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Should I publish my 6 month DS’s bedtime routine??

50 replies

Regressionisreal · 05/08/2022 22:46

So I’m thinking of getting my 6 month DS’s bedtime routine published as a recommendation for other parents, based on what he did this evening - what do you reckon?

6.30 - final feed in order to remove feeding as a sleep association.
7.00 - bath
7.10 - book
7.15 - actual final feed, because who are we kidding.
7.30 - attempt to unlatch
7.35 - attempt to unlatch
7.40 - attempt to unlatch
7.45 - realise baby’s head is boiling hot against your sweaty arm and you have probably cooked him to sleep. Place comatose baby in cot and sneak out.
8.03 - baby wakes, send husband to settle.
8.05 - inhale dinner while listening to baby shout at husband.
8.15 - rescue husband
8.15 - 8.30 - sway baby fruitlessly in 27 degree heat.
8.30 - place shouting baby in cot in case he magically self settles this time.
8.32 - turn baby onto side for bottom pats and head stroking. Endure baby’s withering gaze.
8.40 - start swaying again, this time with reiki music
8.45 - curse reiki music for giving you false hope when it worked for one nap yesterday
8.50 - remember that thing you read on Mumsnet and retrieve yoga ball from spare room. Knock over baby monitor in your hurry to leave the room.
8.50 - 9.05 - bounce on yoga ball with baby, feeling like a bit of a dick, but consoling yourself that at least it’s some exercise too. Endure baby’s laughter.
9.10 - try swaying again. Listen to baby chatting to wardrobe like drunk elf.
9.15 - decide the issue is probably that baby’s sleeping bag is too small now, lay him down in bed to switch him to the bigger one.
9.16 - take off sleeping bag, watch baby roll onto tummy, only to remember he can’t roll back yet and start shouting.
9.17 - point travel fan directly at baby despite SIDS guidance, cos what the hell.
9.18 - attempt baby massage - this will chill baby out for 10 minutes. Text husband to let him know the baby is really taking the piss now, but it’s working.
9.27 - baby starts shouting again. Put sleeping bag back on.
9.30 - Give up and feed to sleep again.
9.40 - place sleeping baby in cot.
9.41 - trip over yoga ball.
9.42 - sneakily roll yoga ball out of room, close door and go downstairs.
9.44 - remember the baby monitor is still on the floor, swear, go upstairs and put it back.
9.50 - wine.

Obviously if any parents need a bit more flexibility then they can remove certain elements, or shift the routine back or forward 5 minutes or so, perhaps by 1 minute each day.

Thoughts?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
JenniferBarkley · 06/08/2022 09:03

I was getting angry just opening the thread but you've nailed it Grin

If it's any consolation, my first was like this but my second was a breeze until I went back to work and she decided she didn't like sleep after all so you're not doomed to repeat it.

Regressionisreal · 06/08/2022 10:55

Haha I’m glad this gave a few people a laugh! Amazingly, despite that ridiculous start to the evening, he then did a nearly 7 hour stretch! 😱 Followed by a quick feed and then down again for 3 hours. He hasn’t done anything close to that in weeks! So obviously we’re speculating wildly about what did it - my money is on the bigger sleeping bag! So yes I was able to enjoy my wine, thank you!

Or maybe he didn’t take kindly to me taking the piss about him on the internet and didn’t want me posting throughout the night 🤣

@Rosesandblossoms Yes he’s my first and we were actually so lucky with his sleep initially. He very quickly did 5-6 hour stretches, and even 8-9 hours around 3 months, which was fine as he was a chunky little boy! Then 4 month regression hit, which was still ok - waking every 3-4 hours perhaps, but still settling quickly. But now he’s experiencing what I assume is 6 month regression and has been waking every 2-3 hours and taking an hour+ to settle each time! Why would he sleep when he could stay awake to roll, babble, grab at mummy’s face etc…

Sorry to hear your second has deprived you of some sleep - hope you’re nearly out the other side?!

@twoandcooplease - So I usually go upstairs and set everything up for the bath - changing mat and nappy etc on bathroom floor - then I get ready for bed while DH gives him a bath, so I’m only counting the bath time bit as when his toes hit the water I guess..! But it was also much quicker than usual last night anyway as we’ve been giving him cool baths because of the heat, but I think I made it too chilly so he was a little shouty so DH cut it short 😬

@Romainingcalm Haha, so true - I was doing more muttering the previous night I think, when I was not dealing with it well, but last night was actually laughably ridiculous!

@LouMoo13 Spot on! 😂 Some must see desperate sleep-deprived parents as a bottomless money pit!

@Sunshineona - Hehe I know that shriek! I feel so bad for my DH when DS is clearly shouting for mummy. But fortunately DH works from home and settles DS down for a nap every day around 9am, which usually works like clockwork, so at least he can tell himself it’s not personal - it’s just something about nighttime when only mummy will do 😬

@Peloaddict Omg your poor mum 😂 Hope you apologised when you got older, haha.

@shellstarbarley Haha, excellent - this is a phase to look forward to… I remember midnight toast snacks from when I was a teenager!

@MolliciousIntent Hehe, all done via text message rather than on landing, but yes - been there. “I don’t get it, he’s so tired and all he needs to do is close his eyes - why can’t he do it?!!”

OP posts:
Regressionisreal · 06/08/2022 10:59

Oops, tagging fail so reposting!

Haha I’m glad this gave a few people a laugh! Amazingly, despite that ridiculous start to the evening, he then did a nearly 7 hour stretch! 😱 Followed by a quick feed and then down again for 3 hours. He hasn’t done anything close to that in weeks! So obviously we’re speculating wildly about what did it - my money is on the bigger sleeping bag! So yes I was able to enjoy my wine, thanks!

Or maybe he decided he didn’t take kindly to me taking the piss about him on the internet 🤣

@Rosesandblossoms Yes he’s my first and we were actually so lucky with his sleep initially. He very quickly did 5-6 hour stretches, and even 8-9 hours sometimes, which was fine as he was a chunky little boy! Then 4 month regression hit, which was still ok - waking every 3-4 hours perhaps, but still settling quickly. But now he’s experiencing what I assume is 6 month regression and just doesn’t settle easily! Why would he when he could stay awake to roll, babble, grab at mummy’s face etc…

Sorry to hear your second has deprived you of some sleep - hope you’re nearly out the other side?!

@twoandcooplease - So I usually go upstairs and set everything up for the bath - changing mat and nappy etc on bathroom floor - then I get ready for bed while DH gives him a bath, so I’m only counting the bath time bit as when his toes hit the water I guess..! But it was also much quicker than usual last night anyway as we’ve been giving him cool baths because of the heat, but I think I made it too chilly so he was a little shouty so DH cut it short 😬

@Romainingcalm Haha, so true - I was doing more muttering the previous night I think, when I was not dealing with it well, but last night was actually laughably ridiculous!

@LouMoo13 Spot on! 😂 Some must see desperate sleep-deprived parents as a bottomless money pit!

@Sunshineona - Hehe I know that shriek! I feel so bad for my DH when DS is clearly shouting for mummy. But fortunately DH works from home and settles DS down for a nap every day around 9am, which usually works like clockwork, so at least he can tell himself it’s not personal - it’s just something about nighttime where only mummy will do 😬

@Peloaddict Omg your poor mum 😂 Hope you apologised when you got older, haha.

@shellstarbarley Haha, excellent - this is a phase to look forward to… I remember midnight toast snacks from when I was a teenager!

@MolliciousIntent Hehe, all done via text message rather than on landing, but yes - been there. “I don’t get it, he’s so tired and all he needs to do is close his eyes - why can’t he do it?!!”

OP posts:
GeeGee333 · 08/08/2022 15:55

Need to read this today, dreading bedtimes and wishing summer away as sick of sweating every bedtime and it being bright daylight until 9.30pm

thinkfast · 08/08/2022 16:01

Wow you have it easy OP. Both of mine were horrendous sleepers at that age. Much worse than this.

MolliciousIntent · 08/08/2022 19:42

thinkfast · 08/08/2022 16:01

Wow you have it easy OP. Both of mine were horrendous sleepers at that age. Much worse than this.

What an unhelpful, unsympathetic comment! It may not be as difficult as you had it, but no one could call a 3.5hr bedtime "easy".

It's not a race to the bottom.

