Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

Original poster

9 month old sleep - how bad is this?

18 replies

KO2018 · 09/01/2022 09:37

Hi all - so I just wanted to get opinions from some other mums on whether this sleep pattern is normal for a nine-month-old or horrendously bad…

Nighttime:

  • She wakes up about 2 to 3 times in the night on average. She’s done one wake up twice and I was so excited.
  • Only will be breastfed back to sleep by me. (Daddy has had some success rocking her back to sleep but it’s mostly a fruitless exercise that means we are both awake rather than just me)
  • She will take a bottle but she rarely takes it at night as she’s crying too much.
  • She goes to bed around 6:45/7 after her bath, asleep by 7:30pm (fed to sleep) and always gives us a good evening sleep since forever so we can have our dinner together.
  • Wakes up anywhere between 6am-7:30am (occasionally a run of 5am wakes which is horrible)

Daytime:

  • Only naps in the buggy or the sling/carrier, or the car (ie not the cot)
  • Naps anywhere between 35mins and 2h on average
  • 2 naps a day at 9:30 and 2:30 (ish)

The take home is I’m going to go back to work soon and I haven’t had a single full nights sleep yet since she was born… I think six hours once or twice is the record.

I’m pretty functional most of the time however sometimes I just feel like this is ridiculous and start Googling things like “can you die from lack of sleep?” and “does lack of sleep cause madness?” and “why why why doesn’t my baby just go to sleep?”

Does anyone else have the same experience? I don’t know many other mums so it’s hard to know what’s normal here or when/if it will ever get better…

OP posts:
Liervik · 09/01/2022 09:48

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ for privacy reasons.

Original poster
KO2018 · 09/01/2022 10:15

Hi @Liervik yes it’s all so much worse in the middle of the night. Thankfully feeding to sleep doesn’t take very long but aware it’s a crutch that won’t be there forever.

You need arms of steel to rock a baby to sleep!

OP posts:
ColdShouldersWarmTummy · 09/01/2022 10:20

Mine was similar at 9 months (iirk) except that without fail she'd wake 35 mins after first going to sleep and it would take ages to re-settle her. Mine has always had shit sleep though Sad It improved quite a lot after I stopped feeding to sleep at 13 months but she still wakes at least once a night now (17 months).

LGBirmingham · 09/01/2022 19:38

Probably not what you want to hear but I think for a nine month old (specifically that age) you're getting really good sleep. That's bang in the middle of what seems to be thought of as the worst sleep regression in the first year. I have friends who's children were waking every 45 mins at that age. My son was averaging 5 wakes at that age, when before the regression it was 3. Now at 13 months it's 1 or 2 wakes.

It will get better.

LGBirmingham · 09/01/2022 19:39

This blog post has probably saved my sanity 10 times over www.google.com/amp/s/sarahockwell-smith.com/2017/07/24/the-rollercoaster-of-real-baby-sleep/amp/

NuffSaidSam · 09/01/2022 19:44

It's not unusual.

And it fine if you're happy with it.

If you're not then it's time to look at night weaning and some gentle sleep training.

It's for you to decide if the short term suffering of sleep training is worth the long term benefit of better sleep.

Fallagain · 09/01/2022 19:48

Sounds similar to mine but she is 2.5 years old.

BDavis · 09/01/2022 19:52

@LGBirmingham

Probably not what you want to hear but I think for a nine month old (specifically that age) you're getting really good sleep. That's bang in the middle of what seems to be thought of as the worst sleep regression in the first year. I have friends who's children were waking every 45 mins at that age. My son was averaging 5 wakes at that age, when before the regression it was 3. Now at 13 months it's 1 or 2 wakes.

It will get better.

@LGBirmingham I’m glad you said what I was going to say 🤣 it’s hard OP but I’ve been told it does get better. If it makes you feel any better, mine is 14 months and I’ve not slept longer than 2-3hours at a time since he was born 🤣
LGBirmingham · 09/01/2022 20:12

@BDavis I'd read about the 8 months regression before it happened so I was able to stay relatively chill about it (thanks Sarah Ockwell-Smith) that 4 months one was nearly the death of me though.

WalkingOnSonshine · 09/01/2022 20:16

Sounds very similar to my 12 month old.

We struggle to settle him back into the cot after his first wake up (between 10.30-1) so he just ends up in bed with us.

I swing between being bothered about it & being ok with it.

MaidenoftheSpear · 09/01/2022 20:24

My 9mo DS is pretty much following the same schedule as yours, he might sneak in a pre lunch snooze if he can get away with it though. It's pretty normal which is both reassuring and terrifying (although DD was a horrendous sleeper so this feels easier 😆).
Lack of sleep won't kill you, it just feels like it might. I raise a coffee to you x

ISeeTheLight · 09/01/2022 20:27

That's a lot better than what we used to get with DD...

allofthecheese · 09/01/2022 20:33

This sounds quite normal to me. My 20mo didn't sleep through the night until 16mo, and I mean not even 6 hr stretches. He woke almost every 2 hours every night. It was awful but it gradually got better until he randomly just started sleeping through. We also had to rock to sleep until about 14mo. It was hard but we got through it and you will too! Honestly sleep is developmental and nothing we did worked except just giving it time. I hated people saying that to me when going through it though so I know how you feel! Hope it improves quicker for you.

Workin8til6 · 09/01/2022 20:34

Mine is the same age and sleep sound similar except she wakes more like 4-5 times each night. And naps are almost never longer than 45 mins…

MummyMe87 · 09/01/2022 20:49

Yep. My youngest is 4now but he’s only just started sleeping through in the last 6months.

Up to 2yrs he was waking frequently through the night, would only settle by me etc etc. I survived work somehow, went back at 13months as a midwife.
I have absolutely no advice as I don’t produce sleepers, but you’re not alone

Katieandthekids · 09/01/2022 22:06

Hey! Just wanted to jump on to say this was typical with my twins at 9 months. They got much better after a year and not needing night feeds (we did have to push this a bit though). I would say on average I have to go in once a night for each kid (so twice) because they want a quick cuddle but it's 30 seconds then back to sleep- they are 2

Original poster
KO2018 · 10/01/2022 10:31

Hi everyone thanks for your comments @LGBirmingham that actually does make me feel better believe it or not! It’s when they say babies should sleep through by four months that I get upset like, what did I do wrong?!? But I don’t know anyone who actually has had that happen!

I really should have come here for a reality check before I gave birth haha

OP posts:
BDavis · 10/01/2022 10:59

@KO2018

Hi everyone thanks for your comments *@LGBirmingham* that actually does make me feel better believe it or not! It’s when they say babies should sleep through by four months that I get upset like, what did I do wrong?!? But I don’t know anyone who actually has had that happen!

I really should have come here for a reality check before I gave birth haha

@KO2018 Honestly OP - we’ve all been there 😊 I’m 14months in with my first child so far from being an expert, but the best piece of advice I can give you is to ignore what they “should” be doing 😊 everything happens in these little sleep thief’s own time and not a second before 🤣🤣

You’re doing great 😊

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread