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Original poster

End of my tether

5 replies

BlakeBoyMum · 25/04/2022 19:40

Posting because I'm literally beyond the limits I have.

9m old DS2 sleeping appallingly. Constantly waking, crying, unsettled, I've got no patience for him at all. Never has napped more than 30m anyway if I'm honest, despite dropping down to 2 naps. Was EBF but now I'm back at work FF. Weaning is fine but still needs 4 bottles a day. Is having 2 bottles at night - downs them all and would have milk at every waking if you offered it.

PLEASE don't say "sounds like he hasn't learned to sleep independently yet".

I AM AWARE OF THIS 🙃🙃🙃 I don't know where to begin as never had this problem with DS1. (Who is 2 and was sleeping through no problem but also has decided to wake and cry for Mummy which is just brilliant timing)

Don't want to do cry it out as it'll wake his brother.

Any advice on where I even begin before I lose my mind 😪😪

OP posts:
Avonacha · 26/04/2022 03:11

No advice I'm afraid but just solidarity. My DD's sleep was horrendous at 9 months, I don't know how I bloody survived! It's a little better (sometimes a lot better depending on teeth etc) now at 20 months...but you're obviously looking for a solution NOW :) Would it be possible to increase his milk intake in the day to see if he might drop one of the night time ones? Hope someone is along with some useful info and things get better x

SnackSizeRaisin · 26/04/2022 10:58

Sounds like very hard going. Working plus toddler on no sleep and minimal naps is a bad combination. I would stop giving milk at night completely. Either cut down gradually over about 5 nights or just stop. It's confusing for the baby to get milk on some wakes and not others and can make them wake up more waiting for their milk. They don't need milk at night at 9 months unless underweight. It just ends up disturbing their sleep as they get an energy boost, need a wee, etc. Rock back to sleep or do whatever you need to instead.

If you do that for a week and sleep is still poor, I would seriously consider sleep training using controlled crying. 3 nights of disturbed sleep for your other child may be worth it. The crying won't be all night anyway. Perhaps you could time it for a weekend and he can stay elsewhere for a few nights, or camp in the garden with dad or something.

Better night sleep will almost certainly result in better naps as well, if the baby's only getting 2 half hour naps per day they are chronically over tired and will benefit from better sleep even if it takes a few difficult nights to get there

Original poster
BlakeBoyMum · 26/04/2022 12:06

Avonacha · 26/04/2022 03:11

No advice I'm afraid but just solidarity. My DD's sleep was horrendous at 9 months, I don't know how I bloody survived! It's a little better (sometimes a lot better depending on teeth etc) now at 20 months...but you're obviously looking for a solution NOW :) Would it be possible to increase his milk intake in the day to see if he might drop one of the night time ones? Hope someone is along with some useful info and things get better x

Sympathy is much appreciated so thank you ☺️☺️☺️ I've tried more milk but he won't have it. Think I need to cut the nights to make him have more...

OP posts:
Original poster
BlakeBoyMum · 26/04/2022 12:07

SnackSizeRaisin · 26/04/2022 10:58

Sounds like very hard going. Working plus toddler on no sleep and minimal naps is a bad combination. I would stop giving milk at night completely. Either cut down gradually over about 5 nights or just stop. It's confusing for the baby to get milk on some wakes and not others and can make them wake up more waiting for their milk. They don't need milk at night at 9 months unless underweight. It just ends up disturbing their sleep as they get an energy boost, need a wee, etc. Rock back to sleep or do whatever you need to instead.

If you do that for a week and sleep is still poor, I would seriously consider sleep training using controlled crying. 3 nights of disturbed sleep for your other child may be worth it. The crying won't be all night anyway. Perhaps you could time it for a weekend and he can stay elsewhere for a few nights, or camp in the garden with dad or something.

Better night sleep will almost certainly result in better naps as well, if the baby's only getting 2 half hour naps per day they are chronically over tired and will benefit from better sleep even if it takes a few difficult nights to get there

Thank you. I had started to try phase milk down but he seemed to sleep worse, but I think deep down I know you're right, and seeing it written helps. Short term painful nights for long term better nights right! Thank you again x

OP posts:
Mrsjayy · 26/04/2022 12:12

My eldest is nearly 30 so you might find this out of date,but she was a nightmare sleeping at around 10 months I cut out during the night milk I gave her water and did minimal interaction during the night I would pat her and not speak except to say ita bedtime . I think she, eventually got bored of no attention during the night, it took us 8/ 9 nights to break the cycle she still woke the odd night but not as much.

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