Regressionisreal · 08/08/2022 20:09

Congratulations @thinkfast would you like a medal? 😂 Thanks @MolliciousIntent

@GeeGee333 I hear you - I've been wishing the summer away too as I always need to sway or feed to sleep. We can't get the bedroom below 27 degrees at 7pm atm. What I've found helped is getting a travel fan from Amazon and directing it at us both while feeding. During the horrid heatwave a few weeks back I also fed him with ice packs leaning against my legs on the bed and my feet stuffed into icy champagne coolers! Actually worked a treat. Desperate times...

OP posts:
WaverleyOwl · 08/08/2022 20:16

Sanch1 · 05/08/2022 23:16

I agree wine is the solution!

Please don't post this as a funny comment.

Some of us are struggling with using alcohol as a coping mechanism and comments like these normalise it.

Anotheroneofthose000 · 08/08/2022 20:17

Lol

lurchermummy · 08/08/2022 20:21

My two are 20 and 17 but this brought back so many memories. Now all the rocking patting et cetera has been replaced by me saying breezily " I'm off to bed don't stay up too late" (but nothing beats baby snuggles)

MolliciousIntent · 08/08/2022 20:25

WaverleyOwl · 08/08/2022 20:16

Please don't post this as a funny comment.

Some of us are struggling with using alcohol as a coping mechanism and comments like these normalise it.

Eh, I think you might be being a little oversensitive there. Having a glass of wine at the end of a hard day isn't normalising alcoholism.

bakewellbride · 08/08/2022 20:28

Reading this having just resettled my baby!

I won't publish my bedtime routine but it is interspersed with my 4 year old's bedtime avoidance tactics.

AuraBora · 08/08/2022 20:34

Thanks OP, this had me in stitches!
Currently on hols and have decided the solution to my 5 month old's bedtime (and nightime) antics is to put him to bed at 8 or even 9pm! Then he can get up later too 😁

thinkfast · 08/08/2022 20:39

Sorry OP. I didn't mean to come across so bitchy. Your OP was pretty funny. I think you just touched a nerve and brought back some excruciating memories.

Regressionisreal · 08/08/2022 20:49

No worries @thinkfast - tone gets lost on here sometime! Having a baby who won't settle / wakes up multiple times is so draining isn't it - if you don't laugh you'll cry. The other night I just opted for laughing..!

OP posts:
Regressionisreal · 08/08/2022 20:50

@AuraBora This is what we did during the last heatwave, but even later! He just had an al fresco buggy nap in the garden around 6/7pm while we had dinner then we put him down at 10pm when we went to bed and the sun had set. Now we've reluctantly decided he needs a proper bed time.

OP posts:
bakewellbride · 08/08/2022 21:04

9:04 sit on sofa to finally fucking relax then hear baby on the monitor!

AuraBora · 08/08/2022 21:19

Yeah, when we go home I know we need to face actually working on getting LO to self settle, and also get a more consistent routine in place.🤔

LemonDrizzles · 08/08/2022 21:27

"7:15 final feed because who are we kidding"

One of the greatest lines ever!

Hahahehehoho · 08/08/2022 21:32

When do you ring your mum, crying? Cos both my dd’s with tiny babies ring me to rant at least 4 times a week 🤣

i can remember this acutely even 30 years on! You’re doing great, all of you

Pompom2367 · 08/08/2022 21:48

This made me laugh dd struggles with naps she will refuse any that are not on me was out walking with fil today and he kindly pointed out that the sun was in her eyes and I accidentally blurted out I know I'm seeing if it will help her close her eyes so she can sleep I was definitely judged for my desperate attempt

Sandcastlesinthesky · 08/08/2022 21:54

I didn’t know fans were a SIDS risk?! You’ve taught me something

Mally100 · 08/08/2022 22:09

Brilliant and true! Thanks for the laugh.

Pancake1203 · 08/08/2022 22:15

Thanks for the laugh! This is hilarious and painfully accurate! Read it out to my husband and was struggling reading through the laughter at points 🤣

GinnyBee · 10/08/2022 08:25

@Sandcastlesinthesky pointed directly at baby they are because of the diving reflex, but circulating the air in the room lowers the risk. 🤷‍♀️

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