Looking for advice/strategies please, becoming a bit desperate...
4.5 YO DD is starting school in September and her sleep has took a real nosedive since new sibling arrived 8 weeks ago. She goes to sleep fine with us just sitting outside her bedroom then come the middle of the night wakes up and will not go back to sleep for hours. She will change her mind on what she wants ie daddy, my leg hurts etc then resorts to saying she doesn't know what's wrong whilst sobbing usually inconsolably almost like a tantrum
She's usually awake for 2 hours at a time and goes through the motions of being calm, then teary, inconsolable, tantrums, lashing out etc. DH has occasionally been in the spare room to get some sleep whilst I deal with the newborn and for the first few weeks had her sleep with him so we could all get some sleep. It's got to the point where it's unmanageable and she often wakes her sibling so sleep here atm is non existent. I appreciate a new sibling is unsettling but 8 weeks in I thought the novelty would have worn off
DH and I bicker usually in the middle of the night on what to do next, we need a strategy we can both agree to and stick to. She's very stubborn and the "just return her back to her room"'each time she leaves can be difficult when she's inconsolable, rigid and lashing out. It would likely go on for hours. Reward chart has worked intermittently but in the middle of the night she doesn't really care.
Any advice/people been in similar situations? I'm mindful DH has work too and he has been doing more than his fair share with him dealing with DD and me with newborn but we need to share it out. She prefers DH as he's much softer with her hence why we need a joint up approach!