Don't know how true it is though...!

smelly - we put dd into her own room at about 3.5 months - it was the room beside ours. She STILL doesn't sleep through!!

I know you didn't want to hear that though....

Smelly, I agree that you should do whatever you're happy with and what works for you.

In my case my DS (my first and only baby) has been sleeping in his own room from day 1. He is a very good sleeper. Mostly breastfed until 3 months (he is 4 months now) and slept through from 2 months.

DD was in our room until she was about 5 months, was bottle fed and we had a monitor.

She went through (10-7) from about 5 weeks and has been getting 13 hours a night (7-8) since about 10 months.

When she was in with us I would put her down, hop into bed and watch telly. It didn't seem to make any difference to her. During the day she would fall asleep no matter what noise was going on in the house. I could hoover around her. She even slept all through a noisy disco and being passed around as everyone wanted a cuddle.

I don't know if it was anything I did, maybe I just got a sleepy one? Do whatever feels right for you.

My twins were in with us for a good while as we had a one bed flat at the time. Went from our bed to carry cots to big cots. They tended to be good sleepers- 5 hours or so by 4 weeks and 7-7 by three months. They had a major blip at about 6 months when they realised we were only a foot or so away from them and wanted to gurgle at us all night, becoming outraged at our sleepy grunts of non-aquiesence. I'd have moved them into their own room around then if I'd had the chance. I think. However, it felt really important to me to have them very close in those early days so I would definitely agree with those saying go with your instincts on this one.

One thing- if you're breastfeeding it's good to have them pretty near because one thing that helps sanity is to feed them simultaneously. Getting up and going to get the twins from another room and then carrying them to a room with a suitable feeding place- ie sofa or bed- could be a major operation, I imagine. I just used to have everything within reach so that I could sit up in bed when the first cry came, grab the v shaped cushion, grab crying twin, grab his brother and sit back and doze while they had their milk fix. Sounds horrendous as I type it but was actually quite pleasant.