So, are all bad nighttime sleepers clingy in the daytime too? Are there any daytime clingy ones who can sleep all night?

[GreenGlassGoblin]

Just wondering... DS (21 months) is an appalling sleeper, always has been. Also won't be alone in the daytime - can only be left for seconds before he starts to protest, crying and following me (to the kitchen, the loo, the bin...). I can't see how our nighttimes are going to get any better if he is so horrified at the idea of being alone, ever. I'd be really interested to know if anyone has a clingy child who hates to be left, but who can sleep well (give me hope, go on

My 16 month old dd is very clingy at the moment - her little face crumples and she wails like a banshee if I go out of her range of vision during the day. However, she does (usually) sleep at night - we established that bed times means bed time fairly early, and I have an established routine (bath, bottle, teeth brushing and bed with a story) that I stick to come hell or high water. She then stays happily in her cot even if she doesn't go straight to sleep - we often hear her 'talking' to her teddy . A similar routine mostly works for a day time nap, too. Also, dh can settle her if she wakes during the night, whereas during the day, she generally wants to be with me, not her dad. So yes, there is hope. Hang on in there

I have a clingy dd (14 mo) who is (usually) a champion sleeper so it is possible. I put her good sleeping down to the fact that she was prem so had to be taught to stay awake rather than to sleep but that's my obviously made up theory and not very helpful to you!. I would like her to grow out of the clinginess but since you are ahead of me and still dealing with it, perhaps I'm being optimistic.

Have you read the Ferber book on sleeping btw? It made a lot of sense to me. I think you have put your finger on something that features in the book quite a bit - they have to be happy to go to sleep on their own in order to sleep through the night. Although my dd doesn't really like being on her own in the day for more than a minute, she seems to be quite happy and comfortable in bed on her own so I think the day and night time behaviours can be separated successfully. hth

Both dd 4 and ds 1 are shockingly poor sleepers and also super clingy during the day. Never play alone during the day, usually want to be in-and-out of my arms. Parenting them is a 24/7 job. Both co-sleep. In fact, we are still co-sleeping with dd even though she is past 4! If she wakes in the night and finds herself alone, she will give this big wail and come and look for me and ds.

But that is only with dh and I. Both dd and ds are very independent in nursery/school, extremely sociable and interactive, with both teachers and friends. They are both extroverts, I think.

They also sleep great at nursery and outside the home. Dd is fantastic at her grandma's and aunt's home. They are marginally more adventurous with dh than with me.

So ggg, it is not all gloom. Both are terribly cuddly as well, and tactile. I still get hugs, full on kisses, from dd. At her lunchtime ballet class which parents were invited to watch, dd was the only child who came up to give her mother big bear hugs.

It is hard work, but it does have its compensations.

this is all soooo interesting, thank you all. Must admit, I'm absolutely shattered at the moment, and have some very big exams coming up which are weighing on my mind a lot. So I am hoping against hope that DS gets the sleeping idea sooner rather than later. He has just dropped most of his daytime nap, so we'll see what effect that has...